# In Ash on the Sand

*Last Burnt Poems...*

By [Ade's Press](https://paragraph.com/@adespress) · 2024-05-22

poems, poetry, books, freeverse

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![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/b6d250add62bfc6a09ab6b4a30749ba9.jpg)

  
  

A final collection of personal free-verse poetry exploring connections to nature, environment, and modern life.

Ade M. Campbell

_Jan 2023_

\[Here available, 2024, as one of 500 limited edition NFTs minted on BASE and stored on Arweave.\]

* * *

  

**CONTENTS**

*   **Intro…**
    
*   ‘focus’
    
*   ‘that sea’
    
*   ‘down the line’
    
*   ‘flicker’
    
*   ‘close to right now and the future beyond…’
    
*   ‘strange dreamers’
    
*   ‘a power’
    
*   ‘don’t stop’  
    (permaculture thoughts)
    
*   ‘trailer for a remote, fragmented life’
    
*   ‘beyond the dark pines’
    
*   ‘coffee cup thoughts’
    
*   ‘from we, lost foragers’  
    (more permaculture thoughts)
    
*   ‘coastal birds’
    
*   ‘the tree…’
    
*   ‘beyond all hype and bubbles…’
    
*   ‘coast guard’
    
*   'flashes of happiness’
    
*   ‘wind-formed words’
    
*   ‘ceremony’
    
*   ‘relinquish’
    
*   'hey, Future...'
    
*   'don't remember me in words'
    
*   **Extra note…**
    

* * *

  
  
  
  

Intro…
------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/9db128855dfa81839c39852ade54a3ba.jpg)

  
Having moved from rain-soaked South Devon (UK) to the more extreme weather scale of S.W. France (from 2015), I found myself unable to stop this final, fistful of poems. Some, look forward to continued prospects in a new land, and others hark back wistfully to Devon days, and childhood times there. ‘Larger’ themes I guess also emerged...\[eg. towards a 'regenerative art' phase.\]

Environment shapes us, and we adapt painfully fast, or more slowly and surely. Maybe writing, reflecting and journal-making are part of this process. In nature, some species ‘dance with ghosts’ for a while, when their environment disappears completely; when their genetic traits have no more application. They need to change, and come up with something new.

My poems are not very practical (and could be more so) but each one wants to say something final, in many ways. These ones _are_ final,  because I’m onto other things, in this diverse business of living, surviving, thinking, sharing, and being...!

_1/2023_

\[Note: AI + Chat-GPT would soon arrive, which led to 'An Ode to Mankind' where some of these + earlier poems I'd 'rewrite' - or expand on - via experiments with the technology. The works here are all the originals.\]

* * *

‘focus’
-------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/ec5a7c22fcac9b75c54ed811d55a78ae.jpg)

where is my focus?  
now — finally — close by ?

i sit nearer to its red heart and pray  
that this fresh boat is varnished,  
sealed enough — and dried  
to cast a good song -  
a swan song — into the fray.

changing world…  
i sit with the stones now  
feeling some power still  
as the waves withdraw, pulling  
the very core of me… _back_.  

i scramble for cigarettes; fast food;  
more sugary things — to soak in -  
and the lakes;  
rich and black -  
drilled -  
for more dips  
into caffeinated depths…

_as the fire crackles on  
behind the new glass._

.

.

.

  

\[lyrics in image are from ‘riot on an empty street’  
by kings of convenience, ack.\]

  
  
  
  
  

  

_‘that_ sea’
------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/9f6801b1b7a8c8c45ff384ab7c639780.jpg)

  

Death is shining at me  
in the distance -  
in that great sea -  
beautiful -  
in the blue light  
of faster, former days.

only now I see It — feel It —  
closer now,  
moving inside me, too,  
with those waves  
of my annihilation.

i’m waiting to be hooked out;  
cast into some sea beyond  
even, this golden sun.

.

sure, we’ve worked; we’ve played  
in the bright wake;  
defied It for some while  
shifting our dreams,  
tapping on proud castles in the sand;  
all these many forms of fishing  
for the reeling in — tight turns -  
to lend us ‘peace’; notions of control;  
while It slumbers there — or wakes;  
to shed Its scale, so deep,  
Its mystery  
wide and ever-tempting; to drink up,  
then sleep off on the beach.

it’s no mystery:  
that sea is Death  
It breathes; It breaks into life;  
It brings new life to us more sunken  
in the sand; this hungry shore.

hello -  
i take a photo and admire the light  
but it does not capture this  
inner-sea beneath; my turtle soul  
blanched and overheating  
toiling now more slowly  
over its sharp, dry rocks.

It will pull us away you know, or crush us;  
shells like stars  
summoning tired bones.  
and we will go;  
fall down on the shore once more.  
born — we were, and bound — to slide -  
or be winked out;  
pulled back to fill the world’s spaces  
as our fingers forged new patterns  
of its thriving; surviving  
shadows.

isn’t it great to love  
such an idea of Death?  
to marvel for a moment  
how everything is shaped by that Sea:  
the very shape of this hustling, bustling shore.

yes — _everything_ is Death, or has been:  
trees, notched and crooked,  
grains of sand, fine-honed those gemstones  
beyond so many flickering plans,  
brief, sudden laughter, drowned by  
harsh separations  
barely noticed; in our imprisonments  
from each other.

i cannot say much more, of course.  
we are Its avatars,  
loaned-out creations - and -  
It is a force  
we ride, and are ridden  
far, and away…

from plans, to have no plans;  
to pass long before our time is run  
or surrendering our selves - to just be old;  
tilling the land;  
ignored, as worn-out sand-keepers  
letting others live;  
sharing in their joy;  
smiling simply into the wind and the waves  
with all other half-baked notions  
washed and cleaned and dried.

remember… _me?_… _why?  
_‘i’ was just another of Life’s white lies,  
another of Death’s tools  
working together for a while

to feed what Life is emerging  
in the careless, care-free  
flames of those waves out there  
whispering  
they were always there.

