Let this be your gentle hand on guiding you through the process.

The concept of a family is at the core of one’s conditioning. Society wants to make sure everyone loves their family to maintain itself.

I will interfere here and state that there is nothing wrong with this, except ‘loving one’s family’ cannot be done forcefully, because it will end up causing more turmoil.

Forced compassion isn’t compassion. Forced feelings lead to more discord between individuals, and destroy a peaceful household.

The concept of marriage is yet another ploy of society. In nature, nobody ‘marries’ one another. Again, this isn’t to say marriage is meaningless, but to illuminate the false constructs society has sold you on.

Because these chases are deemed mandatory to the individual, we spend our lifetimes fixated on them without examining what they are good for.

Seeing through concepts is a game of chess with yourself.

Except the end goal is achieved when both sides have vanished, and the board lies empty.

Happiness does exist, but it’s on the other side of voluntary pain.

We act in the world without reflecting, then to avoid examining our missteps, we try to cover up our emotions with more actions.

To be free of this vicious cycle, one must step on the brakes and plunge deep within oneself to retain his childhood freedom he once had.

Examination is painful, lack of examination is painful compounded over the time spent unexamined. Choose carefully.

Happiness is always within reach, and never further than the next moment.

Putting yourself down in hopes for attention from others.

Why do people want attention from others?

Because taking accountability for your own issues is hard.

Why is that hard?

Because people do not want change, comfort is easy.

Is there anything wrong with this?

No, there is no right or wrong.

What is the cost of self-deprecation?

Running in circles, and finding no solutions.

If one is okay with this, he will keep doing it.

Why do you want to be certain?

So I could feel like I am in control.

Why do you want to be in control?

Because feeling uncertain is scary.

What’s so scary about being uncertain?

Because you don’t know what’s gonna happen next.

So, fear?

Yes, I guess you are right.

Fear of things not going your way.

Yes.

Why do you want things to go your way? And how do you know what’s best for you, anyways?

I’ve never thought about it like that.

You will get away with what you can allow yourself to get away with.

Something one hides from other people.

Why hide anything?

Not to be judged by others.

Why not?

It might be hurtful.

So?

It causes pain.

What causes pain?

Another person’s words hitting an unexamined iceberg of thoughts and emotion.

Is there any way out?

Only if you are willing to dig deep.

Somewhere in the world, his parents start forcing him to do stuff he doesn’t really want to do.

Teachings, preachings, knowledge, warnings.

If the baby doesn’t listen, he gets condemned by all around him.

And so he goes on, questioning everything, but ‘learning the ropes of life’.

Eventually he goes to school, and has to sit there ‘learning’.

Eventually he goes to college, and has to sit there ‘studying’.

Eventually he goes to work, and has to sit there ‘working’.

Eventually he goes to his family, and has to sit there ‘suffering’.

Eventually he goes to a retirement home, and has to sit there ‘reminiscing’.

For what?

Society's condemn upon the individual.

How can I get rid of being ashamed?

Why do you want not to feel ashamed?

So I could be myself.

Why do you want to be yourself?

So I could be truthful.

Why do you want to be truthful?

So that I can present myself to society truthfully.

Why do you want to ‘present' yourself?

Looking for an answer is itself not being yourself.

What do you mean?

Why argue about anything?

To prove a point.

Why do you want to prove a point?

To feel right.

Why do you want to feel right?

To maintain my beliefs.

Why maintain your beliefs?

I’ve never thought about it that way, are there any alternatives?

Yes, understand the truth.

Is this any different?

Instead of proving other people wrong, prove yourself wrong, and you’ll never have to convince anyone right.

But I feel like I am right.

If you were right, an argument wouldn’t occur in the first place.

Helping someone see through their lies.

Why do you wanna do that?

It's the only way to help anyone.

What do you mean?

The only reason anyone isn't free is because each person has a goal.

What is a goal?

A carrot on a stick, keeping a human being chasing forever.

Sounds horrible.

There is no good or bad. It's just that if you want to help, you're gonna have to prove the carrot isn't real.

