I’ve spent the last few days dilly-dallying on whether or not to write this birthday essay, because the feelings I’ve been carrying aren’t the most… pleasant (or socially acceptable even), but in pain and in confusion, in ecstasy and elation, or most recently in isolation, I find solace in words. And so, I write, hoping to make sense of it all. Hopefully, it makes some sense to you as well.

So Far, Not So Great…

I’ve lost a lot, said goodbye to people and things that I never thought I would. That has hurt, like mad. I have learned that there aren’t enough seatbelts and airbags in the world to brace against some crashes. Mental preparation is a myth. I‘m sad, but not your regular garden-variety sadness. It’s an aching feeling bouncing between my neck and my chest, resisting my attempts to get it out and be done with it. You see, that’s the thing with grief. It’s not very concerned with your schedules and timetables. No, that would be too simple, too predictable, not painful enough. It much prefers a random, uncontrollable wave of pain and loss, on a random Tuesday afternoon, while you’re walking from class to buy buns at bbsf. Such is the way of the world. I’ve learned that tears and triumph are as constant as day and night.

Anyone who knows me well knows that I’m no stranger to the occasional (read: frequent) existential crisis, but I’ve never had so many aspects of my self and self-worth questioned in such a condensed space of time. Something about staring out the window on the morning of your paediatrics 1 exam, wondering about whether you are actually fit to be a medical student, does something to the mind of a man. I've wanted to cry, wanted to mourn emotional losses and pains, but I couldn't. There was simply no time. Too much to be done. Looking back, it’s so incredulous that at various points this year, I had to schedule my sulking time, for fear of falling behind on other things. I've learned that this was my anxiety, but in its third kit. Anxiety that sometimes has had me curled up in a ball on the floor, scratching at my already suspect heart, isolating for fear of "infecting" those around me. But sometimes, anxiety is pushing on despite it all. Not allowing yourself stop because you're convinced beyond all reasonable doubt that the world will collapse if you do.

I've struggled with, and had to come to terms with the fact that I might very likely be depressed this year, even as I consistently cross off my personal goals — high functioning, I think they call it. I must admit that it is creative in its manifestation and there always seems to be a nice combination of subtle and not-so-subtle signs here and there. As self-aware as I've always thought I am, I don't think I've deeped how much I've let go because of this. There are so many things I genuinely enjoyed that I've subconsciously let go of, and I haven't really allowed it to sink in because I now live this "get up and go, there's no time to slow down" life.

I find that dissociation has fast become a go-to coping mechanism when it all gets too much. There’s something quite alluring and addictive about reclusion, mindlessly scrolling through apps, listening to music, and playing games. Just numb. I'm realising that I sleep a lot, not just because I'm always tired, but also because I constantly need an escape. I’m aware that this isn’t the best way to deal with these things, and social interactions are essential (if not for anything, to increase my serendipity surface area), so I’m often at war with myself, fighting for the will to socialize, weird as that may sound.

On Societal Interactions…

I've always had some social awkwardness to my person. I've come to realize that I usually take a mechanical — almost robotic (see: scientific) approach to a lot of my social/interpersonal reactions. This means that I can be somehow in friendships sometimes and miss seemingly obvious social cues (some would say I can be 'willingly obtuse'). I try my best, but sometimes it's not enough. A lesson life seems to enjoy teaching me is that intentions don't always translate into actions, no matter how well-intentioned.

I've had to address some of my more self-destructive tendencies this year, particularly shrinking aspects of myself to make people more comfortable, to make them stay. It's always seemed much easier to take the slight dent of inconvenience than to risk confrontation and conflict. But that's the thing about tiny dents, they become craters if unchecked, and there have certainly been a few craters in my soul over the years. it has been a very hard road to walk sometimes. I've had to get comfortable with conflict. I've learned that sometimes you have to sit in it and be unencumbered by its awkwardness. I'm learning that for the most part, despite standing your ground, your people will remain your people in the end. I'm also learning that some people will leave regardless, and that's okay as well. I have had to face the fact that I am but myself, flawed, and seriously so, in more ways than I am willing to admit, but I’ve also learned that if I take responsibility for my wrongs and apologise sincerely, I am not banished to a torture chamber until you forgive me. I forgive myself in my own time, and you may (or may not) forgive me, in yours. More than anything, I am learning that I have to be kind to myself, to be truly kind to others. I want to be kind to everyone, but with certain boundaries. To be kind, but to be able to say no. To say I love you, but keep that shit away from me. To say I love you, but you cannot have this. No, I am uncomfortable with that. I want to be able to forgive myself as easily as I forgive others.