.

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/8f67e96ff186ab4fe47b942f717af548.jpg)

  

_‘Oh, how, time flies  
With crystal clear eyes  
And cold as coal  
When you’re ending with diamond eyes.’_

\[inspired by a song ‘cross bones style’ by cat power and the coastline of s.west england, uk.\]

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT\]

  
  
  

  
  

‘down the line’
---------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/27d69c7258c4098d31fc156fe5dd18af.jpg)

.

i see problems down the line;  
i look away — look down;  
(not sure where to look)  
i know they’re inside; i know they’re mine;  
this situation slipping us  
right out of our minds  
though we were chosen — _we_ chose it —  
now we’re living it.

…

it could still break us  
over time;  
a storm, forewarned,  
without measures to take out — into the rain.  
this could wreck our train — next time,  
then freeze and let the winter in  
all down the line.

.

i see problems down the line  
my weakness rising; my spirit looking to the door  
maybe I can fix it — fix me —  
remember where I’m going and still get there  
in all this…

i write _this_ — even —  
cast it out from the abyss;  
it might be enough  
but does it _really_ exist?  
_no…_ not above the cold dice  
inside stark and creaking dawns;  
the racing, shunting down life’s noisy tracks  
right over thorns…

.

hey, i see problems down the line;  
they’ve blasted tires, caused delays  
but i think; I hope —  
_you_ know —  
if it’s all to crack…

i wanted to be there; be free… with you…  
for the record  
even with the anchors we would drag  
across the floor

i saw beyond it…  
_all_ problems… _even_ the line…

i knew that Time would wear our chains away  
not without us getting frayed  
or knocked around  
but that _some_ part would hold on fast,  
never close that door; _our_ door,  
or feel dismayed  
or let the darkness eat us up, with all our deeper sun -  
so warm -  
to the _core_ of the earth.

.

_but I should go_…

this message ends.  
Love clings to itself, in fiery dances  
enchanted,  
gets one big chance  
for then  
Nature’s furnace calls again — for food —  
and it _must_ feed…

…all through the lines

_in Time…_

.

.

.

.

(c.2019)

acknowledgments to:  
‘down the line’ a song by jose gonzalez

  
  

‘flicker’
---------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/45440259b6a008e99d6b7acbf255dadc.jpg)

  
  

don’t ask me to remember  
or to dwell for long  
on what lies beyond  
thru windows and thru doors  
of everything around me… _here_;  
in this mansion of one moment  
flickering to the next:  
_it’s all before me…_

it’s where I live.  
i struggle _not_ to strive  
to straddle Time, and distance -  
but just blur them into one.  
with coffee gone dry; internet all dead  
i’m ambling up and down  
my driveway now  
letting the grass grow — great…

so,  
don’t ask me to remember  
what so quickly burned;  
yes… a candle needs its wick, and air,  
light hands to light it; keep it fit  
but, fuel and flame  
we’re all the same  
burning one another, burning up ourselves  
with what has come before;  
what might come after…

… at such near cost;  
the cost of hardly gazing  
thru these stems, so tall  
and present;  
owned not by time but so much quick life  
appearing; tangled up;  
overwhelmed — yet unfazed  
by the finding of itself, inside it all.

.

.

.

.

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT\]

  

  

‘close to right now and the future beyond…’
-------------------------------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/7006d8fd63c512c41cb373ba559047c6.jpg)

_(from an animated photo-art piece, taken on the edge of Dartmoor)_

  
  
  

close to right now and the future beyond  
lies the present…

.…some new influence  
or encounter with nature;  
the next hunt and reward  
where what our inner nature dictates  
lies the beginning of our work;  
the tomorrow it can create.

.

mostly,  
it is restriction in the now; freedom later,  
eyes searching for something to be dazzled by, again

but —

all our ‘meaning’ is defined by our efforts;  
by the way in which we do or achieve things;  
by whatever box or boundary we are restricted by —  
confined in —  
on a path to some harmonious kind of being…

where the jewels in the far light can be stared into  
because we seized just a few of them;  
those that were there, too  
right in front of us.

.

  

(2021)

  

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT (art + poem)\]

  

‘strange dreamers’
------------------

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/e2920a817e05da53a91ac9100c27cec7.jpg)

  
_(from ‘Organic Metaverse’ Ai NFT collection)_

  

who or what are we?  
where _are_ we going?  
our longer legs  
which found the solid ground  
  
now stride about, and over it,  
balancing; reinforcing rows of toes  
which lost the refuge of the trees, the air;  
arched feet gripping trunks; lifting us up high like our cousins -  
humbled by Time and presence-  
now there’s just the breath of the land.

..

we wander off, don’t we?  
wondering where to be  
and who we are…

our arms, our clutching hands  
once hugged those trees  
finding fruit and spreading seeds  
now,  
they scoop the earth  
to find and bend at plants; at things; make sounds;  
we’re happy with our foraging; our sudden findings  
still spreading seeds  
within, across, great boundaries.  
how much takes root?  
how much is cut down?

