As probably almost everyone who's chronically online, I’m consuming a ton of content all the time. Just one more YouTube video before bed, I guess, but lately, I keep asking myself, what the hell am I even watching here?

First off, let me just get this out of the way: the YouTube interface is absolutely useless. You can’t really search anymore; it’s just an endless scroll of the same Mr. Beast-type grin or whatever’s trending. But this isn’t about YouTube itself—it’s about the content.

I’m genuinely starting to wonder: what the fuck am I even consuming all the time? Sure, there’s the usual running and cycling content, the occasional tech review, maybe a documentary (and honestly, shoutout to Swiss and German TV stations for keeping the high-quality doc game alive). But I’d be lying if I said this is the stuff that mostly fills my feed. Somewhere along the line, I ended up in these weird phases of watching Pokémon card unpacking videos, TikTok influencer gossip, Mr. Beast rage or wholesome-bait content—I don’t even know what category to put it in. Sometimes, I feel like I’ve accidentally fallen into this loop of content that I probably would have been super into as a kid or a teenager.

I once read somewhere that our music taste peaks in our teens—that what we like then sticks with us forever. I’m pretty sure mine hit its high point during the SoundCloud golden days, but that was also because I’d spend hours digging, finding new stuff, actually sitting and listening with friends. Now? Now I have these algorithm-generated (Spotify Radio) playlists based on “vibes,” “moods,” or productivity modes I’m apparently supposed to be in.

But this whole idea of “peak taste” has me wondering: why are we so drawn back into childhood content? Why am I watching LEGO reviews? How the hell do I know there’s a LEGO leak channel on Reddit with like 70k people in it?

And it’s the same for most movies on Netflix, Disney+. Like, why do I even have a Disney+ subscription? Why do Star Wars and Marvel still matter to me? Sometimes I feel like the internet has wrapped me up in this cozy little corner that’s a weird hologram, a replica, a fake version of my childhood, and the algorithms definitely know it.

There’s this feeling where kids today are supposed to grow up fast, but then as adults, all we get is an illusion of being kids again. Why are we trapped in this content? I know it’s comfort food, but why have I watched so much stuff that clearly wasn’t made for me in the first place? Do generations just collapse? Are we forever young?

I don’t even know why I’m writing this, but the more I look at it, it’s like my world has gotten strange. It’s not just online or real life anymore—it’s this constant switch between childhood and being a grown-up. Sometimes I feel like the algorithm’s figured out that the best way to keep us occupied is by trapping us in our childhood dreams and needs. And now that this is true, it feels like all content is becoming more like that.