On Failure…

I have always had an interesting relationship with failure. One of the bigger after-effects of Gifted Kid syndrome (besides burnout, because omo Jesu Saanu) is an aversion to failure. Being good at most things growing up means you don’t often come in contact with failure, and by extension, resilience, which is apparently an important part of character development. What this means is that I usually quit things I’m not immediately good at. Unfortunately, sometimes the world does not care that you were a gifted kid. I’ve had to learn that there are things you will have to be bad at first, fail miserably and woefully (laughs in paediatrics), that you will not be able to run away from (except you want your mummy and your daddy to cry). And so, I’ve had to dig in, manufacture my own brand of resilience (cue the videos and pictures of Ore sleeping during nightwatch), and overcome a big setback. I’m hoping that this carries on into other areas of my life.

Despite the Chaos and Gloom…

There are things I am truly grateful for. I’m grateful to be alive, despite it all. I have had the hand of God show up for me in places and times that I have no explanation for. Things that have gone my way, even though there was absolutely no meritorious reason for it (Napoli boys know this all too well 😂). I still believe beyond reasonable doubt that I am serendipity’s poster child, because I have lucked out with some of the great people, things and places I have stumbled into by happenstance this past year, and I like that despite the almost constant turbulence, my mind allows me the occasional foray into the world to garner an experience or two.

One lesson I keep having to learn is to appreciate my little wins. There is always a temptation (which I fall for more often than not tbh) to simply heave a sigh of relief and keep it pushing, because you know, there’s more to be done; but I’m learning that sometimes it’s important to stop and smell the roses. Passing exams, getting published in the newspaper, getting my first paid speaking gig, presenting at an international conference, heck…even having a few more months as a bloody MS. These are good smelling roses, and I genuinely hope I can learn to appreciate them, even as I strive to plant and pick more.

More than most things, I’m grateful for my community. The people who have seen all of me, stressful as I can be, and decided to stick around. I like to think that I am a mosaic of the people around me, particularly those I have loved, and that makes me so grateful for them (perhaps I’ll write more on this soon). I cannot even begin to articulate the amount of mannerisms I have subconsciously picked up from the Captain, whom I am especially grateful for, in any and all forms. I am grateful for OC, for his existence, and his refusal to allow me to succumb to my worst tendencies. I am grateful for Keshinro, and how they remind me of my promise to be a big ball of love. I am grateful for Temi and her constantly bright outlook to life. For Adenuga, and his contagious spontaneity, Tobi, for always making me want to do better, Tolu mafo we’re going to Harvard 😂. What trenches have I not been through with Fadi? I’m more grateful to my boys for continually (and sometimes forcefully) pulling me from the deep end. There’s a lot more life to live. Don’t worry, everything go soft for boys soon. For everyone in my corner and in my heart, I am immensely grateful. I am learning to see that I am blessed in a myriad of ways, and as I grow older, I'm hoping that I spend more time existing in the reality of the not-so-terrible things in my life.

I do not have my future all figured out yet. somedays I’m so sure of where to go and what roads to take, and then suddenly I'm not. Mostly, I just want to make it to next Wednesday. And so, even in the depths of my despair, I can look to the smiles of those who love me and be grateful. For all the unpleasantness I've had to endure in the past year, I remember that when there is life, there is hope. And so, we go again and again and again. Perhaps someday, you’ll wake up in the midst of your dreams, and it won’t be so bad anymore.

Happy Birthday, Oreoluwa. May you never lose the sparkle in your eye.

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I’ve been reading some personal essays from the brilliant Elewa’s Substack, and while they’ve been great, they’ve chipped away at a part of my soul.

As I’ve grown ‘professionally’, I’ve found it harder to speak so plainly about the more fallible aspects of my life and personality. Maybe it feels like this because there are a lot more eyes, a lot more people accustomed to seeing me in a certain light. Maybe I’m afraid to let people see what’s really happening under the hood for fear of how they'll see me afterwards. Chai, look at me caring what other people think in big 2025.

