Stop dumping your Umunna and your father's name in the dustbin.

Go and make your Umunna meeting digital if you're afraid of sitting with them.

Go and put their meeting online so that you can participate from USA, UK, etc and contribute from anywhere you are through computer or your smart phone.

Go and document your Ụmụnna meetings in case of tomorrow.

Make sure you're with your Ụmụnna anytime anyday.

Because any decision they make/take even out of ignorance "stands" and can affect you and your family.

From Ụmụnna you will know your relations.

From Ụmụnna you will know your traditions.

From Ụmụnna you will know your history.

From Ụmụnna you will know your age mates, your seniors and your juniors.

From Ụmụnna you will trace your father's inheritance.

From Ụmụnna you will trace your paternal relations and your maternal relations.

Your Eze/Igwe is from Ụmụnna,

Your PG is from Ụmụnna,

Your Governor is from Ụmụnna.

Ụmụnna is not evil, evil is everywhere.

Ụmụnna doesn't kill

Ụmụnna doesn't poison

(Evil men can be anywhere -- within your circle of friends or colleagues)

Your father is one of them and

your grand father was !

Does your father kill ?

Does your father poison ?

Because your Ụmụnna is your father and your father is your Ụmụnna.

Forget your money and your status,one day you must need your Ụmụnna.

Whatever you're doing with your

Ndị yard

Ndị club

Ndị line

Ndị friends

Ndị meeting

Ndị Church

Ndị School mates etc can never take the place of your ụmụnna. One day, you will look for these people and won't see them but your ụmụnna will always be there. Igbo na-ekwu okwu sị na ozu sibe isi, enyi ka nwanne alaa.

When you get to your village this August or anytime try and join your ụmụnna, at least you will get to know your relatives from there.

Teach your children asụsụ Igbo, the language of their Ụmụnna!

Jisike.

Chukwu Okike gozie anyi niile,

Be intentional about your people and don't ignore their gatherings and meetings point.

My name is #Alexdphenom I write to uplift and encourage

It was a pool party with naked girls.

And they were there.

Men who have achieved.

Money, power and fame.

Men in their prime who tell time to hold still since they have refused to age and it grudgingly obeys in detente and in temporaneous.

They dress young, they dance young, they act young.

They are current on all fronts.

Most of them married with children but mentally and emotionally single.

At this party they threw in a high brow residence in an exclusive neighbourhood in Ikoyi there was an abundance of food, drinks, drugs and real youth.

The youth came exclusively from the girls that were in attendance.

Girls in their late teens and early twenties.

Well spoken and extensively travelled.

Daughters of the materially blessed.

Read this to help your children now. Their safety is your choice.All of them students.

All of them naked.

Some were in the swimming pool, some at the bar, some danced under the cabana, others were hobnobing with the swimming trunks clad men at various places in the specially lit pool area that stood under the starry night sky.

And I sat with one of them.

She was caramel smooth, finely contoured, delicately featured and doe like.

She was twenty going on twenty one.

And a sophomore at Babcock university.

To every question I asked, she took a drag from the reefer in her hand, blow out the smoke through her mouth and nostrils, took a sip from her glass of Hennessey and coke on ice before she responded.

Her voice was sweet.

And her smile was rapturous.

"I heard students need permission to leave your school. How could you get out this late and stay overnight?"

"We have our ways."

"We?"

"Yeah all of us."

"From Babcock?"

"Not all. Some from Covenant, Redeemers, Madonna, ABUAD, Pan African and stuff."

"No unilag or UI?"

"They ain't boujee."

"Boujee?"

"Yeah. They are crass. Men like you guys don't want to roll with local cats like those right?"

I looked at her silently as she took a drag from her reef.

The aroma assailed it. It was caustic yet not aggravating.

"What's that?"

"Comorado."

"What's that?"

She laughed.

"It's good stuff. Hits you slowly and then makes you soar like superman."

I looked around and saw the girls doing one thing or another in their nudity.

She was staring at me.

"Is this your first party?"

I nodded.

"No wonder you are asking all these hang questions."

"Why do you do this?"

"I'm young. I need to live life before it becomes too serious and I have to be all grown up."

"But why the drugs?"

"Because."

"Because what?"

"Because this is how we roll. Everyone has their poison. If you are not on reef, you do codeine or cocaine or heroin or speed or AZT or ecstasy or royfenol or fentanyl or meth or oxy or worst case you inhale glue and get your high."

I stared at her as she inhaled and exhaled languidly.

"Why the parties?"

"You get your hit for free here. You have fun. You make good money."

"But for you to attend those schools you must be rich."

"My parents are not me."

"But they give you money."

"They pay the tuition and all. Not like they can give me a million in cash."

"Do you get a million here?"

"Well two or three parties can make me that."

"Aren't you afraid of running into your Dad at places like this?"

"Naaaa... my dad is too square and busy but even if he is not then it is his problem after all he came here for what I came here for so he can't tell me nothing."

I fell silent and watched her inhale and exhale smoke.

"But you know, your folks put you in schools like that to protect you?"

"Too protect me?"

"Yes."

"They are too busy to even bother."

"No they are not."

"Yes they are. They think the school will be both my teachers and my parents."

"I think they are just worried about you getting corrupted."

