It’s been about 9 days since I published my last long-form piece of writing. I’ve made some other things in the meantime, some music, some visual art, etc but as for writing, yeah, 9 days. That’s too long, so I’m going to pop the cork. This is a CORK POP.

Let me be perfectly clear here, I don’t have anything to say. No topic so this is unlikely to be a particularly insightful read. If you’re enamored of my voice for some reason (freak), go ahead, keep reading, I guess, I won’t stop you. But I just want to be clear that there is no subject here, no form, I’m not starting from an outline or seeking any given conclusion. It’s not even really stream of consciousness I don’t feel particularly tapped into anything rn.

This is an empty essay. These are empty words. It’s kind of like the Seinfeld of essays, it’s an essay about nothing. How achievable is this? Is it even possible to write an essay about nothing at all? Except, no, I’m not trying to write about anything I’m just trying to pop the cork.

Here we go. CORK POP 0001. I appended 0001 to the name because I expect I’ll need to do this multiple times in the future because I am not a consistent producer. I’m a spiky producer. Here, have an xkcd graph:

YOU ARE HER is where we are right now. That was a typo (“write-o”) but I like it so it stays. CORK POP 0001 won’t be the first big self esteem spike, it won’t be an interesting enough piece for that, it’s just an essay about nothing. But it will, if all goes to plan, be my on-ramp back onto this cyclical pattern of mine, back into the wave of production.

Here it is as a tweet if you’re interested probably should have put this tweet first as context that’s the more typical form but you know what, I’m not going to worry about it. I’m popping the cork! CORK POP!!

https://twitter.com/cry_prittie/status/1544069660148043776?s=20&t=QM7BKkxWDN6ZCsKzQnP4cg

Right so why four digits? Well that’s fairly straightforward too. As you can see in my xkcd (“bullshit”) graph above this cycle generally lasts about 10-14 days. If I need a CORK POP every 10-14 days, then, assuming the minimum length cycle, three digits gets me through 10 * 999 = 9999 days / 365.25 = 27.375 years, which is most likely too few to last the remainder of my life. Four digits will last me 273.75 years which should be more than enough in my view.

By the way did you notice my choice of colors for the chart above?!? Happy FourthFifthSixth of July! I don’t really have anything else to say about this. Like I said this is an essay about nothing.

--

Look at something with me for a minute.

How does this make you feel? This is beautiful to me. A few days ago I was talking to someone about The Godfather and whether it was any good at all. Their argument was that because the film is so unrelentingly up front with its themes and inspirations, it loses the power that is impressed upon the viewer when they have to labour to reveal a work’s hidden meaning.

I am not a huge Godfather fan but I took the opposite opinion because I’m insufferable like that. I argued that Francis Ford Coppola’s magnum opus is best understood through the lens of maximalism and grandiosity, historical epics, religious architecture, Catholic Church Organ + Choir pieces. In other words, subtlety and socratic method are not the intent of the work and not the mode it is engaged in. Instead, it should be judged on the values of coherence, comprehensiveness, and majesty.

Lizzy’s profile here does manage to weave in a little interpretive interest. “Loading,please wait” — this is evocative and its meaning is not immediately apparent, or at least it isn’t to me. But imho this is the Godfather of Twitter Profiles. No inch of this screen under the control of the profile owner is going to waste — the message of Wahhabi devotion to Allah shines through brighter than the screen can hold. Even draingang.com fits the Vibe (though I will not elaborate here).

That’s why I’m presenting it in dark mode btw. Light mode Jihad Lizzy cannot guarantee your survival.

Look again:

I bitcrushed this image to hell. Does it matter to the legibility? Yes of course almost nothing here is legible. Does it matter to the vibe? NO!! The vibe is intact.

WE NEED TO GO DEEPER.

Somehow, the vibes even survive the digital photographical equivalent of a Mack Truck. 32-pixel bitcrush and rehydration does nothing to kill the Wahhabi vibe.

--

Digital cults will be the new suburb in the future. Suburb culture requires a certain level of group conformity if you wish to reap the benefits of the “group”.

With civil society becoming extremely atomized, people will turn away from aspects of civil society like suburbs, churches, sports, career, etc as they will be unable to provide the same level of in-group benefit when compared to online communities.