Usually, in my newsletters, I would follow this train of thought and talk about how we can all do with a little doggedness and carefree attitude; how we need to persevere with the things that we want to do, regardless of what anyone thinks, as long as it’s not damaging any lives and property (unnecessarily). But you know that already, don’t you? Besides, today is not about you. It’s about me, so grab a chair and listennn, and then we can all talk later.

Lorokan, I’ve allowed that fear stifle one of my more effective coping mechanisms, so much so that I’ve been recently charged with ‘losing my writing identity’ (lool, yet another thing to add to the ever-growing list of things I’ve lost lately), and it couldn’t have come at a worse possible time.

I’ve always flirted with the idea of having a burner account. Don’t get me wrong, I have couple already (for other purposes which may or may not be nefarious), but I’ve always liked the idea of having one close enough to my identity that people know it’s me, but far enough that it’s contents are not brought into my more physical spaces or associated with my ‘professional’ persona. In other words, I’d like the license to fool and the license to do it expeditiously.

I’d very likely give my opinions on issues that’ll definitely get me dragged, like how smoothies are an abomination to mankind; but it’ll be an interesting change from silently agreeing with a twitter warrior who has been turned to tiger generator for tweeting something I said to my boys in hostel.

All this would’ve stayed wishful thinking, and at most words, on a Substack nobody would read, but Whatsapp had other plans, and amidst the frustration of having my messages wiped yet again because of some ‘error’ (I will actually stand naked in the market square and curse Zucky and his people soon), I decided to channel my inner Elewa and become a twitter menace for the weekend. No internalised screening and scrutinization process. No worrying about what my TL will think or say; just straight up fooling, and boy was it funn. If you thought I was going to show pictures of my twets, sorry, nothing for you. Go check my twitter out here

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Reputations aside, I can be pretty wound up (as my roommate would gladly attest), but you too, what is funny in this place? Tinubu is president, dollar is like 1600 and life is one long slew of hardships and disappointments. However, this weekend, I goofed, bantered, used the almighty format (iykyk, but also iyk it means you’re online too much, go and touch grass) and made a friend. Perhaps most importantly though, I shared some feelings that have been eating me up inside, and while I’m not looking for replies per se, it’s certainly nice to be able to scream into the void without overthinking it.

Will I keep this up, though? I don’t know tbh. Life is somehow, and things happen every day. I might want to go back to being serious Ore tomorrow, or I might start a cult. Nobody knows the future. What I do know, though, is that this mini-experiment has been a wake-up call for me (and fine, maybe for you too) to the fact that I need to express myself more, even if it is shamelessly. I think it’s the thing I’ve missed most about writing (and shouting in the woods in Iwo), that ability to let loose in self-expression and the jolt of life that comes with it. Exhilarating. And given where I am in life right now (more on that in later stories), exhilarating might be just what I need to get going again.

So here’s to a little fooling. On Twitter, with my mates, and in general. Because we all need a little more to laugh about, don’t we? (answer in the comments)

PS. In all your fooling, don’t be creepy or hateful. Don’t ruin the fun.

Maybe I’ll see you again soon, maybe not… Either way, though, you have…

All my love,

Oreoluwa.

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Like traditional financial markets, the cryptocurrency market follows a cyclical pattern consisting of four main phases: accumulation, uptrend (bull run), distribution, and downtrend (bear market). Each of these phases presents unique opportunities and risks.

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This phase occurs after a prolonged bear market when prices stabilize at low levels. Smart money—experienced investors and institutions—start accumulating assets at a discount, often while retail investors remain fearful and skeptical.

Characteristics of the accumulation phase:

• Low trading volume and minimal volatility

• Negative sentiment and lack of mainstream interest

• Media coverage is scarce or pessimistic

• The best time for long-term investors to buy

As institutional investors accumulate assets, the market begins to rise. Positive news, adoption, and growing investor confidence fuel this rally. Retail investors start entering the market, and euphoria builds up.

Characteristics of the uptrend phase:

• Increasing trading volume and price appreciation

• Positive media coverage and growing public interest

• FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) drives new investors to join

• Higher highs and higher lows in price movement

At the height of the bull market, prices reach unsustainable levels. Early investors and institutions start taking profits, distributing their holdings to latecomers. Market euphoria is at its peak, and new retail investors enter the market, expecting further gains.

