# Willing Spirit *Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.* By [Reborn Jem](https://paragraph.com/@rebornjem) · 2025-12-18 faith, renewal, meditation, discipline, obedience, hyvọng, christianliving, spiritualgrowthjourney, dailypractice, christianmeditation --- ### Psalm 51:10–12 (NIV) > 10 Create in me a pure heart, O God, > and renew a steadfast spirit within me. > 11 Do not cast me from your presence > or take your Holy Spirit from me. > 12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation > and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. * * * Today’s scripture reading is a cry for healing. Multiple times a day, impure thoughts run through our minds. Sin happens both knowingly and unknowingly. On our own, we can never overcome it. That’s why we need to draw strength from God. Jesus gave us the Holy Spirit to guide us in how God wants us to live — prompting us toward purity and helping us remain steadfast in Him. Even when the going gets tough, we pray that God keeps us in His presence. The line that speaks most deeply to me today is verse 12. Throughout 2025, I think I lost the _joy of salvation_, and that loss slowly led me into a hole of inactivity. I watched a video this morning talking about how many people are losing faith because the world keeps preaching hopelessness — that everything is meaningless. That’s why the idea of a _willing spirit_ matters so much. We need a spirit willing to trust God and to do what He asks of us. Salvation by grace is chapter one of our story. By God’s grace — through Jesus — we are undeservingly saved. But only if we are willing to believe. Chapter two is written if we are willing to depend on God to sustain us, even when everything feels impossible. He carries us through life on His terms. That’s what I’m praying for today. * * * ### Meditation Reflections This morning, while still in bed, I tried to focus on my breath — but it didn’t work. So I got up and moved to my chair to start my sit properly. During the preparation, I told myself: _the goal is simply to spend time with the breath God has given me._ I need to be willing to give God this time. He gave me 24 hours in a day — what is 47 minutes with Him? With that intention, I started my sit. Throughout the sit, I kept wanting to give up and end early. The same line kept returning: _“Give God His time.”_ This went on until the 36-minute mark, when I consciously decided to end the sit — the exact same duration as yesterday. The first part felt focused; the latter part was a struggle to stay present. I kept reminding myself that none of my tasks were so urgent that they couldn’t wait another half hour. That thought almost pulled me into another negative spiral. But the balance here is this: I _did_ complete 36 minutes. Sitting. Two days in a row. Compared to just days ago, when I nearly didn’t sit at all, that matters. Celebrate the wins. Turn situations toward the positive while still acknowledging the struggle. I need to return to the balanced frame of mind I used to have. I didn’t run yesterday. I also didn’t do my night sit. Writing this here is a gentle nudge to myself. The Holy Spirit is prompting me to go for a run right after finishing this — so I will. Another thought that came during meditation: if I’m not asleep by 11 PM, I’ll start a half-hour night sit. If sleepiness comes, I’ll end it and head to bed. That’s the plan starting today. * * * ### Crypto Journal I sold **MINER** and **KERMIT** yesterday after they pumped, locking in profits. I rotated into SOL, which then tanked after a scam pump — so that happened. That said, I still believe the purpose of trading memecoins is to accumulate more SOL, so I’m okay with short-term price fluctuations. Right now, I’m only holding **NOTHING**. I’ll be watching for new coins gaining attention today. After the scam pump, fear is creeping back into the market. Let’s see what coins God brings to my attention. * * * ### Twitter Building ![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/49583e01095b17eca7b86335aeeccaa2fc24f06bbfe4e0ce39b59320c2c4bc87.png) Growth on X has slowed slightly, but I had to include this screenshot because of the numbers: **7344 / 3744**. 7 → insight, research, deep thinking 3 → communication, expression, creativity 44 → structure, discipline, building something that lasts Ideas first. Then deep thinking. Then execution. Right now, my focus is building my account while continuing to research projects. Execution is happening. The deeper thinking is still around what kind of content I want to put out — it needs to be engaging and genuinely mine. For now, I’ll keep testing new projects and enjoying the process of learning in the crypto space. Yesterday, I spent time testing **HeyElsaAI**, which feels like a ChatGPT for crypto. It works smoothly, and transactions are easy to execute. I haven’t done a deep dive yet, but I plan to use it for daily trades and bridging. There are already over 4,000 people in their Discord. I’m curious to see how the project develops. * * * It looks like rain, but I still feel the need to go for a run. I’ll do a short one, then get back to research and an evening meeting. I’m willing to use the time God gives me well. Thank you, Lord, for leading me down this path. Bless me as I do my best to proclaim Your good news to all who will listen. In You I trust. * * * ### Vietnamese Phrase of the Day 🇻🇳 **Is it raining?** _Có mưa không?_ * * * If this spoke to you, consider subscribing to follow along my journey of **faith, meditation, rebuilding, and crypto** — one day at a time. Your support truly means more than you know. ❤ --- *Originally published on [Reborn Jem](https://paragraph.com/@rebornjem/willing-spirit)*