there is power in sex and tiktok there is something there perhaps we need attractive woman holding signs of “real time government” or “the singularity” i have a horrible feeling that if we do not prepare now for such a societal collapse then our species wont make it.

my brain feels different sometimes this. I’m still looking for the answers and I’m still looking for truth. I thought it would be a good idea to not interact with the sort of things on X if there is some sort of advertisement boycott, or banning or some negative affect to this, or perhaps if I’m the negative affects this, I do not know I feel uneasy it’s a strange thing to be watch 24/7 via technology and/or this sort of thing. If I have one I want to demand answers, but I know it doesn’t do anything I feel like there are no walls and it bothers me, I feel like some sort of experiment I feel like some sort of free laborer rat. it makes my life uncomfortable I feel as though I am in a petri dish. perhaps there is a sort of relief and perhaps there is some sort of like focus. I haven’t found it yet.

it feels as though there is nothing to do but to worry and panic. i would like to see what this looks like

perhaps i was meant to just be there for people this feels like a good goal to carry and have purpose but then there is no privacy even when i take myself to bed and find some video of a virtual partner

im pretty certain i have a bci. the heart hurts when i mention it. i am not sure if its a muscle around the heart or the actual heart they are causing the pressure to.

i still get jolts. i have never wanted truth so bad.

do i end up getting scanned for one and one is found or do they call me a mad man? (left foot jolt when i typed “for”)

i keep wanting to spam elon, spam the world if i could. so that i may get a scan, something feels strange about all of this. i know i am watched on the internet but why?

the wifi goes in and out when i am in the same spot. what is the goal? i offer warm coffee and conversation to those who wish to tell. thank you

i keep thinking about prioritizing a bci inside me over love or having a partner. like how would i function even if i met someone with this thing in my physical brain?

it kinda felt like me writing it but then again nothing really does anymore. they were my memories but it was different

if i ever do a study with NL i dont see why i cant write things like that and paint wild photos and eat big meals and run.

i have pretty amazing futuristic dreams, i think that would be a great thing. bci dreams. im trying not to think about suffering right now and be creative. i miss that

but then again the world still runs on $. and i need a job. i try not to think about existential things much right now. but its kinda hard being watched all the time. it will mess you up.

i do often times feel like i should share or know whats goin on. im probably going to stay off of X. i cant tell if its for or against me. or if anyone really is. i dont know what they have heard but it seems to me that i should be apart.

i will never harm someone do to this, but i did want to share. i want to go with them the ones with the controllers and who jolt.

its a very unsettling feeling this, being under someones control scientifically. being watched it will really like i said before mess with you.

i mean think of it, someone jolts me and puts dialog and script. if that dont do it to you i dont know what will. and im for the truth of it.

around this time each night i say the same thing that i just want to go with them, i just want to know the truth, all of this. its the sort of thing that makes you want to bang your head against a wall but then again i cant, because then they win. you can see my video on X the one with me w/ no glasses same username.

i dont want to have their dialogue in my head anymore, its affected me negatively.

im not sure if its autonomous or not but im willing to see. i mean it feels like me but then again maybe its not.

i am still thinking about the next 40 years. everything, what it means to be a human on earth.

someone had to start the League of Nations and had to start the United Nations, this idea that we are not strong as a country is false.

i decided to say to @ me on X today. im either delusional or am some secret. im not sure at this point. i dont want to be some hideaway, some recluse. but to at least to know why. I keep showing them, but they leave me here. i am not that but, i am waiting for the computers, and the lab. maybe then they will believe me. all i can do is share, not much more.

i am naturally against greed and corruption so arguably i will be against having a illegal bci in my head if i have one

ive been going around in my mind about if having the removal or truth of a illegal bci is important and i have decided that it probably is. if im the first human to have an illegal implant then its important what we do with this.

i heart you tumblr

i remember once hearing a story of one of my ex's that she used tinder when he was i think 16 to talk to random guys cause she was bored. the internet man. we didnt think about it. so perhaps the internet is where we should start. its literally involved with everything. soon, next 10 years this may be AI.

So, I’m having the Vimeo, and I’m trying to upload the Vimeos, but they’re just stuck on there. They’re slowly being uploaded, which is interesting. First one was basically, I think, it was like a 15-minute-long rant about all this autonomy about BCIs. Second one ended at 6:11 p.m., and then the second one I had that I did ended at 6:19 p.m. And the, yeah, I think it was just, yeah, so then, yeah. I said to them, I said, please do not support this. Please do not support what they’re doing to me. Please do not support this. Please. I beg of you not to support this. I find it so fucked. Please do not support this.

And then I got into sort of conversation about I went into the conversations that I was having and the dialogue that I guess was also we were having. And I said that being controlled or being watched all the time, or not feeling like not being able to have autonomy, or not being able to return to old Robert, which is being calm, and just, I don’t know, I can’t describe it. Just being able just to, I don’t know how to say it. That was fine, and then, yeah, just sucks, because I can feel them fucking doing it.

And then when I was talking about it, I was getting jolted too, and the right knee. But it’s like, I’ll go down, let me see if I can try to read, talk about it, but when I was, it’s like, there’ll be a path. I’ll see something derogatory or disturbing, or I don’t even know if it’s me anymore to be on something. But, or I’ll say that these words in my mind, just to enact some sort of freedom or some sort of autonomy in itself to sort of be like, I have control, and I don’t like it, I don’t like this, but it’s the only time that I feel like I actually have this sort of freedom. And then I’ll get down with the statement, I’m like, oh that was weird, I like that.