..

science, i do not know  
knows much at all.  
nature can take its course:  
how to live, can be taught through skills ingrained already;  
senses, tuned to the wind  
in so many ways -  
intuitively testing -  
while all this work, and search,  
leads us up, and out,  
and back again…  
short rewards —  
yearning towards  
some other, endless future  
beyond just one more,  
once-golden dawn…

where… we had some fun, didn’t we?  
monkey laughs -  
ballooning out, across the plains.  
ridiculous, loveable us  
against that crude and cutting distance which those trees had hidden so well  
up to the stars  
between our families, cousins, old friends  
driving away our fears with fresh  
but dominating plans.  
  

hey, maybe we can find our way  
through the darker days  
through more powerful dreams that bleed  
away, into the night —  
back —  
into the light — can you lead us?  
back into words, and sounds  
the working together —  
the knowing of one another;  
all we mean to the world.

…

more energy — we are —  
with just one ‘real’ need —  
to reconnect our souls  
once more to the rich earth,  
spread its richness, make more air-  
make love —  
for young kids breathing, building,  
sharing the fruits of small labours  
keeping us close and pure, and free, to the end;  
to be run down; so beautifully tired all over again  
by working with the sun.

just know this, ok…  
wise animals  
may be simple, and in tune;  
unconfined, beyond  
territorial disputes  
never again —  
their own worst enemy.  
even — with so many baseless schemes, ideas and fears  
obsessions of control —  
all cast out.

Life is making us, shaking us, loving us,  
hiding us, crushing us  
back again, into death.  
we will be wronged by others who are right  
in the dark of their night —  
some justice to be fought or foraged for —  
reclaimed, in the light  
of a new morning.

yes, the land, the sea — those trees,  
still shape us in their meaner Time,  
pulling us ever by our hunger, thirst  
our mutual growing, nurturing,  
cycling, of a system  
superbly super-spreading...

…beyond the ceaseless stabbing at more  
wild and abstract plans…  
to re-possess those perfect, golden lands  
which shine to empower us,  
blinker and distract,  
follow old or reinvented maps  
keeping us, calling us  
from the bright but buried  
campfire bones  
still in the deep woods —  
but blackened with our broken hopes  
of ever finding them…

where so many wait and watch  
and waste away  
with soon-forgotten tales about the  
latest, escapist games,  
their heady, controlling,  
super-powers which separate  
and where the simple meaning of our being  
is buried again beneath  
the strangest of dreams.

…

..

.

(2022)

  

\[Collectible as separate NFT\]  
  

  
  

------

  
  
  

‘a power’
---------

  
  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/dc179ced039398528795bb0acfeef7dc.jpg)

  
_(from NFT ‘inkgems’ collection)_

  

_This_  
is my real art;  
some marks upon the cosmos  
but i am not ‘i’ — am i?  
only for moments  
_‘i am Nature’;_  
a phantom of this force.

so what do ‘we’ become  
oh phantom world?  
our own ideas of someone.  
once, like you,  
i spread the seeds of new trees  
i tried to become  
unseen, but all powerful.

.

_maybe ‘i’ am…  
maybe ‘we’ are…_

.

  

.

(2021)  
  

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT\]

‘don’t stop’  
(permaculture thoughts)
--------------------------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/3df3deb75afae916a722580c30ba0dff.jpg)

  
_‘Organic Metaverse’ NFTs_

  

the guy on the TV  
doesn’t stop  
knowing it all  
(or seeming to know)  
but, this _other_ guy  
at least, shows  
how to tend  
or keep in tune  
with a ‘productive food forest’.

so can we  
make the whole Earth  
into a productive food forest?  
harness, in harmony  
our great technology too  
(this time)  
for many of us have learned  
in the course of our lives  
feeling lost is easy  
in a too-easy world  
severed from the land; the sea; the open sky.

maybe we could  
swap so many people  
for trees  
then have a party.  
_just kidding_ -  
Nature will do this for us  
once it’s burned us all back  
since it feels a little late  
to start loving her  
now we know (do _you_ know?)  
we’re a part of the show-  
one more energy flow  
yearning, ever-burning…

where we’ve been learning  
to overcome her;  
plunder the reserves  
in her deep bones  
so wonderfully  
to feel as though  
we can belong here  
for so long…

_still learning then…  
all just a phase…_  
energy’s not _all_ bad, you know,  
and it does _try_ to make us  
work together.

maybe  
we can make it thru  
to some re-balancing…

if we don’t stop  
tending to it all,  
or keeping more in tune  
or thinking…  
about tomorrow.

many will die,  
some may thrive  
less estranged,  
less deranged  
maybe even  
better than before…

before  
this watery, miracle planet  
fills up and overflows -  
washing itself free of us…  
to bloom again…  
and spread the next crazed seeds  
across the galaxy.

.

_it_ was our god, you know  
not all these other strange shows  
but unlike this guy  
we’ve not been turning up  
for mindful worship;  
to pay our respects  
or pray enough…

but when yesterday’s gone  
for those still  
wandering about in the sun  
unable, or not thinking in the shade -  
  
Nature is the cruel teacher.

  

_don’t you look back_…

.

.

.

