She pressed the button on the garage door before her neighboor could see her face, not because she was embarrased, but because she didn't feel safe.

Safe from what, she didn't know. She kept the Youtube video playing on her phone. As the garage door came rolling down, she let out a sigh and exited her vehicle. She couldn't think clearly yet, with the Youtube video playing and her feet moving and her arms reaching for the bags. It was just enough distraction to get through the moment without panic. She took two trips to the kitchen so she could keep her iPhone in the other hand. It is 7:00 pm on a Sunday.

She needs to survive for two more hours before making it to sleep.

In a moment, she would address the situation— Her arising anxiety. The sense of panic.

Where were these feelings coming from?

The condominium was quiet!

Nothing out of the ordinary was happening!

You see, what Haejin is going through, is withdrawal. She has been on a drug the last thirty hours.

We will figure out what that drug was together, because it is not clear to me now either.

She arrived in Echo Park at 1:15 pm the day prior. She was wearing a red wool sweater, a white t-shirt, grey pants, and white shoes. Right now, she is wearing navy leggings, a grey Champion sweatshirt, white socks, and white shoes. I share this to show there is nothing special about Haejin, except that she has had a life uniquely hers.

She meets Matt at his apartment. Matt is tall, has a mustache and a good laugh, and he vapes tobacco. They met a week and half prior at a Christmas party. They walk through Echo Park's thrift stores, comment on the asthetic of two-toned hats, admire the genius of the pedometer installed in the pair of Adidas shoes. They hold hands. They banter. It is nothing you have not seen between two people going on a date.

Now, after lunch, shopping, and three drinks they go back to his apartment around 8:00 pm. For the next six hours, they will watch a two and a half hour movie. This will include pauses and rewinds, because Matt and Haejin have started two goals at once: one, finishing a movie, and two, getting as close to sex as Haejin will allow. Then they talk. They finally fall asleep at 3:00 am.

11:00 am the next day, they are holding each other. Matt feels very comfortable to Haejin. Everything about his arms holding her, the soft kisses on her cheeks and lips, his long looks into her eyes. Of course, she knows— It could be any girl here. Heck, he could be Mark instead of Matt. She also knows it's best to keep quiet, because no one likes a know-it-all. Her friend told her to "enjoy the moment", so she's enjoying the moment. Three more hours they spend in bed.

They get lunch. Mainly it's Matt talking, Haejin thinks. She follows the lead as Matt talks about American politics, and she responds with enough to keep the conversation going. He doesn't ask her too many questions. Haejin is fine with that because she doesn't want to share. Not because she doesn't trust Matt, but because she has shame for her current life. She's on EBT food stamps, Medi-cal, and she lives in her mom's condominium. She is thirty years old, with little to her name, and with ambitions to the likes of Rockefeller and Jobs. Lunch is fine.

They get back to Matt's place by 6:00 pm. They kiss a bit more. Haejin has her bag packed. She makes sure to pack everything, not a toothbrush or a sock remaining, because she believes she may not see him again. She isn't sure what kind of revelations they will have before their next planned date in three days. Maybe, even hopefully, she thinks, she will act on their incompatibility. Maybe she will have the courage to recognize that the red flags she's witnessed in the last thirty hours will sooner or later tear their budding connection apart.

Haejin has driven home. It is 8:00 pm on Sunday. She has opened and closed the garage door. She feels panic. She sets her bags down, and she writes in confusion.

What happened?

Tell me what happened.

She pressed the button on the garage door before her neighboor could see her face, not because she was embarrased, but because she didn't feel safe.

Safe from what, she didn't know. She kept the Youtube video playing on her phone. As the garage door came rolling down, she let out a sigh and exited her vehicle. She couldn't think clearly yet, with the Youtube video playing and her feet moving and her arms reaching for the bags. It was just enough distraction to get through the moment without panic. She took two trips to the kitchen so she could keep her iPhone in the other hand. It is 7:00 pm on a Sunday.

She needs to survive for two more hours before making it to sleep.

In a moment, she would address the situation— Her arising anxiety. The sense of panic.

Where were these feelings coming from?

The condominium was quiet!

Nothing out of the ordinary was happening!

You see, what Haejin is going through, is withdrawal. She has been on a drug the last thirty hours.

We will figure out what that drug was together, because it is not clear to me now either.

She arrived in Echo Park at 1:15 pm the day prior. She was wearing a red wool sweater, a white t-shirt, grey pants, and white shoes. Right now, she is wearing navy leggings, a grey Champion sweatshirt, white socks, and white shoes. I share this to show there is nothing special about Haejin, except that she has had a life uniquely hers.

She meets Matt at his apartment. Matt is tall, has a mustache and a good laugh, and he vapes tobacco. They met a week and half prior at a Christmas party. They walk through Echo Park's thrift stores, comment on the asthetic of two-toned hats, admire the genius of the pedometer installed in the pair of Adidas shoes. They hold hands. They banter. It is nothing you have not seen between two people going on a date.

Now, after lunch, shopping, and three drinks they go back to his apartment around 8:00 pm. For the next six hours, they will watch a two and a half hour movie. This will include pauses and rewinds, because Matt and Haejin have started two goals at once: one, finishing a movie, and two, getting as close to sex as Haejin will allow. Then they talk. They finally fall asleep at 3:00 am.

11:00 am the next day, they are holding each other. Matt feels very comfortable to Haejin. Everything about his arms holding her, the soft kisses on her cheeks and lips, his long looks into her eyes. Of course, she knows— It could be any girl here. Heck, he could be Mark instead of Matt. She also knows it's best to keep quiet, because no one likes a know-it-all. Her friend told her to "enjoy the moment", so she's enjoying the moment. Three more hours they spend in bed.

They get lunch. Mainly it's Matt talking, Haejin thinks. She follows the lead as Matt talks about American politics, and she responds with enough to keep the conversation going. He doesn't ask her too many questions. Haejin is fine with that because she doesn't want to share. Not because she doesn't trust Matt, but because she has shame for her current life. She's on EBT food stamps, Medi-cal, and she lives in her mom's condominium. She is thirty years old, with little to her name, and with ambitions to the likes of Rockefeller and Jobs. Lunch is fine.

They get back to Matt's place by 6:00 pm. They kiss a bit more. Haejin has her bag packed. She makes sure to pack everything, not a toothbrush or a sock remaining, because she believes she may not see him again. She isn't sure what kind of revelations they will have before their next planned date in three days. Maybe, even hopefully, she thinks, she will act on their incompatibility. Maybe she will have the courage to recognize that the red flags she's witnessed in the last thirty hours will sooner or later tear their budding connection apart.

Haejin has driven home. It is 8:00 pm on Sunday. She has opened and closed the garage door. She feels panic. She sets her bags down, and she writes in confusion.

What happened?

Tell me what happened.