Historically, I've never created New Year's resolutions for myself. I feel like I'm a pretty self-motivated person in general and hence never felt the need to formally codify them, but this year as my team at Senspace and I build out an application that helps us all feel like we're a part of something, getting some reps in around sharing my own journey felt even more important.

In this recap, I'll report on how I'm doing with my goals and set some new ones starting February 2025. As a reminder, here were the goals that I set for myself to start the year.

Ren Stern

@renstern_eth

2025 Personal Goals:

1. Take back mornings
2. Get back on the bball court
3. Reconnect with close friends
4. Make new friends
5. Drink even less
6. Finish 1 book/month
7. Go to ~1 new Asian country or revisit 1
8. Thrift more
9. Take more pics
10. Cut noise/Say no

Details

18

1:58 PM • Jan 3, 2025

Recap

1. Take back mornings

   This one has been a struggle for me so far. I'm generally a morning person but in January, I had many dinner meetings and in service of Goal #3 (Reconnect with new friends), I did have a few longer nights out than intended. Having something at night made it more difficult to take back the morning, even I did pretty well with Goal #5 (Drink less).

   I plan on amending this from Take back mornings->Make plans during the day, not at night. After speaking with a few of meeting counterparts, I ended up finding out that they too, in fact, prefer to do meetings over lunch/coffee vs. in the evening as it gets pretty tiring doing dinners several nights a week. In Japanese biz culture, there's a term called "nomu-nication" or "communicating over drinks," meaning that alcohol can help to be a social lubricant to create more open business conversations, but I feel confident that I can buck this trend with my sleepy peers.

   Making fewer evening plans also has the happy effect of helping me spend more time with my wife and our dog, which I already feel like I do a decent job of, but creating more time is only positive.

2. Get back on the bball court

   I'm proud to say that I've been very good at this one so far. I played pick up at Yoyogi Park in Tokyo three times, signed up for two Indoor Hoops Open Runs in NYC (highly recommended!) while back home and closed the month by playing in a 3x3 event for streetwear select shop, Undefeated, to close the month.

   Now that I'm back on the court, my next goal will be to get back into basketball shape. This means working out, getting to the court when I can, joining my friends' weekly runs, etc. If I can do a decent job of my amended Goal #1, I'm confident that I can be in prime position to start to get myself into basketball shape. Getting into basketball shape will also help

3. Reconnect with close friends

   I also feel like I've done a good job of this goal. This was helped by me going back to NY and visiting friends from home, but I've made an active effort to reconnect with friends from both NY and Tokyo. But reconnecting hasn't been the difficult part for me.

   The more difficult aspect of this goal, for me, is continuing to maintain that relationship without having something concrete to work on together. This is what I plan to work on in February and onwards: Maintain relationships with close friends

4. Make new friends

   This one has been a mixed bag for me. In many ways, I actually did a great job at this goal this month: I joined a book club where I met new people, I made time with someone who I'd discussed meeting up with for several months and learned that we had a lot in common, I helped host an event in Tokyo, where I met a few people that I could see myself staying connected with, someone who I met through work in December, I've now met up with a few times in various places throughout Tokyo and now feel is a friend, etc..

   However, what I did learn, especially coming out of my time on TimeLeft is that making friends for the sake of making friends is not something that I'm that interested in. What I care about is finding people that care about similar things, who want to explore topics that are on each others' minds and those who I can relate to due to some form of shared context.

   In the context of this goal, where I think I can improve is moreso around being better about making plans that help me further explore my own creative and intellectual pursuits, outside of work. For example, I took a leap and joined a book club, lead by someone I met in Thailand in November that was held in NY last month during my ten-day visit to NY: debating whether we could relate in any way to the narrator, Alex in Clockwork Orange, and other topics of the day through the lens of the book was the most fun thing that I did in January.

   I have a bad habit of waiting to make my personal plans the day of or only a few days in advance, which ultimately means many of them end up falling through, giving me FOMO.

5. Drink even less

   I have become so good at this one that I'm actually thinking that I can take it off of the list. I naturally do not drink much and the one club event I attended, I made a strategic Irish Exit to get home as early as I could.

   I think this plan is already folded in to amended Goal #1 of making plans during the day, so I am removing this one for a new goal (good job Ren!).

6. Finish 1 book/month

   I have crushed this goal, finishing three books over the course of January: Together by Vivek H. Murthy, Mixed Race Superman by Will Harris and the aforementioned A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess. I'm also on to my fourth book, Making of A Counter Culture by Theodore Roszak, a dense sociological analysis of youthful rebellion during the hippy movement. This may be my hardest one yet, but feeling good about achieving this goal.

   Don't want to overextend though, so will keep this at 1 book/month.

7. Go to ~1 new Asian country or revisit 1

   Interestingly enough, this goal is actually being pushed to 2026 as my wife and I are getting a second dog! We are already traveling for a honeymoon and the holidays (Christmas->New Years) with my family and don't want to add another trip this year to make sure we take care of our dogs! Will replace this goal as well.

8. Thrift more

   I thrifted 70 pieces of clothing to close 2024, but as I have started to "adult" my wardrobe to make up for this, keeping this feels imperative.

   I'm appending "adulting my wardrobe" to this as thrifting should be in service of adding more clothing to my closet. I've been good about wearing less hoodies, having turned 33 last year and making sure my wardrobe feels even more age appropriate is something that I want to keep working on.

9. Take more pics

   I still need to get better at this. Keeping this here.

10. Cut noise/Say no

    Also need to work on this. It's not in my nature, but I need to work on this for myself and the people around me.

Two New Goals

Now that I've cut two of my goals initially listed in January, I'm making two new ones for myself, starting this month.

1. Prioritize "Life Operations"

   I've been notoriously bad at this for many years, especially since entering the workforce. "Life Admin" are things like cleaning my desk, going to the doctor, being more proactive with my own taxes, automating more things in my day-to-day life, etc. I end up putting my work first, but if I don't deal with my "Life Ops" earlier, they end up taking time away from my work when I most need it.

   Making an hour a day for "Life Ops" and putting it on my calendar is necassary for 2025.

2. Cook more

   My wife and I are admittedly very bad at this. Eating out/ordering in Japan, is not super expensive (especially if you're not drinking much) and hence getting in a habit of eating out is easy. But there are clear health benefits/opportunities to save by cooking at home.

   We've already locked in Wednesday and Sunday as our "shopping days" so look forward to cooking more in 2025.

2025 Goals Amended (February Edition)

To wrap up here, below are my new goals for 2025!

1. Make plans during the day, not at night

2. Get into basketball shape

3. Maintain relationships with close friends

4. Make plans to pursue my creative and intellectual pursuits

5. Finish 1 book/month

6. Thrift more and adult my wardrobe

7. Take more pics

8. Cut noise/say no

9. Prioritize "Life Operations"

10. Cook more

Will be back in March! See how I'm doing then!