Characteristics of the distribution phase:

• Extreme greed and optimism dominate sentiment

• Sharp price fluctuations with high volatility

• Smart money begins exiting the market

• Media hype and social media buzz reach all-time highs

After the market peak, prices start declining as selling pressure increases. Many investors, driven by panic, begin offloading their holdings at a loss. The market corrects, sometimes significantly, leading to a prolonged bearish period.

Characteristics of the downtrend phase:

• Sharp declines in price and market capitalization

• Negative media sentiment and declining investor interest

• Retail investors capitulate and sell at a loss

• Smart money prepares for the next accumulation phase

Understanding these phases is crucial for making strategic investment decisions. Here are some tips to help navigate the crypto market cycle:

• Buy during the accumulation phase when prices are low and sentiment is negative.

• Take profits during the distribution phase to avoid getting caught in a downtrend.

• Avoid emotional trading—fear and greed are the biggest pitfalls for investors.

• Stay informed by following macroeconomic trends, technological developments, and market sentiment.

• Diversify your portfolio to mitigate risks during bear markets.

The crypto market cycle is a repeating pattern of growth, euphoria, correction, and recovery. Recognizing these phases can help investors maximize gains and minimize losses. Rather than being swayed by emotions or market hype, understanding these cycles allows for strategic decision-making and long-term success in the volatile world of cryptocurrency.

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Beyond the Hype: The Power of Real Yield

Many crypto enthusiasts are drawn to high APYs without considering the complete picture. A critical factor often overlooked is "real yield." This isn't just about the advertised return; it's the return after accounting for inflation. If your gains merely match inflation, you aren't truly progressing. The focus should be on strategies that deliver genuine growth in purchasing power.

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Exploring Passive Income Strategies: Rewards and Risks

Several popular passive income strategies exist, each with its own risk-reward profile:

• Staking: Staking involves locking up your crypto to support a blockchain network's operations. In exchange, you receive rewards. While seemingly simple, it's essential to be aware of the potential risks associated with centralized staking. Decentralized liquid staking solutions offer an alternative, allowing you to earn staking rewards while maintaining liquidity—meaning you can still use your assets in other DeFi activities.

• Lending and Borrowing: Platforms facilitate crypto lending and borrowing. You can lend your crypto to others and earn interest, or borrow crypto using your existing holdings as collateral. This can be a viable way to generate passive income, but understanding interest rate dynamics and the risks of liquidation is crucial.

• Liquidity Provision (LPing): Decentralized exchanges (DEXs) rely on liquidity providers. By adding your crypto to a liquidity pool, you enable trading and earn a share of the trading fees. However, LPing introduces a unique risk: impermanent loss. This occurs when the prices of the two assets in the pool diverge significantly. Understanding impermanent loss and using available tools to calculate it are essential before engaging in LPing.

• Yield Farming: This involves combining various DeFi strategies—staking, lending, providing liquidity—to maximize returns. While the potential rewards can be substantial, so are the risks. Smart contract vulnerabilities, rug pulls, and other unforeseen events can lead to significant losses. Proceed with caution and conduct thorough research before venturing into yield farming.

Risk Management: The Foundation of Success

Every passive income strategy in crypto carries some degree of risk. Whether it's smart contract risk, impermanent loss, or the potential for hacks and exploits, it's vital to understand the potential downsides before committing capital. Don't be swayed by high APYs alone; prioritize the security of your assets.

The Bitcoin Question: A Useful Perspective

Consider comparing the risk-reward profile of your chosen passive income strategy to simply holding Bitcoin. Sometimes, the most straightforward approach can be the most effective. Evaluate whether the potential gains from a complex yield farming strategy outweigh the risks compared to the relative stability and long-term growth potential of Bitcoin.

The Takeaway: Informed Decisions are Paramount

Passive income in crypto can be a powerful wealth-building tool, but it's not a shortcut. A clear understanding of the risks is essential. Conduct your own research, understand the intricacies of each strategy, and never invest more than you can afford to lose. By prioritizing real yield and practicing sound risk management, you can improve your odds of success in the dynamic world of crypto passive income.

