I didn’t set any resolutions for 2025. I just had 2 main goals: move to a new city and get a job. I went through many phases this year: isolation, enlightenment, transformation and answered prayers. I will write vaguely but still try to communicate what each of these phases felt like. Enjoy.

P.S. AI was not used to write this post.

Isolation

From January to mid-July, I lived in an apartment far away from the buzz and liveliness of the city, so to speak.

I’ve never really had an issue with being by myself, so I didn’t think much of it until I began to experience horrible network connections and very scarce electricity. Needless to say, I was in a village.

I am an optimist (borderline delusional but I’ve found that it’s the best way to live), so I quickly looked for the bright side.

Offline, I related with the most amazing people. I laughed hard, got annoyed and had the time of my life with them. I smile hard each time I think of them.

It was also at this time that I was introduced to Farcaster, a decentralised social network. On the few occasions that I had an internet connection, I would connect with people there. I met people who have now impacted my life greatly. It was (still is) a gold mine of wonderful connections and amazing experiences for me.

I also got into other novel activities (for me) like learning to draw, listening to classical music, scriptwriting and observing people when I went on solo ice-cream dates so I could write stories about them. Reminds me of my incomplete story drafts *yikes*

Enlightenment

I also took to reading biographies and stories of great people, and during my research on one of those days, I came across The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. From then on, my life changed. My. Whole. Life.

This harmless looking book rocked my whole world. It changed my psyche. It refined my views on spirituality, creativity, God, confidence, serendipity, and how to actually be someone who creates things. I went to deep levels spiritually and psychologically because of this book.

It was the therapy I didn’t know I needed. I learnt about morning pages and artist dates. I forgave people I didn’t know I hadn’t forgiven. My whimsy returned. I fell in love with life all over again. I returned to my hobbies from when I was a child. I began noticing beauty in the mundane. I remember telling my brothers once that I felt so light.

I believe God sent that book to me at that point in my life for a reason (I think I know why). I am a changed woman I tell you.

Everyone is an artist because we all create things so yes, this book is for you (if you haven’t read it of course)

Transformation

As I enthused in the last phase, I was (and still am) transformed. I finally had the courage to take the steps I had been too terrified to take.

Firstly, on August 3rd, 2025, I moved to Lagos. To you it may seem not big of a deal. But to me, an ex-anxiety-ridden young woman, this was a big deal.

One of the things I learnt in my isolation & enlightenment phase was God’s providence. I am convinced that when God wants something to happen, the whole world and the people in it will evolve and move to make it happen, no matter how impossible it may seem.

Answered Prayers

Coming to Lagos was quite underwhelming and disappointing at first. It took some time to adjust mentally (about 3 months). I was still unemployed and I wanted to change churches (for the second time in my life).

These 2 things occupied my mind and almost made me spiral. I prayed and believed for it and the answers came.

In October, I joined the CCI community, and I got a job I didn’t know would be a good fit for me, in a way only God could arrange, with the best colleagues ever.

I pray to never ever forget the beatitudes, lessons and wisdom 2025 imparted to me.

It’s 1:32 am, Friday 12th December, and I’m writing this in my notes app, still in awe of God and everything that He made happen this year. I am immensely grateful that it is impossible not to tear up each time I think about it. I am deeply grateful.

I pray you get to know and fully grasp the simplicity yet exceeding great wisdom, beauty, grace, mercy, love, in short, the fullness of the Almighty God. He truly is the only true God and the Answer to anything.

2025 has been a blast. 2026 will be even greater!

🫰

I have been devastated since Friday about the fact that my passion must either be commercialised using a sustainable model or must be assisted with a stable source of income.

“How did you not know this and how have you lasted this long?” You may ask.

Well, in March 2025, I made the silly decision of having Farcaster’s weekly reward as my major source of income. Crazy, I know. It worked because the USD is stronger than the NGN by a margin of 1:1500. My standard of living increased because of the rewards, I tell you.

"What changed?" You may ask again. The Farcaster algorithm, my move to an expensive city (Lagos) and some parts of my frontal lobe.

I earned $10 on the last FC rewards payout day. I was surprised because I haven’t earned that in a long time. I waved it off as a consequence of my laissez-fair attitude that week in regards to posting on FC. I resolved to get more involved the following week. As soon as the timer for the following week started, I picked up my phone and willed myself to post something interesting but I came up with nothing.

I dropped my phone out of frustration, looked at the ceiling and asked myself if that was how I wanted to live for the rest of my life. I eventually came up with some good post ideas and by Friday morning, I was feeling good until I decided to check my score on the leaderboard, iykyk.