.

\[acknowledgment: dave holmgren interview (happen films)  
acknowledgment: fleetwood mac ‘don’t stop’\]

  

‘trailer for a remote, fragmented life’
---------------------------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/b38bf243ee49ba05a39d23da4d42e884.jpg)

  
  

hey, it’s _starting_…

.

fragments of a life

my life is a trailer

i got a little sidetracked you see

by people leading me

out — or in -

thru places, yes,

spaces

strange but now… i’m _here_; remote working

i’m remote -

_cheers_, Time.

.

.

i was gathering up; got stuck

but why not come join me,

i’m piecing it all back together

at least I put myself — in this here, this time

i think

between these lines

and my answer is…

_ideas_ — i can throw you some

while we hope to be more local -

AR glasses

closing distance in an instant -

on demand…

.

so come find me… or I’ll find you…

_why?_ and what to say…

the house is warm,

i shuffle about

modernity; edges of a decadence

depriving us of the very notion

of fulfillment -

those pathways to some peace, or ‘peaceful living’.

.

_at least let it now be finished… or be reunited…_

.

yeah… let’s start again

let’s not be so apart

let’s build our worlds where we can

since everything seems so keen

on falling apart

the movies will stop moving -

ours too -

so let’s relinquish what was always bound

to relinquish us…

.

cigars, fine wine, good song

let’s share

you know, there’s nothing really _there_ for you

those glorious roads

but everything’s here…

.

_come on_, why not

fall down — together -

since we’re going over -

going down -

then back online, rebooted

and in between

let’s break our own configurations

smile at some mornings,

command new projects,

overturn some motions

and be ever-famous to the stars

we’ve left behind…

.

everything, you see, has changed

outside the present we may change, or never change.

we dreamed; now we do the work

shot for those stars — too far -

then dried our eyes, were friends again

whatever works…

.

our movie starts…

the wind projecting

through the trees we needed -

what we needed -

already playing nature’s roles, we were

while we moved, were moved

and dispersed…

.

…more seeds…

.

_ha!_

_ahhh_, you know, _it never mattered_…

_our energy, configuring energy…_

.

.

.

  
  
  
  

.

‘beyond the dark pines’
-----------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/7a61011937655138e603864db58d01c1.jpg)

  

that shore;  
it’s been calling us all day  
beyond that line  
of old, dark pines.  
i’m sure, there’ll be treasures to find;  
strange, blue wonders  
lost in a time;  
hidden within those overlooked,  
seaweed-soaked, sodden estuaries.

.

.

since it’s now our turn  
let’s go down,  
to that bustling old sea-town,  
hushed for now  
by gusts of this great wind  
whispering…

of something still to learn  
in seeing — what we can see;  
some mystery, unknown  
in being — simple, free  
as all we can be…  
keep close and  
maybe we’ll make it  
back home safely  
before the stealthy tide  
turns steadily against us…

.

even our small but hardy crew  
of fired-up pirates — intent -  
on finding, sharing  
all the secret light there is  
on this bright  
and dark earth.

.

and what did we smuggle back?  
or salvage:  
a fine, abandoned shell,  
the smoothest rock,  
an old piece of string  
to wind around the years  
and attach us, bind us, to that source  
of everything around  
still drawing and  
calling us within…

.

and where will we steal such power?  
to the pulling moon…  
out — to other, far stars…  
or put back in that land  
thrilling and wild  
where fierce, sun-filled daffodils  
bunched in the hand  
belonged to us  
with all the tiny changes;  
living signs and sounds -  
cold, soaked or warm -  
challenges; inciting us  
to new riots along the sand.

.

indeed  
the sun breaks -  
and we too — against  
those fast, foaming treasures of the sea  
freezing our feet  
breaking us back out,  
or down  
in laughter fits;  
falling around the wide, giant bay  
scattering; splashing us raw  
into its shocking, fresh,  
timeless time…

.

but soon -  
battened down against a wind -  
becoming gale -  
battering another night -  
and nearly all night long  
wide awake  
  
thinking, listening -  
  
at the end — dreaming -  
of what more could possibly lie  
out beyond those dark,  
now darkening pines…

.

you know, I know -  
the new kind  
will hunt and gather -  
maybe find -  
something new  
to burn and shine  
for a short time…  
draw and excite  
then slip away…

  

like grains of that shore’s  
warming sand  
through our ever-young,  
ever-reaching  
fiery hearts…

.

and these sea-cold hands…  
with still, its great  
and ceaseless work  
causing me to pause, assemble,  
and make plans.

  

.

.

  

(2021)  
  
  

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT\]

  

‘coffee cup thoughts’
---------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/55d5a3f8df93939625d4c97e571b2fa0.jpg)

  

let me live a life — _entirely_  
within the after-burning,  
  
sweet _kick_, and swig  
  
of a good, strong coffee…

.

in full-flow  
stuck in its warm, energy-glow,  
distilled thru the sun’s black fruit -  
  
_fired-up_ — from its froth -  
  
I _become_ the sun…

filling up with Time…  
reinventing gods and myths…  
becoming known -  
liberating myself above all the world -  
in inspiration — _pure_ \-

without

ever

slipping away, or down

soft — ghostly -

once more, to it all…

….

…losing to the moon;  
returned - to that realm of  
locked reflection, gloom -  
Distraction in command  
only  
of the waves that will cover  
all our statues soon

with these strangely crooked,  
crafty towers…  
  
(straining under  
white bag-loads  
of sodden,  
soggy, sand-words.)

  

.

..

…

…..

