# PRE-OWNED

**Published by:** [The Late Bloomin’ Author](https://paragraph.com/@tlba/)
**Published on:** 2023-01-13
**Categories:** satire, humor, gender, stepford wives, dystopian
**URL:** https://paragraph.com/@tlba/pre-owned

## Content

Buy our drawers and the world is Yours; or, pay large sums to temporarily bind your feet. Their price could pay for at least 10 to eat. Alcohol not included. No substitutions. It’s all or nothing these days aint it? More than a months’ rent, worn once. That’s what the sign should say in the upscale second hand shop with its plethora of pre-owned wares, stocked by those with more money and cents than You will ever have, and they still can’t just give it away once they’re done with it. Is there a market for expensive pre-owned thongs? I’m going to go with probably yes! Cheap bitches; but then there’s that old saying that “you don’t get rich by giving it away” and no one can remember who said that, but everyone nods in agreement anyway. Even the have nots, along with the never will haves because they keep voting against their best interests, whatever those are.Besides, it costs money to have interests; and let’s not forget them luxury beliefs. Some of those are real fancy. Why I do declare that I can just declare I’m a Member of the opposite sex, and even though I lack Membership, and simply because I feel like it! Is this true? Then I’m coming for my rightful paycheck—and you can make that retroactive. I’m in my 60s. You do the math.What’s that? You didn’t mean it like that? Are you sure? Then You can suck my imaginary one. It’s all starting to sound like the plot of a dystopian novel. Where the women are erasable. Men interchangeable. Imagine a remake of The Stepford Wives revealing a world where the men are still men, and the women compete with those other women who were born without vaginas. You’ve come a long way baby. What if…It’s a man’s world after all…it’s a….All together now…!

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