# 6:39 PM

By [robertldaltoniii](https://paragraph.com/@robertldaltoniii) · 2025-01-16

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the process in the mind that occurs is this:

they tell me not to do something like stare at a face

i then go into this mode where im fighting these people(the captors) who are telling me not to do something/to not do this thing

someone in my mind tells me not to do something

doing this is a feeling of revenge

the motive then blurs into this level of disdain

they then ask me a question during this

they ask me do you want to do this

the answer is then blurred because the feeling of doing is a feeling of something that i "want" to do

and then my ocd where i **end up thinking of things that have no resolution** **compulsively occurs**

and then i loop until i exit these memories are now scars

**\*To add I have no history of schizophrenia or hearing voices in my head**

They also do one where they ask me if i like something and then i stare and then it feels weird

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*Originally published on [robertldaltoniii](https://paragraph.com/@robertldaltoniii/6-39-pm)*