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In today’s rapidly evolving crypto landscape, it’s not uncommon to witness the arrival of a project that challenges established norms and creates new paradigms. One such project is SUI—a blockchain platform that’s rapidly making waves with its unique approach to scalability, speed, and developer engagement. As we look toward 2025, several key trends and market drivers suggest that SUI and a handful of other innovative projects could redefine how we interact with blockchain technology.

At the heart of the conversation is SUI, a blockchain that distinguishes itself through a high-throughput design and an advanced consensus mechanism. Unlike older blockchains that often struggle with congestion and latency issues, SUI offers lightning-fast transaction speeds without compromising on decentralization or security. This technological leap means that SUI is not only capable of supporting a wide array of decentralized applications (dApps) but is also attracting a vibrant developer community eager to build the next generation of blockchain solutions.

The platform’s emphasis on efficiency and scalability signals a shift in the industry. In an ecosystem where transaction delays and high fees have been common pain points, SUI’s approach offers a refreshing alternative—one that could soon serve as the backbone for more robust, user-friendly, and high-volume dApps.

Several macro-level factors are converging to shape the future of blockchain technology. As we approach 2025, the crypto market appears poised for a significant maturation. Key trends include:

• Widespread Adoption: More businesses and consumers are gradually embracing blockchain solutions. With improvements in scalability and usability, platforms like SUI can drive mainstream adoption by making blockchain-based transactions smoother and more cost-effective.

• Regulatory Clarity: As governments worldwide begin to refine their regulatory frameworks, the crypto space is likely to benefit from increased investor confidence. This clarity can provide a more stable environment for projects that prioritize technological innovation.

• Interdisciplinary Innovation: The integration of blockchain with emerging technologies such as artificial intelligence, Internet of Things (IoT), and big data analytics is creating novel use cases. This convergence not only enhances the utility of blockchain networks but also broadens their appeal across industries.

Another important element for future success is the strength of the developer ecosystem. Platforms that foster robust communities tend to attract more innovation and real-world applications. SUI, in particular, is gaining traction due to its developer-friendly tools and supportive network. A thriving developer community can rapidly iterate on ideas, leading to the creation of dApps that address both consumer needs and enterprise challenges.

This kind of grassroots innovation is essential as the industry moves past speculative hype and toward sustainable growth. With more developers able to build and scale applications, the promise of blockchain becomes less about short-term gains and more about long-term infrastructural improvements.

While SUI is emerging as a standout project, it is by no means the only innovation set to shape the future of crypto. Several other projects are also leveraging cutting-edge technologies to improve transaction efficiency, enhance security, and broaden application areas—from decentralized finance (DeFi) and non-fungible tokens (NFTs) to decentralized autonomous organizations (DAOs) and beyond.

In a future where diversification is key, investors and developers alike are encouraged to keep an eye on these emerging projects. A well-rounded ecosystem that includes platforms like SUI, alongside complementary technologies, is likely to drive the next wave of digital transformation.

As we edge closer to 2025, the blockchain space is on the cusp of a major transformation. SUI’s innovative approach to scalability and speed, combined with broader market trends such as regulatory clarity and interdisciplinary integration, suggests that the coming years could herald a more mature and efficient crypto ecosystem. For content creators, investors, and developers, this is a moment to not only watch but also participate in a space that’s evolving at breakneck speed.

Whether you’re looking to build the next breakthrough dApp or craft insightful narratives about the future of digital finance, the trends emerging today are laying the groundwork for tomorrow’s revolutionary technologies. Embrace the change, stay informed, and prepare for a future where blockchain is not just a buzzword, but a fundamental component of the digital economy.

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Like many a creative this time of year, I’ve pondered how best to put down my thoughts and reflections on the year just gone by; but in searching within for substance and story, I realize that I’ve allowed the venom of all my other worlds corrode my soul, so much so that I feel unworthy and unable to weave words into meaning, or at least the profound meaning I often delude myself into thinking my pieces have.

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This year began with several shiny new challenges, but as the year wore on, I’ve been stretched thin in every which way and the holes have started to appear. Indeed, I've questioned my humanity in several different ways this year. I've been reminded of my mortality in the form of the all too frequent hospital visits - set a personal best. It's been a sick year.