With that, my mood dropped to the bottom of the mood scale. The bottom being a myriad of negative emotions — anger, depression, anxiety, fear. I was thinking of how I will have to go back to the job market and going back to the job market means that I have to build a brand to show proof of knowledge, experience and humanity. Going back means multiple job applications and hoping and waiting. Going back means I made a silly and childish decision to focus on my passion. I think that’s what annoys me the most; the fact that I’m still making silly decisions regarding my career path even as a 25-year-old.

Anyways, I’m done crashing out. I have learnt my lesson for the 100th time. I have returned to the job market and I’m ready to do what it takes to be the best community manager. I chose community management because I admire healthy communities. Community building done right is always a beautiful sight to behold. Case in point is Los Fomos on Farcaster. I love what they have built for themselves over the years.

To the neurodivergent people like me who want to just focus on their passions and don’t have rich parents who can finance them, my advice to you is to grow your finances first or side by side your passion (if you can multitask). Your passions won’t leave you. They have been given to you and will never leave you. You can do them during the weekends or at night. Your passion needs you to be healthy, at peace, not antsy, grounded.

Nevertheless, I am grateful for how my life has been so far. At the same time, I have to get serious and accept responsibility so it will get better.

Thank you for always taking the time to read my posts. Until next time, bye and ily 3>

My brothers are entry-level misogynists. I say this because the thoughts brewing in their heads are borrowed from social media and friends. They complain about imaginary girlfriends taking their imaginary money. At first, I was triggered and would argue until I was fuming.

One of their arguments was that women don’t have sufficient knowledge in their fields. I brought up women presidents, business leaders and sports women. Another argument was that women are “too emotional” (the typical argument). My logical retorts fell on deaf, obstinate ears. I was getting worried. How was I going to convince them that misogyny was more evil than the feminism their social media role models told them to hate?

A few days later, my brother asked me how something technical worked. I was about to answer then I paused, smiled and replied, “Well I’m a woman and I wouldn’t know anything about that”. It felt so good. He laughed. I laughed. Then I replied him.

Not too long after that day, my other brother needed money for something so he asked me. I smiled and replied, “I’m a woman. I can’t have that amount of money. Surely, as a man, you should be the one giving me money”. He smiled. I smiled and gave him the money he needed.

What happened thereafter was that they argued with less vigour. They began to see the folly in their bias against women.

Amidst all of this, I saw with glass-like clarity the evil that is misogyny. My mum has been present in my brothers’ lives since they were born. They saw her juggle office work, marriage, home management and us (the children) effectively until she resigned in 2015. Since 2015, her former workplace has not been able to find someone as capable as her.

She has sacrificed, denied herself of pleasures, gone against herself just so her husband and children will be happy always. She has kept late nights praying, defended us, and passed through life-threatening ordeals just so we can keep going forward in life. Only for her sons to develop a stupid bias against women that they are less than men and therefore deserve less than men.

When I try to defend feminism in front of misogynists, the usual attack is that feminists are wicked and hate men. Well, I’m here to tell you that that is misandry. Feminism advocates for the removal of legal and societal restrictions on women in order to bring about the equality of the sexes in all aspects of life, public and private.

Why is it so difficult to see women as human beings deserving of basic acts of humaneness? Why do you feel so threatened and triggered by the happiness and success of women? Where does all this hatred come from?

The things that make most women happy are not even life-threatening acts like wrestling. It’s beauty, literature, fashion, art, chocolate, etc. The fine things of life.

I asked a guy once to join me on an ice cream date and he snickered saying that licking ice cream is for girls. A 21-year-old man. I was baffled at his vast ignorance and self-inflicted pain. Misogynistic men love pain that much huh?

I feel sorry (and don’t) for misogynistic men. They will forever remain in the depths of bitterness and anguish all because they don’t want women to be happy. There is nothing good in misogyny.

This is a post about serendipity; a series of beautiful happenstance.

I didn't use to like animals because I was scared of them. I didn't think I would ever move to Lagos because on the news, Lagos is portrayed as a jungle where only barbaric humans can survive. But here we are. I love this stray cat. I'm enjoying life in Lagos. Lagos is good to me.

The Genesis

I moved out of my parents’ house at 22 in September 2022. I moved out because I needed to be my own person. It was scary but I knew I had to do it.

In the years that followed (2023-2025), I learnt a myriad of lessons. I didn't make much progress career-wise, but I made tremendous progress in knowing myself. It was in these years of solitude, meditation and hardship (I was broke because I was unemployed) that my true self was born.

The thought of moving to Lagos came to me on a sunny day in September of 2024. I held the thought for a while and let it go. Then the thought reappeared in my head, this time it kept staring at me, wide-eyed showing me all the possibilities. I couldn't say no to it but I also didn't know how to say yes to it. I didn't have the wherewithal. The thought didn't mind though. It stayed as if knowing it would cross over to my reality.

The Cogs On The Wheel Go Round And Round

The first cog to move was my friend from secondary school, who lives in Lagos, urging me to move over so I can be with her.

