fluid of the Free Fall free verse poem series

• phase of falling

00.0 [back stories of poems, teaser, actions for social changes in April '24]

little differences moving:
(#LittleByLittle #CelebrateDifferences #Movement)

01 [are you still magical in the free fall?]
02 [how does a fairy free fall into the galaxies holding her before touching all that's below?]
03 [how did a fairy, after free-falling onto Earth, grow up 'from' a loving family & always climbing up to higher spots to free-fall again?]

• phase we fell

00.1 [prologue of progress in spaces between wonderland and physical spaces] + in-real-life loving experiences to evolve mental health

loving self-care:
(#SelfCarePromise ~ 24/7 is International Self-Care Day )

starting from 04... poems: to be sent~ (stay tuned)

[prologue of progress in spaces between wonderland and physical spaces]

hi, lovelies,

I've decided to still release the Free Fall series, then we'll move on to the Bounce Back and Fly Through series. As seen in the 'fluid of poems', the Free Fall poems 01, 02, 03 were already released along with the back stories.

 ♫ ♪ ♬ playing Wonderland by Taylor Swift  ♫ ♪ ♬
//to all our hope, dreams, & beyond...
We found Wonderland, you and I got lost in it
And we pretended it could last forever 
(Eh, eh)
We found Wonderland, you and I got lost in it
And life was never worse, but never better 
(Eh, eh)
//to all the lovely kind souls who wonder how did they get where they are without noticing the distance between them and their dreams...

prologue of the past of the free fall

when the throat is stuck with a dark matter, there has to be one way of another of letting it all clear and express in the suitable ways to us. For me, I love arts, poems, or any expressions to be explored. I guess this song expresses so much of what I feel. It's such an amazing world that I'm so grateful for. However, I had to admit that there were these words and stories untold of mine that could be shared with love.

it's not necessarily a human, but it could be directed to a lost soul.

it's not necessarily a goal, but it could a personification of a dream.

it's not necessarily a moment, but it could be a metaphor of a stage of life in the past.

 ♫ ♪ ♬  continue singing  ♫ ♪ ♬
I reached for you
but you were gone
I knew
I had to go back home
you searched the world for something else
to make you feel like what we had
and in the end in wonderland
we both went mad

shining hopeful love

while I release the Free Fall series, I've started drafting Bounce Back. From our Free Fall series that we've been collecting in drafts, it's time we just release after these edits. Again, they're the reminder of how we could express & always still feel loved eventually.

btw, we're having in-real-life experiences in Malaysia~

if you've not seen mentalhealthengineering.com, be sure to sub as well. If you're in Malaysia, we're having a booth-life thingy for experiences in DM Mall, Subang Jaya, Malaysia from 19th to 21st of July 2024. If you're having everything online, no problem. We're crafting experiences and all the things in digital for our lovely kind souls. As I'm joining @_buildspace season5, I'm also posting weekly updates on socials for 6 weeks.

experiences that evolve mental health: poems here, bottle crafts there, more paper crafts from used papers, spirituality that's scientifically proven, extended reality that's amplifying relaxing experiences, etc...

let me show you a quick short right here so that you know what I'm sharing about.

'Cause when I first started with VR, or any of the tech booms we've mentioned so far, I've personally seen so much that we could maximise the potential with love with one action:

'before mastering technologies,
humans master nature and us first,
and balance it all when we're using the advancing technologies
with humanistic missions.
We have so lots of pure love energies in each and every decision.
So much that we have complete trust in each other and
have infinite amount of joy with all the creations in life.'

Then, we balance all that we're mastering with humanistic missions. I mean, us first. That's why I truly hope that we could just prioritise doing what excites us the most while that part is overlapping with the things that the others would love to co-create together.

co-create together!
while it's all great, what else?

'cause we know that many of the people here know us from our online contents, I'd like to bring more things online too.

would love to experiment these out together, merch? or digital freebies? or digital assets? or the other more suitable things? while many things I mention is 'we', I love co-creating with the ones enjoying instead of just imagining the person creating these just creating alone. For example, when anyone is reading any of the pieces, just imagine ways in your head of what would these be if they're your words, what images, happening at where, what's the metaphor of 'what' in our own lives of different walks and backgrounds etc...

00.1 [spaces between wonderland and physical spaces]

please, we're in the wonderland
and if we were once lost,
we could find our paths to each other again...

rabbit was sobbing while rabbit said:
'come talk to me please'
'come play with me please'
'all I wanted was just to show you the way to all the things that are fun to me, not pushing you away from me'
'we're gonna come back here again and again'
'just like the cycles of nature'
'so, of course it's forever'

the power bank was the only light source with blue lights at night...
and the rabbit's the one who jumps out of the wonderland
to follow this light of unknown
that might just be gone when it's running out of electricity
recharging it,
charging? charging
again and again...

rabbit follows the light and saw a person
she's so old that she's here since trillion gazillion of years
waiting for something nobody knows
maybe even she doesn't
'cause she's forgotten what it was
but she only remembered that she's waiting and exploring what it was...
even until now...
what was it like eons before when she wasn't in such place?
'Where were we? Where am I? Are you here?'
the rabbit wasn't sure if it's her voice
or the rabbit just imagined the words naturally blending with the scene...

the rabbit was slowly approaching...
she started telling the rabbit something,
but the rabbit wasn't sure if she noticed that the rabbit's here...

'I wrote so many letters, but they're all unsent...
well, 'cause I know you have many things untold
and it's all widening the distance
day by day...
I wonder why we still care
if everything's just as it is...
I know you know about it too...
But we're too afraid to have anything else that breaks this
fragile little heart of glass...
But, I hope to break it and discover that
maybe there's my real heart of flesh inside
and it's free from all the glasses that look so sturdy
yet actually so fragile and hurtful most times...'

the rabbit was completely puzzled...
the rabbit is jumping on her laps...
she had so many pictures of cuddling with pets on the walls,
so the rabbit thought that she'd like it
but she pushed it away
and
the rabbit was completely puzzled...


when the rabbit was being pushed,
the rabbit saw the few letters being sent
were the most harsh ones...
this lady that's against time just seemed to store
all these loveliest letters, huh?

'why?'
the rabbit accidentally
had words slipping out of the mouth...

the lady's shocked and hugged the rabbit
while she's crying
'I thought you all never wanted to talk to me ever again'
her cry got louder and louder
and she hugged the rabbit tighter

so tight that the rabbit felt the organs being squished
'too tight, too tight! I gotta vomit if you do this.'
the rabbit pushed her this time and jumped off her arms.

she smiled,
saying:
'ya, too tight'

the rabbit just couldn't keep up with the change in her emotions,
thinking why this person is so weird...
'do you need help in sending those letters?'

a moment of silence with a slush of the autumn leaves...

'I made a scarf for you, it's gonna snow soon, here...'
she walked across the room to a corner with a locked box,
reaching to the scarf being knitted by the last ball of yarns she had

rabbit looks at her, asking:
'why?'

she stared at the rabbit

'you're waiting for someone, right?
why not give that person instead?'
the rabbit continued asking

she stared at the rabbit again...
not smiling, not shaking her head, not nodding...
just staring straight right into the rabbit's eyes...

'there are no "why"s for me, there are only "who"s.'
she was finally answering,
or sort of answering the rabbit's question.

'if there is a "why" in your world, 'why' did you get out of your wonderland?'

the rabbit's trying to have flashbacks of making the decision...
she couldn't find it too...
she realised that she's also a 'her'...

'wonderland was such a fun place, don't you think?'
the lady continued, with her gaze fixed at the rabbit,
she smiled as her aura is filling up the entire room, wrapping the rabbit.

the rabbit couldn't remember when did it happen...
no why... no what...
but, who? for who? oh, maybe for this lady, she thought.

'for you!' the rabbit said delightfully.

the lady's aura broke as her smile dropped.

wasn't it supposed to be a happy thing?
why is the lady's smile gone?
or,
is there even a 'why'?
if yes, is the 'why' important?
or 'who' is the more suitable question?

they didn't realise how time passed
as they stared at each other
and the days and nights shifted out in the window...

there...
it's really about to snow...
the lady put the scarf on the rabbit
and went to the kitchen to get food for herself.
the rabbit thought that they needed no food,
but who knows...
in the spaces between the wonderland and the physical Earth...
we could just do whatever we love
exactly as the way we think of ourselves...

wait...
exactly the ways we think of ourselves...
does that mean... ?

they were both unsure about many things
but none of those matter as they were seeing each other anytime they wanted to

'who are you waiting for, lady?'
the rabbit is hopping around and following her around sometimes
'lol,' she said.

'Idk,' she continued.
the rabbit's giving her a bored emoji on the face.
'you're waiting for yourself,' the rabbit said.
'oh, really? aren't you just like myself?' the lady said unconsciously.
'huh? how?' the rabbit thought that she's joking...
'are we not?' the lady asked with a broader smile.
'you're joking, right?' the rabbit's looking so serious.
'does it matter so much to you, my dear playful heart?' the lady laughed.

the rabbit stopped hopping around as she stared at the lady.

'what did you call me?' the rabbit asked.

'I am just kidding, rabbit.' the lady said.

'I wish you're not because I love to be your playful heart,' the rabbit said.

'here, your warm bowl of spinach. People out there thought that you like carrots the most, lol,' the lady's suddenly not feeling as old as she seemed to be.

'did you just grow younger? why are you so different? how did you know about people out there as you're just staying here writing letters for such a long time now?' the rabbit has too many questions that she forgot to say thanks as she scooped the warm spinach porridge in her mouth, one after another.

'for all the love we trust,' said the lady.

as they're eating,
we weren't sure if it's morning, afternoon, or night time...
or, time didn't even exist...
the darkness with moon has all the neon colours in the sky with snow...
the neon colours are wrapping the morning and noon sun beams inside...
magical yet eerie...?

the lady wished in her heart,
as she was looking at the rabbit eating,
'Dearest stars in the sky,
send all my pure love energies to all my children in pain and hurt...
although they've forgotten about me...
thank you with much love to you too,
my loveliest stars that will let us meet once again.'

it's so fun!

any thoughts &// suggestions?

comment with love~

*important messages gotta be repeated to be remembered:

'Before mastering technologies,
humans master nature and us first,
and balance it all when we're using the advancing technologies
with humanistic missions.
We have so lots of pure love energies in each and every decision.
So much that we have complete trust in each other and
have infinite amount of joy with all the creations in life.'

with love,
૮ℓเσɳα Chee Pui Khei 徐𣳽琪,
creating mental health tech at toplove.tech,
gathering resources at mentalhealthengineering.com public squad