Nowadays, monogamy is still a prevalent relationship pattern in most places in the world. The term monogamy refers to a relationship in which there is only one partner at a time, as opposed to multiple partners. Monogamy can be sexual or emotional, but it usually includes both elements. While unconventional relationships are becoming less taboo, they are not for everyone.

If you are not sure whether to practice a monogamous relationship, read our article to learn more. We will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of monogamous relationships, and compare them with non-monogamous relationships. You can make your own choice after reading the blog.

Want to explore more about monogamous relationship? Read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman on bookey!

Contents

· What Is a Monogamous Relationship?

· Monogamy Vs. Non-Monogamy

· 3 Advantages of Monogamous Relationships

· 3 Disadvantages of Monogamous Relationships

· Is a Monogamous Relationship Right for You?

· What Is a Monogamous Relationship?

When two people have a monogamous relationship, they live together in a closed partnership and they are physically and emotionally faithful to each other. Consequently, romantic attachments and sexual attachments to third people are completely excluded. Can this work permanently, then?

Before the 1970s, there was no (official) alternative to monogamy. Marriage was believed to last forever. Divorced couples, especially divorced women, were still stigmatized. It is no longer the case that anyone who indulges outside of marriage is a divorcer.

Nowadays, alternative forms of relationships are enjoying greater social acceptance. However, most people still prefer serial, monogamous relationships.

The monogamous partnership is not considered the classic form of relationship everywhere in the world. It is particularly prevalent in Western culture. Many primitive peoples, on the other hand, live in polygamous partnerships. There, as in the west, this is just as widely accepted and prevalent as here is the monogamous relationship.

· Monogamy Vs. Non-Monogamy

Essentially, non-monogamy is the opposite of monogamy; it means that there is no exclusivity in the relationship, either emotionally or sexually. Having more than one romantic or sexual partner at the same time is known as ethical, or consensual, nonmonogamy (ENM). There are no secrets or going behind backs, so it's not cheating; it's an intentional part of the relationship.

ENMs and other kinds of open relationships are becoming more popular as more and more people become aware of them through social media, news, and other means.

While ENM is one approach to non-monogamous relationships, it is not the only one.

The following types of non-monogamous relationships are also possible:

Ø Polyamory:

When you have more than one romantic and/or sexual relationship at the same time, usually there is an emotional component, so it's like having multiple intimate relationships.

Ø Open Relationship:

Non-exclusive relationships fall under this umbrella term. The primary relationship is kept as the priority in open relationships, in which each partner is permitted to have sex with other people under certain conditions and with specific limitations.

Ø Triad:

A triple relationship is also known as a throuple and is usually considered a form of polyamory.

Ø Relationship Anarchy:

Any rules, expectations, or norms other than those established by the people involved are rejected.

Ø Monogamish:

A relationship that is mostly monogamous but occasionally open to extramarital relations. It tends to be more recreational as opposed to a more committed, romantic, or emotional relationship like polyamory.

Ø Situationship:

Relationship without defining or labeling itself as a relationship. A situationship lacks commitment and expectations.

· 3 Advantages of Monogamous Relationships

It is your decision alone to decide whether monogamy is the right relationship concept for you. However, it makes sense to consider the pros and cons of monogamous relationships in detail.

1. safety

Humans have a strong need for security. This is rooted in prehistoric times, when loners had a hard time surviving. A monogamous relationship fulfills this basic need. It is rewarding to have a reliable and loyal partner in a monogamous relationship.

2. loyalty

There is a high value placed on fidelity within a monogamous relationship. If you value sexual fidelity highly, you can find a monogamous relationship to meet your needs. Where cheating begins, however, can be subject to interpretation! While some only speak of a fling during sex, for others, the tolerance limit has already been exceeded if your partner simply mentally fancies someone else.

A Parship study has identified the most common reasons people commit a fling, even though they actually (would like to) live monogamously.

3. consistency

A monogamous relationship is synonymous with permanence for most couples. You plan the future together, which increases security. An uncertain future often stirs up fears, so monogamy contributes significantly to mental health.

· 3 Disadvantages of Monogamous Relationships

1. Limited self-development

Monogamous relationships entail constant compromise. For some people, this can impair their self-development since they always have someone else to think about. The demands of a monogamous relationship can also be quite high, making it easier to lose sight of their own needs.

2. side jump danger

It is unrealistic to find only one person sexually attractive throughout your life. Monogamy, however, requires fidelity without exception. If the love life with the partner does not develop as desired, the opportunity for a fling may only be a matter of time before it is seized. Both parties are left with feelings of disappointment and guilt if this happens.

3. Unmet expectations that lead to disappointment

It is hard to imagine a relationship that sets such a high (moral) bar as monogamy. Monogamous relationships are associated with harmony, dreams of marriage and starting families. Till death do us part... However, perfect relationships do not exist. The expectation of permanent sunshine and perfection is destined to disappoint.

· Is a Monogamous Relationship Right for You?

To answer this question, you should examine what your desires are in relationships and where those desires originate.

Our ideas are shaped by the cultures, families, and relationships we grew up in, and we are social creatures. Monogamy can be tricky because we live in a heteronormative monogamous culture, where every love song and every movie tells us that we are all connected.

For that reason, you will have to dig deep to uncover your own authentic desires, independent of what others expect from you.

To help you begin your research, here are a few things to consider.

Monogamy might be chosen for the following reasons:

- Juggling many partners is not your style; you prefer focusing on one person at a time.

- Feeling special and prioritized by your partner is something you enjoy.

- Limited time or limited energy makes it difficult for you to manage many relationships at once.

- Having just one relationship to nurture is convenient for you.

- It is easier to build relationships with one partner than many.

- Your life feels full with one partner; you're not interested in adding new people or important connections.

- Jealousy is something you prefer to minimize.

- It's comfortable and familiar.

- You value it because it's part of your faith or culture.

- Your partner prefers monogamy, and you're happy to comply.

- It's just what feels good to you!

Here are some signs that monogamy might not be right for you:

- The idea of having many intimate connections at once appeals to you.

- Even when you're in a relationship, you find yourself attracted to other people.

- Although you love your partner and have a healthy relationship with them, monogamy can sometimes feel limiting or constricting.

- Even when you loved and felt happy with your partner, you cheated in monogamous relationships in the past.

- When you're single, you miss out on spontaneity and flirtatious energy in social settings.

- Having several different kinds of relationships to meet all your needs would benefit you since they fulfill different needs for you.

- If your partner is with someone else, you don't mind.

- You don't have a jealous streak, or at least you can handle it level-headedly.

- Even if you're dating another person, you'll want to get to know interesting people who enter your life.

- When you love and care for multiple people at the same time, you feel capable.

- It's enjoyable to have sexual experiences with new partners regularly, but long-term commitment and a romantic relationship are important to you.

Related reading: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman