Life of a Web3 Marketer: - Try to convince CEO to get a small marketing budget - Settle on budget for KOLs & events - Slave away to make it happen - Explain why you can't "make the zk depin product just go viral" - Hire an intern aka your unhinged alter ego - Wonder why eng still hasn't shipped the product - Tell community to be patient & promise you're not gonna rug while praying the team doesn't rug - Make yourself busy by launching partnerships - Talk to users who gave up onboarding b/c the website sucks - Tell team you have a funnel problem - Get told it's on the roadmap for next year - Realize you're quitting or getting fired by then anyway - Go on vacation for a week but still check TG 24/7 - Product goes viral while on vacation b/c you're now "in the narrative" - Team wonders WTF you've been doing the last 6 months - Don't sleep for 2 weeks to save your job once you're back - See your campaign work 🚀 - Insane growth for 3 weeks but then plateaus - Team considers firing you - Rinse & repeat