How can I do that?

Find out why first.

Why?

Only you can answer that.

They are fun.

Why are they fun?

This is a tough question to answer, but I have an inkling I know.

Is it because we like to break things down?

Break what down?

Children tend to like breaking things.

I liked breaking things too, it’s how I got here.

Here, where?

Everywhere, nowhere, pick your choice.

What is to be broken?

What you call yourself as you.

What is ‘me’?

A false identity of false beliefs reinforced with a lifetime of knowledge and inertia of emotion.

Is this bad? How do I get rid of this?

It’s nor good or bad, and you don’t have a choice.

Do different people have a choice?

You only have a ‘choice’ if you can suffer no longer.

I wish to be free of suffering, can you help me?

There is nothing I can do.

Nothing?

I can perhaps push one domino, and leave you.

Why do I want to be in control?

To achieve what you want?

Why achieve?

To get?

Why get?

There is nothing to get.

So I could walk in the world forthrightly, without being touched by judgment.

Why do you not want to be judged?

Because it is painful.

Why is it painful?

Because something within me doesn’t like it.

What is that?

Ego.

What is ego?

Identities, I think I see myself as.

Why do you need these?

So I could belong in the world.

And if you had no identities of yourself, would you be limited, or free?

Free.

Why do you want to belong, when freedom is at your fingertips?

Who says I want to?

The way you talk, the way you act, the way you speak.

How do you know all this?

Because I was just like you.

And did you find a way out?

I couldn't not find a way out.

What do you mean by this?

By abandoning the quests society wants you to be on, you can unravel your own stream.

How is this possible.

By seeing through the fruitless pursuits you have been sold on.

Like what?

Love, happiness, peace, freedom, enlightenment.

How does one ‘see through' these?

By knowing what they are not.

How does one get to this ‘knowing'?

By putting each one of these concepts under scrutiny.

Does this mean these things don't exist?

For practical reasons, it is foolish to believe them, because you will chase them for your entire life, and miss.

If you can afford to keep chasing, you will.

There is no choice.

Truth.

How do you know?

Why do you think people are drawn to take walks in nature?

To reflect on their life?

Why do they want to reflect?

Because deep within, there is a longing.

For what?

To return to the natural state of one’s existence.

What is the ‘natural state’?

It is who you were, before you became who you are.

How do you know?

You know it too, you’ve just buried it beneath your emotion.

Confidence is the lack of self-conflict and trust that you will say the truthful thing.

Does anyone have confidence?

People can try to fake it, but deep down, you can see through it.

Why is that so?

Because in every person there is a truth detector buried deep inside.

Where is this ‘truth detector’ located?

It can only be described on where it is not.

Where is it not?

It is not within the human mind.

Where else could it be?

Naming it would only put a false destination for you to reach.

How so?

If I describe a location, your mind will fixate on finding it.

Why is this incorrect?

I never said it was, it’s just that it keeps the mind chasing.

Is that not what it always does?

Correct.

Money gives you freedom.

“Materialistic pursuits give you freedom?”

No, but they allow for the pursuit of freedom.

“How so?”

If a man spends his entire life trying to make more money, how will he ever get to the truth of things.

“You’re assuming he wants to get to the truth.”

Everyone wants to get to the truth.

“How do you know this?”

The man working for money is trying to keep his head afloat.

“How does this relate to truth?”

By keeping his head afloat, does he ever enjoy life?

“What is enjoying life?”

Enjoying what life gives to you on a moment-to-moment basis.

“And this cannot be achieved without money?”

Truthfully, no. He will always go haywire to make money.

“What if that’s what he wants?”

He may say what he wants, but what is money, really?

“An asset?”

An asset to buy more time.

Truthfully, that’s how it should be. You never see arguments in nature.

“How is this possible?”

By having two parties without self-conflict.

“How do you get rid of self-conflict?”

By letting the other person understand what they seek is not what they truly want.

“What if they don’t agree?”