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT\]

  
  

  

‘from we, lost foragers’  
(more permaculture thoughts)
-------------------------------------------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/35c6466d75c2e0c0429acf4a6a9f362a.jpg)

beyond the TV panel  
problems deepen.  
in the garden  
great walnuts shake their leaves  
while all around their base,  
they inhibit growth with juglone.

it’s one way  
to defend a world, alone  
with a magic circle  
poisoning off the competition.

.

and we, lost foragers;  
with strange ideas  
and poisons too  
who roamed and pillaged the four corners…

we’ll use some seeds now  
from our circles, overgrown  
in the needy breeze  
we’ll fashion words,  
drop _them_ into hard nuts  
hoping legacies and learning from before  
living within us now  
can be cracked open -  
sown -  
in some life beyond.

.

we’ll reintroduce  
the forest floor  
we cleaned away  
even restore  
more open, sustainable solutions.  
in our quick time  
too quick for thinking  
but at least  
we got there in the end.

.

our sons and daughters  
can carry a new know-how  
about living together,  
sharing and foraging again.  
they’ll have to  
find some road ahead, or back,  
more in harmony…

.

but is there, even  
such a thing  
in this hungry, smash-and-grab,  
over-controlled,  
juglone-soaked world…  
as ‘harmony’?

.

.

_sure…_ ‘_we can work it out  
life is very short  
and there’s no time  
for fussing and fighting, my friend._’...

.

.

.

.

\[acknowledgment: Beatles, ‘we can work it out’\]

  

  

‘coastal birds’
---------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/9b8038d9eb5daf88f0ab3442d5990054.jpg)

.

the wind again;  
it owned that place;  
we were not supposed to be there  
hiding out  
on a cliff-edge.

.

below us, dark sea blasted  
netted stacks of stones  
holding us in place.  
that bright morning  
black rooks had tried to warn us -  
about it all  
through their high, ragged calls.

well,  
it could now actually be  
the _end_ of us-  
battened down as we buried heads inside warm beds -  
like birds in one of those  
dark pine trees  
we would fall and not matter to the world;  
its turning, booming, crashing storm  
rolling out battalions of waves on another dark,  
abandoned planet.

.

or else we might — even —  
win through in the end -  
you’d hope;  
break away —in rockets — up to other stars;  
some display at least against  
that sleeping force  
threatening again to snuff our fires  
so easily out.

.

for yes, that night, was a _battle  
_only dumb men would presume to dart out into  
or describe;  
believe they could ever conquer…

we are just birds -  
grounded it’s true -  
but only birds  
fleeing and flung, into new, blue skies,  
opening up a while  
clasping our crooked worms;  
landing more and more  
into any safer, quieter corners.

.

did you ever, like,  
_like_ this world, we held out against?  
where we walked and talked  
and decided, what we needed  
to decide on next;  
where our minds -

still fly and roam, swiftly  
stirring our stomachs again -  
through the great night -  
those nights -  
some time ago…

yet only figments to this lost world  
we serve utterly and will return to  
wake up in again then be worn down,  
sleep deeply, snugly into;  
for the length of a dream it seemed  
to have some need of us…

our fires maybe, are like its deep fire  
feeding on its own creations,  
where each will face that storm —  
embrace — fully what its life is, what our death’s merger means;  
for this blind biosphere  
some freedom and great sacrifice;  
our erasure, for its grind; its continuance.

.

.

.

.

(2021)

reference: dylan thomas ‘the force that through the green fuse’

  

  
‘the tree…’
--------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/0de7e844dbe354b177b369c6c655663a.jpg)

.

… is a closed temple;  
i cannot ascend  
up the slow-formed, fountain of limbs  
like carved pillars  
or pay homage to its self-made existence  
with my own short life and death;  
nor any physical act  
of worship, to praise  
something which an inner tree in me  
is looking up to;  
reaching out through these leafy words.

.

my mind tries to follow its routes;  
drink it in; explore such a spectacle.  
but i cannot go up  
except with crude tools, or from this shade  
watching like a long-legged pirate  
eyeing up its treasures —

since all its deeper magic; high, nautical thrills  
sway, locked to us all now;  
hidden in thick time  
behind walls of its  
mute and towering,  
true, elemental house.

.

or is it I  
stricken blind and deaf  
to understand;  
interpret correctly its great umbrella art  
creating some sanctuary on display -  
in which i stand —  
against the cruel sky.

.

noises come down;  
my eyes are overwhelmed by  
light and shadow.  
it fills the space massively  
with its thin solar panels  
fueling a patience and growth  
so maternal and alive  
with tiny things  
invisible to my slow,  
thought-dreary gaze;  
simply over-awed by its presence.  
i almost merge, in longing  
to be more embedded and entranced;  
charged up  
by its myriad processes,  
occupying space;  
and generating my very air.

.

why and how  
did we abandon them…  
they may encroach upon our houses but  
they have new inhabitants now  
enjoying everything:  
refuge, food, freshness,  
the sudden rush of  
height and danger  
their lives and quicker deaths  
all part of the deal; a cycle  
owned and possessed by them all.

monkeys share this secret  
without question — it’s irrelevant;  
looking down upon us  
like strangers;  
distant cousins we simply  
never knew; never grew up with.

besides, they’re busy, being alive;  
serving their quiet gods — keyed-in  
to the buzz of each other.