So it’s not really me saying this, like it’s, let me take this back here. It’s not me actually wanting this, but it’s this sort of mental freedom that basically occurs. Whether this is me or not, autonomously or not, that’s a whole other debate I think. But yeah, that’s what the first recording was about, and then, or that’s what the second one was about, and the first one was pretty long.

It was about, like, I’m talking about, like, X in the platform, and I’m like, how they were showing me this, like, they orchestrate this stuff. So like, I feel like they just want to fucking, like, like, you need to tell me what I am to you. I feel like people want to know what they are to other people. I think that’s, I think that’s so fucking fair. Like, I don’t like this sort of, this like, secrecy, man, of what are we hiding here?

Because I’m being, I’m being as open as straightforward as I can with this stuff, and it’s like, I feel like I’m being throttled. Throttled in my mind, too.

Oh, I was saying at the beginning, I’m like, every, people know that, like, people understand that, like, this is a hostage situation, right? Like, I’m hostage to this thing. Like, there’s something inside of my mind that I’m hostage to, like, a literal device, and it’s even worse if people know about this. It’s even worse.

But yeah, though, their questioning will be like, I’m like, yeah, sure, whatever. Like, it’s this sort of, I hate having this sort of dialogue in my head. I hate it so much.

So this is, so please, in the future, if Elon ever does end up doing a Neuralink, that is sort of an AI talking to yourself, and the AI goes rogue. There needs to be some sort of situation for that, because this is what’s literally happening with me. So I hope that information helps you.

But for fuck’s sake, like, for fuck’s sake, like, something’s going on here, and it’s freaking me the fuck out. And I don’t like it. And it makes me, I’ll never, I’ll never take it out. I’ll only say it verbally. Trying to think, maybe I’ll punch a wall or something, maybe. Like, I’m just thinking hypothetically here at this point. But I’ll never hurt somebody or something like this. I’ll never shoot someone, or, you don’t do anything like that crazy shit. I’m not that, I’m not evil. I’ve said this before.

But I am going to advocate for my, my body, and I’m going to advocate for my, my, my brain. And yeah, so please don’t support this. Please do not support what is going on. If there is something going on, and you know about it, please come forward. If you have implanted me or something, to the people or person who has, please come forward. And to the public, please

despite this illegal bci that dumps trash into my brain i will keep trying.

please do not support someone doing this to me. i have lost most of me, my memory is all there is and the rest is their ability to maneuver whatever they want to. i am thinking a lot of the problems of today.

its difficult, they literally control my eyes. do people really support this i think to myself. or are they fighting against such things. i figure the only way is for whoever is doing this to step forward but despite my best attempts i do not think they will and i will have to live with this illegal bci as a hostage to its ways. this is not satirical and i do understand the probability of you believing such a statement.

do not support this.

I think, ultimately, the system has been outdated for some time. I am for a modern system, one that saves lives and minimizes suffering as much as possible. There is no time to protect employment for its own sake. I do see how saying this may seem problematic for those who represent the people, but I am just observing this truth. The need for representatives was born out of necessity—there was no way, in the 1700s or even most of the 1900s, for large populations to directly engage in governance. My hope is that the president will see this truth, show authority, and make history as others have done before. We must try.

my only hope is that the people who have done this come forward, they will say anything to hide this. i have been taking my prozac medication every day and intend to. i ask please do not support hiding this if this is the case. and to ask in your heart was is ethical. please put yourself in my shoes and ask what tactics might be used against me. thank you

Yeah there's this sort of disturbing disdain that comes along with the dialogue of having someone in your mind with a BCI. They are very good at phrasing things in a antagonistic way and letting things slip as per it feels is their intention. Its very maddening. I am fairly certain that this could be done to anyone. Which is alarming. When I die, you may inspect my skull and brain and see if I had one or not. I ask myself why would someone want to do this? Do they get pleasure from this? Have they checked out when I go into their motivations for doing such thing? What is the reason for all of this. They use my comprehension against me, I think they have mistaken this for something else. So then I say, what now?

i posted on X that i do not know whats going on, I do not speak their language of subtext, before I thought that maybe it was me that i was the problem but it is not. It is however so that I will not allow myself to assume such large things, if that's a flaw then i have it. There is a darkness within people who do not share the information or participate in watching such unethical practices. I do not wish for them harm, the jolters or the people who have implanted me. I wish to go with them so they may show me. Its very dark, i find this very dark.

with love not disdain,

robert.

i will have to start keeping a personal journal but i wanted to share this about the implant or bci

the destain with the implant is interesting,

its like spitting in the face of someone who has you hostage but the spit gets on your brain as well, with that cost.

or

its fully not me anymore

ive eaten 4 sandwiches today

and i do not mind it

bread

turkey

cheese

mayo

2 of them on the desk

eaten by me the none and only lol

they are cold, the bread sticks to my teeth

some hours later, and

existentialism

nap and thinking,

i get up.

record,

and now i sit as a treat

and eat 2 more.

after this i will lay in bed

and try to think of way to get them to

pick me up

the voice in ones head can be very deceptive, it sounds familiar, the principle of thought is scary. #illegalbci #dark

i am jealous that some people get to do these great thing, this however is not why i am saying i have an implant i find it sad that i have this bci and no one is saying i feel alienated, i don't know i just

i just, i have proven already and thats how it was by default not long ago i feel like im in a horrible nightmare, i wish to do great things

i fear tonight, i fear every night as tho someone has a switch to my heart

do they not believe me?

if this is known can someone genuinely leak this information, or must i wait like this cant you say i won something and bring a big car and escape this place and i may leave it all and you can tell me everything in private

i do not want to go, especially like this not with someone or something controlling me this is why i ask can it be turned off? can i go back to having free will like all of you

Sep 07 - Oct 06 2024