I've wanted to cry, wanted to mourn emotional losses and pains, but I couldn't. There was simply no time. Too much to be done. Looking back, It's so incredulous that at various points this year, I had to schedule my moping time, for fear of falling behind on other things. I've learned that this was my anxiety but in its third kit

Anxiety that sometimes has had me curled up in a ball on the floor, scratching at my already suspect heart, isolating for fear of "infecting" those around me. But sometimes, anxiety is pushing on despite it all. Not allowing yourself stop because you're convinced beyond all reasonable doubt that the world will collapse if you do.
And so you push, and take it all on, and you never stop no matter how heavy the load is. No matter how tired you are.

I've also had to come to terms with the fact that I might very likely be depressed this year, even as I consistently crossed off my personal goals — high functioning I think they call it. As self-aware as I've always thought I am, I don't think I've deeped how much I've let go because of this. There are so many things I genuinely enjoyed that I've subconsciously let go of, and I haven't really allowed it to sink because I now live this "get up and go, there's no time to slow down" life.
I can't remember the last time I did something I enjoy, not as a coping mechanism or to distract myself, but because I was genuinely enjoying the activity without a care in the world. I'm mindlessly scrolling through apps, listening to music, playing games, and often dissociating. Just numb. I'm realizing that I sleep a lot, not just because I'm always tired, but also because I constantly need an escape, looking beyond myself in the mirrors of the many rooms I've had to stay in as I trudged across the Federation in duty. It's been a lonely year - mostly

On Building Community

However, amidst the many dark clouds, I've had to face one of my biggest fears... leaning on others. I've been dragged up off the floor and had my blushes covered in more ways than I thought was possible by other human beings. It's a bit harder to contemplate dark thoughts when "Afapataya" is goofing off in the corner of the room, more difficult to give up when "The Swoon" is bouncing off some new ideas on how to make it. The world feels a lot less lonely when "The Alien" and "Fatnificent" sit down in the trenches with you and refuse to stand up till you do. And even though she never stops giving you shit, dispatching these heavy duties becomes a bit easier when you know "T" will come up with some explanation for your mysterious disappearance from school. You feel a slight ease about the future when you have drinks and a conversation with “Chief” and his path makes yours just that bit clearer.

I've always struggled with community projects. I'd usually much rather not rely on people to get things done. I've had to learn, unlearn and relearn the concept that no man is an island. Life has been quite an interesting teacher and this has been one of its more fascinating lessons. I’m a long way from being the perfect friend (or even a good one lol) but the people around me fill me with such a desire to be better… when they’re not pissing me off.

On Becoming Human - The Captain

My life has been one long series of happy accidents. I just might be Serendipity’s poster child, which is incredibly funny because I don’t particularly believe in predestined fate; but the heavens might have conspired to do a madness in bringing me The Captain.

The Captain is… hope. Something about seeing her smile after some underhanded banter makes me think I can go again the next day. She is a brilliant idea when it seems like I’m stuck, with creativity that puts me to shame and more meticulousness than I can ever hope to have. There is without a shadow of a doubt, no other person I would’ve wanted to navigate the muddied waters of this year with.

As I continue to navigate my mental health, neurodivergence and progress in life, there’s still a long way to go and even I don’t know what 2025 has for me, but I know with music, my community and the captain… I’ll be fine (I hope).

Have a beautiful year,

Oreoluwa.

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water and salt and fire (for Yinka)

Listen to water and salt and fire (for Yinka) on Spotify. Song · Tega Ethan · 2023

https://spotify.com

Medicine is quite a jealous lover, and like most lovers, it will attempt to drive you mad from time to time 🤭. Aside a number of vices, which I will not be sharing right now (mind your business), one of the things that has kept me from roaming the streets of Ogbomosho is music.

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Whether I want to scream out in frustration because nothing is entering my head, or I'm more sombre because life isn't exactly going my way, or I want to get silly and dance like my limbs are malformed (I kid you not, it's not a pretty sight) or just flex my voice (it's pretty decent ngl)... whatever it is really, I'm sure there's a song for it, and this brings me some peace.

I particularly like artistes with an alternative sound. I've always felt like artistes make their best music before they go mainstream and have to pander to the whims of the masses (it's alright if you disagree). Alternative or Indie artistes appeal more to me because they usually stay true to their sound, whether their sound is popular or not.

I've always wondered what I'd say if I ever met one of my favorite artistes, say maybe Tega Ethan in a random place like maybe on the Lagos-Ibadan Train.