.

who am I? My inner tree speaks.  
not a complete imposter  
but removed from this great home now  
not welcome — welcomed.  
it doesn’t matter  
we poorer, earth-bound lives  
still spread seeds; jumping and traversing  
other, stranger kinds of tree.  
we ride horses, drawing up,  
hushed as ranchers before an ancient Indian chief;  
i’ve no idea  
what I’m doing here  
i occupy space too — but none up there.

one of its winged dwellers — afraid -  
casts upward into its network of arms  
suspecting me of ill intent,  
indeed, I have burned other, whole villages  
i can’t remember why.  
this is summer  
everything re-surfacing  
its creatures play  
the ultimate video game;  
roaming an open world to be truly  
immersed in:  
one of instant need; no planning —  
just to forage and be risky, frisky  
on the edge of everything  
since everything really does  
exist on a keen edge.

.

yet I only know this.  
i cannot feel it here, or now.  
i walk away; retreat  
to carve my own dry sounds  
to my lost comrades  
clicking on and off  
slick gadgets  
costing time and money;  
lost upon this other,  
more encompassing world  
we imitate; celebrate  
in so many ways…

this secretive tree  
still summoning, overlooks  
a garden corner with long grass  
bending, flexing in the winds’ blasts  
but is not overlooked, by me at least,  
or — you — it seems  
still following? — looking upwards too -  
until the very end  
of this tree verse  
all now spread out; run through  
with roots put down into a cultured soil  
though they may not go as deep  
or go deep enough…

.

not if either this life, or this art  
hopes it can outlast  
our doomsday secret, hidden in the ruins in that wind  
whispering something more  
about some rising, retaliatory plan  
to either cut us back, or bring us crashing down…

for other, fresh things to grow and fill  
the dark space  
where everything rests and stands.

.

and i tell myself again…  
to burn the last of this written, treelike art  
to mint and serve new life;  
to simply nurture trees which open eyes  
and fill up time and space — far better — in its stead.

.

.

.

2021.

note: tree inspiration was/is a large Tilleul (Lime tree) in S.W France.

  

\[Collectible as separate NFT\]  

  

‘beyond all hype and bubbles…’
------------------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/38f1e015b2e0bc7e47edbf38c0944f9a.jpg)

  
  

  

old photos  
feature outlines of pines.  
a distant ship  
shifts on the horizon.

.

beneath this,  
lie the treasures of Time  
to spend away, today,  
down by the sea,  
not always looking ahead  
or feeling so numb, comfortably.

.

many, were found -  
then lost -  
or at least  
held for a while…

.

you know, one day  
we will forget everything,  
our lies, our strange ideas -  
these words -  
even this wind which brought us;  
bound us, so close.

.

will we find our future?  
do you think?  
_no_, don’t cry  
or be dragged down  
remember a here; the now…

your pure joy, rising up  
through every moment -  
the very first and last -  
not written yet — or far off  
but snug — as we were -  
within that timeless,  
time-forged coast -  
its new pioneers…

where everything that ever was,  
and is -  
_still_ is -  
forever near; attainable;  
forever incredible and possible…

yes, possible…

.

.

.

.

(2021)  
  

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT\]

‘coast guard’
-------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/ae6212f19c29676ea63c473f733b2fcc.jpg)

  

in the dark I lie back  
thinking of when I first heard such  
desolate presence  
turning and pounding at a near shore  
changed utterly by a storm  
quietly raving; crashing and  
eroding time  
beneath heaps of stones,  
under directing stars;  
even a vengeful moon.

.

that sound — oblivious to men —  
is no friend of  
everything we stand for  
everything we hold dear.

.

besides  
there was only just a TV signal,  
a small open fire had warmed  
our perched and cosy nest  
and life was newly-fired but now so fragile  
where our family clan lay —  
except for I —  
listening…

timing…

the next bleak and random space between each close

and far-off breaker.

.

it really is our dark earth; our troubled sea  
conspiring against us;  
expelling or at least  
getting it all out, or something.

.

under such siege  
others slept on warmly  
thru that loosening, booming night…  
then i too…  
buried deeply in between —

and found rest  
within oblivion…

…

before

.

a brand new day -  
bound to come back beyond the dark  
to herald -

.

brave, fresh adventures  
for our greedy spirits, surging  
to ride out again; to seek the source  
of all that restless power  
beneath the near and steady horses of  
our parents love.

.

you know  
the memory of those waves —  
and my fear —  
all turned over; changed;  
into bright wet sand; seaweed wreckage,  
running — to tame a land  
of windy, fresh mornings,  
ransacked and renewed  
for quick plunder together  
as the waves worked on, distracted;  
so far out —

.

we stole their treasures while they regrouped;  
hushed; more settled; sure — but still…  
and ever since  
i think on it —

.

that sound, cementing us  
in a fiercer realm; that time  
ruled by timeless, unstoppable stallions  
forever charging, rising,  
spilling and commanding —  
from their distance in the dark —  
smothered, yet ever present,  
beyond the measured law  
of each  
and every day  
since childhood…

.

since the music and voices grew all around us  
and let us softly drown.

.

.

.

.

  

.

(2020/1)

  

\[2nd last line: see ‘ghost song’ by jim morrison  
last line: see ‘the wasteland’ by ts eliot\]

‘flashes of happiness’
----------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/e8631d2727c317e20a890525892cd840.jpg)

flashes of happiness  
are what we live for; strive for;  
quick hits of contentment  
as we ride, or play well  
this mad, game/storm  
of our lives…

but  
will _you_ hold fast? will _we?_  
while blasted across blunted rocks;  
these crude formations, fading in;  
blocking off routes…

will we stand tall, and at the last?  
beyond every after; not just the before  
we tried to make those moments last.

..