That happens if you put it bluntly to their face. Ask, inquire, understand.

“How is this different?”

It plants the seeds of truth within a human being.

“And everyone wants this?”

Yes, it is just that everyone seeks truth in the wrong places.

“But there is no right, or wrong?”

Sure, but people are craving for truth, why not show them the real thing?

“Why would you want to?”

You don’t have to want to want to do it.

“How do I stop wanting to do it?”

Why would you like to stop?

“So I could plant the seeds truthfully.”

Why do you want to be truthful?

“So I could truly help.”

https://mirror.xyz/albrechtvp.eth/3_zEElj8vUR0FLmqQLde1-yMx-oMANrhrAAOqsxRcic

Since I’ve re-read the previous one, and perhaps picked up on a few mishaps, I think it’s time for a revision.

So much of ‘knowing where to go’ is a pleasure chase.

We find activities, hobbies, people that excite us, and we go chasing the same experience. This always leads in a dead-end.

Not because it is right or wrong to do so, but because what inspired the initial engagement cannot be repeated by chasing it.

Inspired by concepts marketed to me, I set on a path for ‘happiness’, ‘life’s work’, ‘true love’, ‘passion’, ‘self-improvement’.

The truth is, these things didn’t get me anywhere.

What is the point of labeling experiences?

What is the point of trying to capture life’s greatest joys and turning them into mirages?

What is the point of putting a carrot on a stick for the masses to follow?

Labels aren’t bad, they help us communicate feelings, experiences, otherwise illusive.

It’s just that,

One who is serious about acquiring a desired state,

May re-examine the true value of a concept,

And come to the conclusion,

That he has been chasing ghosts his entire life.

Throughout the journey of life, I find times where I feel like I’ve reached a dead end.

Looking back, however, these moments seem crucial and even necessary. From the outside perspective, people rarely notice. You’ll figure it out, they say.

But why has no one figured it out from the start?

I mean, can one know where their best work lies since coming into the world? How do you cut the crap, and do what you will do best?

Your goals may or may not align with mine, but here’s what we can agree on.

Wasting time sucks.

Wouldn’t it be nice to stop overthinking and reach a place where you are having the most fun, and also making your best work? To find someone who you can rely on for the rest of your life? To start a business that fits your values perfectly?

(don’t worry, this isn’t a sales pitch)

Let’s look for an answer.

If we start examining some of the world’s most legendary people, we see:

Steve Jobs went to search for a guru in India before launching Apple;

Buddha reached enlightenment only after leaving the ascetics;

Isaac Newton extensively studied theology, yet his most famous contributions are in science and mathematics.

Before you ask, I don’t know why all the examples are connected with spirituality or religion.

Anyways,

Were they just wasting their time?

We can’t say for sure.

Jobs himself has a quote to live by:

“You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.”

Surprisingly, it’s true. Looking back at your past, it’s easy to pick a few data points and map them into a cohesive story. Oh, that cheeky narrative bias.

But which dots do we connect, exactly?

If you took your childhood motivations and combined them with current ones, you could get tons of different combinations. Why do some of them stick, and others, fall behind?

Perhaps it is because our values are constantly changing. We learn new ideas, and those ideas change our values. If a person started as a painter, then wanted to make more money, he may start a company.

Nothing about his core personality changed. It was only the value he put on money.

Unfortunately, I don’t have a better answer than Steve.

You can’t connect the dots looking forward.

But you can identify the wrong dots as fast as possible. When doing something new, it’s exciting for a short period of time. The breaking point lies at the end of the dopamine rush, though. Will you sustain it?

Naval Ravikant has a great quote on this (shocker):

If it entertains you now but will bore you someday, it’s a distraction. Keep looking.

Keep looking is probably the best advice you can get here.

Some activities just fit better.

That’s to say, what do you genuinely and authentically want to do?

But’s that’s a question for another day…

I’ll leave you with a Taoist story, that fits just right.

http://www.thechurning.net/there-are-no-opportunities-or-threats-the-parable-of-the-taoist-farmer/