# The Start.

**Published by:** [Karol](https://paragraph.com/@karol/)
**Published on:** 2023-01-20
**URL:** https://paragraph.com/@karol/the-start

## Content

My first (baby) step in web3 - I salute you! Why The Start? 2023 is the first year that I will not be “busy”. Had this problem of not leaving time for me to think, I was always engaging in activities, going to university courses, working at the same time to pay my studies, having a toxic friend environment grabbing my energy and optimismt completely for more than 2 years. So I decided this needed to stop. Graduating from university was the first step.. and done. I remember pain at the begining, realising an engineering degree was more difficult than I expected. I stopped volunteering after more than 6 years doing stuff for others. Finished the toxicity with some people by distancing myself. I needed it. Everything had to be put aside and closed before january. I needed to get back my mental wellbeing and physical health. I had forgotten about me. After 3 months, how am I? Starting to feel better, remembering I can do this and fighting against distractions. Today is 20/01/2023 - 3 days ago I again started using too much my phone and had the need to download Instagram again, twice. I forced myself not to do it, I was so bored my body asked for more distractions. I am proud I didn’t downloaded it back. I ate some rubbish food as in my worse mental health periods. But stopped too after some minutes when I realized I am fightning against all of that. The next day I scrolled through Linkedin and found this quote: “ You are not bored. You are just distracted. “ It hitted me. Threw the phone and got my shit together - (again). Efficient work, gym, pauses to be with myself etc. Now I am in search of the energy the apps take from me, in search of who I am, in search of who i want to become, in search of how to stop people pleasing and be myself completely. I didn’t even know writing this would make me feel so relieved, I have never written a blog post before. I am feeling so many things lately, I want myself not to stop the feeling from flowing, i want to be a whole conscious human and experience life. Improve, be ambitious and take care of me. Me. me. me… I know i can sound an egoistic person, but I promise I am not. I am fed up of taking too much care of everybody except of me. This is it. The Start. My Start. My Self. At the end if I am whole I will be able to be better for the rest , maybe? We will see and I will try to update. Not promising anything. Take care. Karol

## Publication Information

- [Karol](https://paragraph.com/@karol/): Publication homepage
- [All Posts](https://paragraph.com/@karol/): More posts from this publication
- [RSS Feed](https://api.paragraph.com/blogs/rss/@karol): Subscribe to updates