_no_,  
it’s not all plain sailing -  
brows furrow once more -  
clouds, they crowd back in;  
we’ll tow again on that long, and winding line  
binding us all;  
leading us in — to some far shore -  
or as Browning said  
_‘what’s a Heaven for?’_

.

.

  

‘wind-formed words’
-------------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/0bba52578c038e590bdca62eb5f781f8.jpg)

.

Art… \[go on…\]  
is a bit like \[_pause_\]  
…being continually cut off  
on the phone —

_hello?_

.

oh, you had just been  
describing how you feel  
about… _things…_

..

so you lay it down;  
try and get it just right  
be fair, and true; be clear -  
self-effacing too —  
it wasn’t my fault  
all this selfish being  
in this wind —

a few ideas to share to ‘culture’  
which — i am sorry  
(to say) must be sold,  
i am selling…

.

more art magic  
can be summoned to rise  
like a force, reflecting,  
reaching for some high, sunny peak  
by scaling through dry,  
word mountains…

  
but it’s a fast fountain -  
mighty — or a tiny expression;  
it wants to blow thru a person  
is it the world talking  
through us  
you know?

maybe… _what the_…!

\[hello?\]

HELLO?!

.

…so now you won’t know…  
about the force  
and that power outside -  
that’s inside -  
in your nature.

.

you’ll have to  
put your time to some other use.

\[_The wind presses again. Something falls._\]

the air outside  
wants to alter us more.

.

\[_He..ll..ohhh...?_\]

…

you needed to talk…  
in this way  
culture will go on… warping;  
filling out, diverse,  
contracting…  
in…  
those storms,  
like that sea  
fashioning…

.

things will remain  
like your words in my brain —  
is it from some old song…

.

all set to change things again.

.

.

we’re up next…

.

how this world needs  
we steady chain of ghosts  
to walk and explore it;  
haunt it, and sing;  
make some power, unleashed  
to control  
then make peace with it…

.

just work with it.

\[okay…\]

.

.

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT\]

  

‘ceremony’
----------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/6189e1777edac639ed9a13b7d2e795c9.jpg)

  

we must destroy  
each other  
before the world  
destroys us

groping, closer  
in our brimming homes  
high above  
the world’s unbounded power,  
ceaseless and spare

.

the new, TV news  
gathers us in  
but i need you here  
to share this form I bare —  
this body —  
with all its fire  
for you — for all your kind —  
for on my own  
i can be strong  
but i am _nothing_ \-  
a ghost enjoyed by ghosts -  
i am no stark  
victim of your next decision,  
or abrupt,  
enveloping moves.

.

it’s only someone  
such as you —  
your feline folk —  
who keep me real, and clear:  
fangs bared and sharp,  
tongue lolling;  
my mind primed;  
ready to blow.

it’s how it is —  
you know —  
we all share  
in our desires  
everywhere;  
worlds of desire  
destroying — to be destroyed;  
surviving — to survive  
ourselves  
until …our fires die out -  
or are subdued…

…and we are freer,  
emptier shells  
painting each other;  
creating games with words;  
lip-syncing from the shade  
or noticing change;  
smiling up at that sun  
which will burn us  
altogether.

.

others may notice our destruction  
even witness it  
but they’ll never feel more -  
_no_, they never partook of it.

.

believe me  
we’ll have a great feast  
and after  
start out again  
into the unknown  
foraging in fresh estuaries.  
just as everything we’ve come to know  
once was — unknown,  
strange and new  
this Earth, to be discovered

.

just as we were  
discovered  
while discovering  
in our joy;  
destroying —  
in this wind’s bitter grip -  
amid old ghosts  
of the destroyed;  
the once-proud, empowered  
departed

.

we’ve survived their desire  
and must keep on  
loving and not hearing,  
fearing  
or becoming them.

how we laughed at them!  
and i recall that chilly breeze  
how it made the whole  
hushed and flowing scene  
of sand; of sunlit water -  
flash with gold -  
beneath my only small, warmed toes  
digging in…  
i heard only a few  
high cries, ecstatic yells  
from other souls — very far out -  
lost in the breakers.

.

harsh beauty,  
we must perform  
our ceremony of fire  
enough times,  
before all time.

we must remember  
this is what we were — once;  
it’s what we are —  
raw _energy  
_controlled by that chaos — ancient;  
older than the hills  
around our bones

as we stare back —  
stare down —  
from atop such soft  
but brittle,  
shifting thrones  
so many fathoms out -  
to that far source —  
that shining sea…  
and hear it crash once more;  
hear it roar beneath.

…

  

(2021)

\[last line: ‘hamlet’\]

  
\[Collectible as separate NFT\]

  
  
  

‘relinquish’
------------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/42d91931f87287a0f4013df680de8ee8.jpg)

  
_Tintagel, Cornwall, uk_

  

the game is playing  
so control me-  
_i_ am the game;  
move me; mould me  
out across the plains.  
this day — today;  
what will you have us do?  
to get through you,  
be fully known -  
beyond the burning, up,  
in those old, wild stars;  
your secret hearts.

.

those scars — they burn  
was that _you?!_  
it was… until i could relinquish  
and be done with it all,  
become  
unknown — you know, completely  
_completed_; lost…  
in stars i dreamed i’d own  
beyond a good home.

.

stop the game, this train  
let’s go there — _where?_ back home,  
zone out,  
watch ourselves, from afar,  
you know, those stars…  
laugh — _can we?_ Together  
when we laughed how I loved you…

.