"I was balling like this under their nose and they didn't even notice. Funny thing is that even the innocent Jane get influenced in school, so what was the use of all the headache of keeping us locked up in all these secondary schools that front as universities."

"They did it out of love and with the belief that those schools are way better than the public ones."

"Well they fucked up."

"Fucked up?"

"Is this an interview or what?"

"No, I am just intrigued."

"And I am horny."

I fell silent.

She dragged, exhaled, took a drink from her glass, sucked on one of the ice cubes in her mouth and asked in a whisper.

"Are you going to do anything about it?"

-----------------------------

The best time to do core parenting is between ages 0-12. You simply cannot afford to be too busy at this stage. Schools, nannies, extra murals cannot replace core parenting at this point. If you are absent in your child's life at this stage, be sure someone else is shaping your child's worldview .

At 12, a child's curiosities are set. And they spend their teenage years exploring those curiosities and fantasies and experimenting with their identities.

If you attempt core parenting in teenage years, you will meet a brick wall and you might end up with a fractious relationship with your teen.

Your best mode as a parent of a teenager is to "befriend" them. At this stage, you can't take anything for granted you will have to earn their trust. Seek to influence them not control at this point. They will resist control but will respond wonderfully to influence: yours or the streets.

Every Nigerian parent needs to read this. It's very important.

My name is #alexdphenom I write to uplift and encourage

Men, don't be deceived. One of the reasons why you are enjoying your marriage today is because you are able to provide for your family.

One of the reasons why your wife respects and submits to you is because you are able to provide for her needs.

It is not only because of love, because love is sometimes fickle and can't withstand the test of time.

When you lose your source of income and can't secure another one, you will discover that money can be more important than love in the marriage.

When some men came to my inbox to complain on how their wives' characters changed when they lost their jobs and when I go through the comments that followed the posts, I will just smile at most men's comments.

It showed what a lot of men don't know about women.

I can authoritatively tell you that most women will change their characters when their husbands lose their jobs and are unable to bring food to the table.

When I say, most women, I meant most women with little exceptions.

There are four stages you are most likely to pass through in the hands of your woman when you lose your job;

1. Sympathetic stage

2. Annoying stage

3. Irritating stage

4. Frustrating stage.

Listen Let me explain:

1. *SYMPATHETIC STAGE:*

When the news of you losing your job is broken out, your woman will feel pity and sympathy for you. She will remember what you have been doing in the past. She will remember how foodstuffs never lack at home, how you have been providing everything she asked for, and taking care of the family.

If she is a working class, she will start doing all these things without a complaint, she will double her respect for you, give you emotional and moral supports. All these she does because she believes that you will soon secure another job and everything will be fine. But inwardly, she has given you a *time frame* to secure a job and take over your responsibilities. If you are lucky to secure a job within the time frame she gave you, you will think that you have married an angel who supported you when you lost your job. But if you are not lucky, then welcome to another stage.

2. *ANNOYING STAGE:*

Here, everything you do will start annoying her. At this stage, she won't complain anything to you, but inwardly, she is burning and murmuring. She sees you using the toothpaste to brush your teeth, and she becomes annoyed on why you should press it from the middle instead of starting from the bottom. She sees you spreading your wet towel on the door, and she becomes annoyed on why you didn't take it outside where the sun will dry it. She returns home from work and sees you watching television, she becomes annoyed on why you should wait for her to come home and prepare food instead of preparing it in her absence even though you have been at home all through the day. This is a stage where she uses silent treatments to frustrate you. You will see her being angry without knowing why because she won't talk and all these things you are doing is never an issue when you were working. This is a stage where she is gradually reducing her respect for you. If you are not lucky to get a job in this stage, welcome to another stage...

3.*IRRITATING STAGE:*

You become irritating to her. Her love has turned to hatred. At this stage, she will burst out with every little provocation, She will start *comparing you with other men who lost jobs like you but have gotten another job.* She will stop allowing you to touch her or have sex with her, she will totally lose her respect, her affections and interest on you, she will interrupt you while talking, walk out on you, stop doing some home chores and start denying you some privileges. If you are not lucky to get a job in this stage, then welcome to another stage.

4.*FRUSTRATING STAGE:*

Here she will frustrate you out of the marriage. It is either you pack out from her or she packs out from you.

Your home will turn into a battlefield. She doesn't mind flirting with another man in your presence. She will see herself as a widow and sees you as a bundle of bad luck.

No woman will tolerate a jobless husband on the long run because they are not wired to be the breadwinners of the family. Though, the range at which a woman's transmission from one stage to the other differs.

Some can migrate from stage one to the last stage within 6 months, while some can take years, or even less than a month depending on her endurance level and the efforts you are making to secure another job. But the undebatable truth is that no woman will feed you and still submit to you on the long run.

*Can you see why you should protect your source of income by all means?_*

Your happiness, peace of mind, marriage success, and even long life depend on your ability to meet up with your responsibilities at home.

If you lost a job and your dream job is not forthcoming, look for a menial job that will enable you to go out in the morning and come home in the night to retain your dignity.

Don't be ashamed to do any legit job as long as it can put food on your table and May the Lord not test every family man with poverty so that you will not die before you die. Amen

My name is #alexdphenom I write to uplift and to encourage