I'd probably first apologize to him, because I'm sure his mouth must be paining him from all the singing he's been doing in my ear. I play an almost ungodly amount of music everyday, and omo he for don tire by now.

After that, I'd thank him. I'm a young man who wears his heart on his sleeve and is constantly chasing after something. That's bound to leave my heart and mind sore, because regardless of whatever,life is always going to life. I'm now living in Nigeria again. 2-0. I'm now supporting Man Utd. 3-0. Omo. I'd tell him that sometimes when it's almost all too much, I plug my ears and turn the volume up to the max (sorry Agios), and listen to Water and Salt and Fire, and that re-centers me. Then I can go again, even if it's for a few more days.

Southern Star

Listen to Southern Star on Spotify. Song · Gregory Alan Isakov · 2018

https://spotify.com

Lastly, I'll tell him to never change (too much). One of the biggest lessons I've learned in life is that no matter what you do, there's a group of people that'll resonate with you. Your tribe. And tbh, that's all you really need. I'll tell him that he has a tribe of people that enjoy the sounds he makes and that tribe is only going to keep increasing in number. I'm quite certain of it.

I suppose it would be an interesting conversation if it ever did happen, no? Hopefully, fate crosses our paths someday.

Until then, remember that Love is like Lagos traffic, so stay safe. I hope you have a beautiful week and I'll see you when next Apollo inspires.

As always, Bless you,

Oreoluwa.

…or maybe we did meet. Who knows?

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Adulthood Anthem

Listen to Adulthood Anthem on Spotify. Song · Ladé · 2022

https://spotify.com

I often grapple with the concept of adulthood. It still feels surreal that if I'm in a room full of kids and young people and there's an emergency that requires an adult, I'm the required adult (like ehn? Who? We need an adultier adult please). Whenever I want to piss my parents off, I tell them that in another culture, I would be married with 2 kids. But then, when I look back on that statement, I'm mortified because IN ANOTHER CULTURE I WILL BE MARRIED WITH TWO KIDS!! And that's really funny because as I am, I don't even think I'm doing this adult thing properly. It's all debit alerts, responsibilities and I seem to be having an identity crisis every two weeks.
What's slightly comforting about this though, is that I'm not alone in feeling this way. In fact, as I've come to learn, a very large proportion of the adult population are just kids who suddenly found themselves having very grown-up things to do and have been winging it ever since (ask your parents lol). I guess psychologists are right on the money when they say we never really outgrow our childhood, trauma and all (which explains a whoooleee lot tbh).

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The sad part about all this is that it’s all insidious in onset (see what I did there?). There's no big sign that says "CHILDHOOD ENDS HERE, ADULTHOOD 1KM AHEAD". Well, there's you turning 18, but tbh it's really not the symbol we think it is. At that age, you're most likely a weird mesh of childhood and adulthood, unsure of what lies ahead, except those who've perfectly mapped out their life's roadmap (must be nice sha). As for the rest of us, we tend to spend our teens wanting so much to grow up and be independent, and the thing is, you really don't notice your childhood slipping away until you start getting strange looks when you want to go on the bouncy castle or are watching PJ Masks (even though I know we all still do 🤭).

In the end, we can’t do a lot about this inevitable march toward death, but I guess we can always stop and smell the roses on the way. So, enjoy your milestones, live a little, appreciate the people ahead of you, and, if you feel like things aren’t exactly panning out how you thought at the moment, that’s alright. Give yourself room to figure things out. Even those we look up to have to wing it every now and then, and they turn out fine, so you will be fine too.

Last Minute

Listen to Last Minute on Spotify. Song · Sam MacPherson · 2021

https://spotify.com

As always I hope you find serendipity and in doing so, have a wonderful week.

Bless you,

Oreoluwa.

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Serendipity

Sometime last week, I received a message from a lecturer at my school. Usually, I don’t open these immediately, or for a few days, but for some reason I decided to check it out. It was an invitation to a Public Speaking competition. At first, I didn’t want to do it, because the caliber of people competing was top notch and tbh I wasn’t really sure I was up to it. But after a conversation with a friend, I decided to give it a go. So here’s how it went.

