# Don't let your parents be careful in front of you

By [乘飞机](https://paragraph.com/@0x0d11b4997077322ae43150473453475c09271b52) · 2022-02-22

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When I write this title, my heart hurts. Is this forcing us to admit that we owe our parents? From the first day of birth, we have been taught to respect the old and love the young, so how can we do such a thing. We seem to remember that when we carefully pick out the vegetables in the bowl, we always hear our mother yelling at us like a lion in the east of the river: "didn't the teacher teach you not to be picky? If you don't eat vegetables, you will get sick." Then, ignoring our pleading expression, he put the whole bowl of green vegetables in front of us, as the general ordered the soldiers to say, "if you don't eat these green vegetables today, you can't sleep." But I don't know when it began, the painting style gradually became like this: when we were away, there would be no more than two dishes on our parents' dinner table. But as soon as we went back, they immediately turned into a chef. They were eager to take all the dishes in the vegetable market home, both fish and chicken. The table is full for fear of something we don't like. "You don't like eating broccoli. You always say it's raw. This mother eats it, and you eat this..." said while adjusting the sweet and sour ribs in front of her and the broccoli in front of you. But before we moved our chopsticks, we said, "Mom, I'm losing weight and don't eat meat." The next day, the table was green. We may not find that once upon a time, our parents became very obedient to us, just as we listened to them when we were children. As we grew up, we gradually changed from soldiers to generals. When my parents opened our door, they would shout to them, "don't you know you have to knock before entering the house?" When we called countless times to ask when we could get off work, we had already worked overtime to get angry. We would impatiently say to them, "you've called five times since 7 o'clock. Do you want me to do something! I'm not a child and won't get lost. Don't call one time later, OK!" It's a disease that needs treatment, you know? When we were young, did we dare to talk to our parents like this? We didn't dare to say anything about what they asked us to do, so we carried it out immediately. But now, we have grown up and become independent. Instead, they are cautious and dare not say a word in front of us. In fact, the parents are also very poor. When they were young, they worked hard for the family. When their son grew up, he grew old slowly. Afraid of loneliness and family affection, they began to worry about what was wrong with themselves, which would make their children who were already under great pressure unhappy. So they began to become cautious and spoke to us in a tone from the initial order to the current consultation or solicitation, or some flattery. In fact, it's just because they feel old and unable to protect us. Fear of losing our dependence on them and turn to rely on us. What I heard from another friend made me feel more. She said she didn't know when her parents learned how to use QQ and wechat, and added her friends. If she hadn't once said she wanted to eat meat balls from her hometown, she would have seen her mother standing at the door of her house as soon as she got off work the next day, holding a box of meat balls in her arms like a baby. She didn't know they were good friends. Her friend was very angry and didn't ask her parents how they learned to use QQ and wechat. They feel like they're monitoring their lives. She said she still remembered that when she asked loudly why they secretly added her as a friend, her mother said like a child who had done something wrong: she just wanted to see more photos of her and know more about her life. Then flustered and carefully told her that if she didn't like it, they would delete it immediately. Her friend said that she felt so guilty that she wanted to kill herself by hitting the wall. We are not villains, nor do we know filial piety, but why are we still like this? That's because our thoughts and individuals are getting bigger and stronger, and we have changed from a weak position to a strong position. We always say those words and do those things inadvertently and unconsciously. But what we don't understand is that when we were young, we will become bigger and stronger one day, and now our parents will only get older and weaker. So please put away your carelessness and don't let your parents become cautious in front of you.

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*Originally published on [乘飞机](https://paragraph.com/@0x0d11b4997077322ae43150473453475c09271b52/don-t-let-your-parents-be-careful-in-front-of-you)*