The next cog was Farcaster and the wonderful community I have come to love. I was able to save the weekly rewards to finance the move and my accommodation.

Then came the cog of reading The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. Looking back, reading this book and doing the exercises was a way of polishing or furnishing my true self like you would a newly built house.

The cog that followed was a screenwriting course in a reputable academy. I eventually turned it down because of the cost of commuting though.

Then the wheel began to go faster. I moved back to my parents’ house because the place I was staying in got flooded in the middle of the night. I gave away some of my old property. I booked the bus ticket to Lagos. And soon, my bags were packed and I was ready to move.

A New Beginning

I am lying on my bed in the room I share with that same friend from secondary school while typing this post because my laptop is with my boyfriend, as he just fixed the faulty storage drive.

I am about to step out to the kitchen and I will see the stray cat that lives in my compound. It loves me because I feed it. I am emotionally attached to it as well.

Life is going well. I am still hesitant about embracing my true identity of creative writing but I know my feet will grow strong in this path and I will bloom.

I look forward to the opportunities that will take me far in life. I look forward to the friends I will make. I look forward to the life I will have here. I'm excited.

Moreover, I believe that as long as you're valuable, you can stand out no matter where you are. Good examples include Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Tems and other exceptional Nigerians doing cool and great things.

However, because of Farcaster, I have been forced to reanalyse this belief of mine. Now, this post is not to put down the network. I am immensely grateful to be paid weekly for being active on a social network. In fact, Farcaster is the first and only app so far to pay me. Nevertheless, this payment will not stop me from calling out unfairness and perceived elitism.

Recently, Pichi wrote an extensive Paragraph post on the algo not being for you. She highlighted the unfairness which accounts that have been with Farcaster from the jump face on the leaderboard. This post is to agree with hers, but from the perspective of a member of the minority group of Farcaster.

I realised recently that I am now an OG albeit a noob OG. What I mean is if I engage with your posts, you will get high points but not as high as if OG accounts with sizeable following and influence engaged with your posts.

At first, I was happy. "I am now a high-quality user! Yay!". Then the happiness soon disappeared because I realised there's another side to the coin. OG accounts can give high points but if they are not affiliated with other OG accounts, they will not get high points in return.

This has always been the point gaining system on the Farcaster leaderboard. High-quality users have to engage with your posts before you are seen as a real person and, therefore, a high-quality user as well. I was fortunate to be introduced to the lively side of FC by an OG but not many people enjoy this benefit.

My first solution was to strive to be valuable. By "be valuable" I mean to create content that is either entertaining, informative or educative. Then I noticed another problem: Farcaster OG accounts are predominantly run by U.S. citizens or people deeply rooted in Western culture. It makes sense—Merkle is based in San Francisco. So, as a Nigerian, things often get lost in translation when trying to relate to these people.

In The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, he said the universal language is love and I believe it. I tried to relate to people by showing love. I have watched YouTube videos, listened to music, bought NFTs, and collected posts, but sometimes I feel like an impostor.

I have seen Nigerian users who are well-versed with Western culture gain influence on Farcaster faster than I can say Osadebamwen (it's a Nigerian name) while I'm just here looking like a deer caught in the headlights of being not Western enough.

It was then that I began to feel bad for being born a Nigerian and growing up in Nigeria. For the first time in my life, I might add. I finally understood the character Ifemelu in Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie when she moved to the US and understood the evil that is racism.

For the first time, I wanted to be a naturally blond 23 year old girl from California. I wanted to say I take coffee for breakfast. I wanted to own a pet dog and cat, and call them my children. I wanted to love house music. I wanted to say and get the Western humour. I wanted to tell tales of going to concerts or travelling on a whim. But I can't be or do any of these things.

I don't even want to get into the fact that I have to use a VPN to access websites and applications that are advertised as "decentralised". Is decentralisation not meant for Nigerians too?

Most Nigerians have given up hope on our leaders and even our country. People no longer look to the government for anything because they are a lost cause. Decentralisation seemed to me to be the solution to the problem of limited access to quality financial services and creator compensation. But sometimes, decentralisation feels like capitalism all over again.

This is the plight of the average member of the minority group of Farcaster. All I ask is for fairness. Let us all have equal influence on each other's accounts. Let the most valuable and not the most "Western-coded" win.

For years, I tried to answer this question definitively. Every time I thought I had the answer, it didn't take long for my expression of self to no longer match my carefully constructed answer.

I looked at others who lived loudly, boldly and confidently, with envy. What was wrong with me? Why couldn't I just figure myself out and live boldly like they did?

Then it hit me on a random weekday, who we are isn't definite. Human beings are not created to be one dimensional. We are multifaceted like our Creator. That's the fact and truth.

So who am I?

I am Ife. I will express myself as it comes to me. I will evolve constantly. I am not static.

I am.