So the competition was structured in three stages: a preliminary round, semifinals, and finals. With your love and support, I was able to make it past the prelims, which was a round that was based on video engagement, as well as the decision of the judges. My topic was: “Why I hate Friday the 13th“. Here’s the transcript

For the Semi-finals, the topic I was given was: “The Voice that changed my world“, and this round was going to be solely decided by the judges’ decision. I initially thought about doing a Joe Goldberg-like speech (I might still write it out though), buut I decided to go with something less stabby stabby instead. Here’s what I wrote:

By God’s grace (when you get this, text me 😏) I made it through to the finals with the highest semis score. All well and good, but the finals were going to be live and I was up against some of the best speakers in the country. Gulp. After several attempts by my networks to disgrace me (smh Airtel and Glo 😒), I was able to deliver my speech, and at that point, all I could do was hope and pray…

And after an etetrnityyy of deliberation, the results were announced and…

And somehow, what started as a reluctant dabble ended up with me winning a competition I never imagined I could win. You really never know what will happen when you take a leap of faith sometimes. Also, a big congratulations to the legends Chulo and Keesh that participated in the tournament. It’s always an honor to hear them speak.

So this week I want you to do something challenging, without overthinking it. No thoughts about whether you can do it or whether you’re good enough. Just dive in and navigate the waters. You’ll find it’s easier and more satisfying this way. And in the unlikely event that things don’t go your way, you would’ve at least cleared all your doubts and learned a few new things. There are no wasted experiences.

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Well, that’s all for now, next week, I’ll be returning to the usual format and I have a pretty interesting issue if Our Stories lined up for you. Until then, I hope you have your best week yet.

Bless You,

Oreoluwa.

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now playing: The Cut Off by J Cole
"I never fantasize about murder çause I'm still sane
But I can't seem to fight this urge to make you feel pain"

Every time my laptop malfunctions these days, the urge to organize boys to beat the person that botched it becomes less and less repulsive. And yes, I know we spoke about love and letting things go last week but I'm still human and sometimes its hard to shake these feelings. Anyway, we move and improve.

Recently, I listened to a poetry unbound episode, in which Podraig reviewed a poem titled 'Phase One' by Dilruba Ahmed. The poem is so amazing in that it holds up a mirror to you and forces you to think about just how much you hold against yourself.

The Author talks about a number of their shortcomings, imperfections and weaknesses, but then she goes further to do something a bit special. After every line containing a shortcoming, they write "… I forgive you".

I forgive you. What's more beautiful than that. Looking your fears and flaws in the eye and making the decision to love, not loathe yourself for it. We all have our dark spots, that is the human condition. Add that to Society's call for conformism and hatred of unique traits (which are usually magnified as defects ) and sometimes its easy to see an individual existence as burdensome. I love the way My friend Mufasa put it:

But this poem laughs in the face of that. The author, who leaves the fridge open overnight, loses her bag in the airport and feels awkward & nervous for no reason, has now come out to tell herself that its okay. And that's not to say that these things are not being worked on. Its just a whole lot easier to work on your issues if you're doing it out of a place of self-love.

Honestly, I relate to the poem a lot. As someone with a lot of unorthodox behaviours, weaknesses, flaws and socially awkward practices, who is somehow also a perfectionist, loving certain aspects of myself is a mountain I've been struggling to climb for a long time. My tendency to overthink and be overcritical about myself and the things I do had me falling out of love with life for a long time, up to the point where I often had no desire to do anything, even the things I once found fun. Real low point tbvh.

But reading this poem, having honest conversations with certain people around me and learning to love the weird parts of myself, has helped in pulling me out of that place. And although sometimes I do slip back in, I realise that this is a journey and there's no pressure to get it right all the time. One practice I like to follow is to is to list out things that I'm feeling insecure about and add an "I forgive you" like the poet did. I've included a template for you to do the same. Hopefully it helps you as well. Feel free to post a clean copy for your friends and families as well. you never know who might need it.

now playing: Blinded by your Grace Pt. 2 by Stormzy ft. MNEK

For any of you that's into crypto, this is a difficult time. It seems like its been a red day for a while and you might be regretting and reconsidering because you're unsure of what's really going on. I'll just say this, just continue to do your research and grow your knowledge. And never forget the golden rule. HODL and have faith. We'll be back in the green soon.

now playing: Animals and Angels by Joy Oladokun

For your viewing pleasure, here's some wholesome content in the form of soldiers being reunited with their families.

This is me signing off and wishing you a beautiful week.
Bless you.