Life; it need never now, be hard  
and it was never  
but it will never  
stop burning…

.

(Sleep, that tired tide of nothingness, break over me…  
far away — from struggle and race,  
from where we hardly were…  
_were_ we? _really?_ — _No…_)  
  
i was.  
i did.  
was done… _who won?_

well… those new trees are growing,  
knowing  
they grew through me  
at least  
the burning, burned me  
letting me, at least —  
and at the last,  
laugh a little… or for a while…

.

.

.

.

### hey, Future...

you're silent, unknown

and thus - ever -

filled with

our big ideas -

big talk -

getting lost

on a good moment.

.

Tomorrow is

your dream and your struggle

but will soon steal

the light out of another bright morning.

.

our Future is

expected

to be full of power, surprises -

collapse -

world peace?

more time outside?

less?

or a faceless mass

with - vaguely - brave new worlds

in virtual arenas...

.

so you'll be told

whatever...

but I think there should ever be

the ‘us’ - bound to the earth -

coming back to

rough contact,

growing, shaping,

the truth from our own toil, the feeling tired

right here in the now -

from the sowing to the reaping;

the feasting and the bright celebrations

leaping long

into some far after...

.

stay pure

until your pure rest,

your silence, and the unbinding...

of just what it was we felt, or knew,

we once were - full -

and so alive - to one other.

so hey,

are we moving forwards?

'progress'...

or retreating...

further -

down - or far away -

from the sweet love

and personally-enabled glory

which rises up and is gleaned

like honey with the milk -

of what we take directly

and give back

to our lands; our worlds

together

thru greener insight, wisdom -

more foraging and finding -

fresh spice

for some inner, deeper harmony

which can flow; which _exists_...

.

our environments;

they rule:

they are - _really_ - all we have

to work with, moving you,

still -

along these lines

i'd say -

how they move us all

(so strangely)

shape us

into circles, ever-shifting:

decreasing

outbursts overturning

breaking, reaching

back

into new lines

across the sand

and in this wind  

_you'll find the way..._

…

..

.

(2024)  
  
.

.

### don't remember me in words

.

don't remember me  
In frozen words  
or crafty speech  
when I am dead.  
i should be far - removed -  
from those particular views, _your_ quotes or judgements passed,  
smart summaries aired to others  
in closed comfort -  
cute queries into how I lived or who I was  
or seemed to be...

.  
  
i shall be spent  
and so will you at the end  
of this energy  
we carry from the blend of soup  
we steamed out of,  
unfurled into a world of power  
seeking drink and fruit - more power -  
trying for some good, or turning bad  
or breaking bad  
it is all being spent, you know it,  
in the name of many things.

.  
  
but if we stumbled thru real times  
and evolved together -  
when we were free and needy -  
closer to the soil -  
then think of these  
between obsessive work,  
survival and the riding on the storm  
of Life you must right now  
hide or try to rise from,  
fearful of the quick missstep  
or bracing to adore  
a sleepier fall.

.  
  
we are all connected so it hardly matters  
if we were kings or robbers  
we were just kids  
sticking together  
pushing out at the surroundings  
pushing in upon us  
where the endings to our smoking stories all seem sad...  
  
but try to judge yourself -  
from the world's view:  
'you' picked its many apples  
'you' scattered seeds,  
fed the soil, 'you' breathed  
and maybe had the chance to love  
and rut  
now keep on talking, mourning,  
making noises in the trees.  
  
Overall  
we seek a space to rule, belong,  
feel fine - about ourselves -  
and love this world  
as dearly beloved  
gentle elephants -  
their great, dim shapes -  
get hustled away  
but still gather back, in the dark,  
to softly tread and sway -  
lower and bow their heads -  
if not for me  
then for it all...  
  
before...  
our next strange calling  
distracts us away; incites us out  
to cry or laugh some more  
to serve and play again -  
raise our rackets to the bouncing ball of this shared being  
in this firey, flowing energy game...  
  
  
where words are more ways to hold on  
and to handle - to control another;  
to pour over what is being poured out  
anyway -  
you should not need  
to pour them over me -  
  
'_just get yourself free..._'  
  
.

.

.

(2024)  
  
  
  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/55339af0c834612f1ed675123b455810.jpg)

  

* * *

  

Extra note…
-----------

  

![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/3cdaa32a0c4e1fdeda3195038230279b.jpg)

  
Thanks for reading. More poems can be ‘found’ online or off, evolving or devolving, including ‘At the Far Tor - Poems etc. from South Devon’, ’Across the Shore’ (an NFT collectible poem catalogue) plus earlier work ‘Gathered on This Beach’.

  

*   Ade mc @ Ade’s Press 2023.
    
    \[2024: Additional (final!) poems were added to this collection to mark this full release as NFT.\]  
      
    

[Collect](https://paragraph.xyz/@adespress/hqTO6as6tEZmKSF8G5Dx)

  

  
**Note**: No chatbots were used at all, for _any_ of the collections here at Ade's Press.  
I will always specify if/where used.  
I am currently working on training a chatbot with most of them, as an experiment to see what it can produce. You can access and test drive this work in progress, '[Ades-FreeVerse](https://poe.com/Ades-FreeVerse-4o)' via Poe, using Chat-GPT etc. All outputs 'used' must include a credit to Ade's Press.

Stand by for an update and list of all chatbots I'm working on, plus prompt ideas, in another post.

---

*Originally published on [Ade's Press](https://paragraph.com/@adespress/in-ash-on-the-sand)*