This will eventually lead to digital communities becoming local again after they have created a method for establishing strong loyalty — and wish to reap the benefits of locality. This solves atomization.

Thus ends my schizo rant.

--

Read this:

Were you able read it? It’s okay, thanks for trying, I’ll read it for you. It says:

“Lizzy just signed the lease for the based retard gang corporate offices in Seoul South Korea it’s real it’s oh so real top floor baby penthouse suite, we’ve got the pole position based retard gang poised to usher in a new era of business a new era of prosperity for the modern age an era defined by the rejection of ugliness the rejection of genetic dogma the rejection of the Natural Order an adoption of beauty extremism transhumanism international beauty syndicate dominating the world one fashion show at a time full auteur/autist collective works everything in house the vision is immaculate the vibes are on fleek the passion is real the partnerships are strong and the victory is secure we are the next generation of taste those who do not understand will understand eventually we are the makers of fashion Kate but more retarded black eyed peas style we will dominate the conversation your parents will be asking you to explain based retard gang at the dinner table and you will not be able to, not yet but the moment will come when parents will be teaching their children about based retard gang theory of beauty theory of mind theory of music before teaching them their own names fundamental knowledge for the new world manifested by the power of our squad”

This CORK POP is dedicated to the based retard gang (谢谢 #basedretardgang). I love you based retard gang.

It’s been about 9 days since I published my last long-form piece of writing. I’ve made some other things in the meantime, some music, some visual art, etc but as for writing, yeah, 9 days. That’s too long, so I’m going to pop the cork. This is a CORK POP.

Let me be perfectly clear here, I don’t have anything to say. No topic so this is unlikely to be a particularly insightful read. If you’re enamored of my voice for some reason (freak), go ahead, keep reading, I guess, I won’t stop you. But I just want to be clear that there is no subject here, no form, I’m not starting from an outline or seeking any given conclusion. It’s not even really stream of consciousness I don’t feel particularly tapped into anything rn.

This is an empty essay. These are empty words. It’s kind of like the Seinfeld of essays, it’s an essay about nothing. How achievable is this? Is it even possible to write an essay about nothing at all? Except, no, I’m not trying to write about anything I’m just trying to pop the cork.

Here we go. CORK POP 0001. I appended 0001 to the name because I expect I’ll need to do this multiple times in the future because I am not a consistent producer. I’m a spiky producer. Here, have an xkcd graph:

YOU ARE HER is where we are right now. That was a typo (“write-o”) but I like it so it stays. CORK POP 0001 won’t be the first big self esteem spike, it won’t be an interesting enough piece for that, it’s just an essay about nothing. But it will, if all goes to plan, be my on-ramp back onto this cyclical pattern of mine, back into the wave of production.

Here it is as a tweet if you’re interested probably should have put this tweet first as context that’s the more typical form but you know what, I’m not going to worry about it. I’m popping the cork! CORK POP!!

https://twitter.com/cry_prittie/status/1544069660148043776?s=20&t=QM7BKkxWDN6ZCsKzQnP4cg

Right so why four digits? Well that’s fairly straightforward too. As you can see in my xkcd (“bullshit”) graph above this cycle generally lasts about 10-14 days. If I need a CORK POP every 10-14 days, then, assuming the minimum length cycle, three digits gets me through 10 * 999 = 9999 days / 365.25 = 27.375 years, which is most likely too few to last the remainder of my life. Four digits will last me 273.75 years which should be more than enough in my view.

By the way did you notice my choice of colors for the chart above?!? Happy FourthFifthSixth of July! I don’t really have anything else to say about this. Like I said this is an essay about nothing.

--

Look at something with me for a minute.

How does this make you feel? This is beautiful to me. A few days ago I was talking to someone about The Godfather and whether it was any good at all. Their argument was that because the film is so unrelentingly up front with its themes and inspirations, it loses the power that is impressed upon the viewer when they have to labour to reveal a work’s hidden meaning.

I am not a huge Godfather fan but I took the opposite opinion because I’m insufferable like that. I argued that Francis Ford Coppola’s magnum opus is best understood through the lens of maximalism and grandiosity, historical epics, religious architecture, Catholic Church Organ + Choir pieces. In other words, subtlety and socratic method are not the intent of the work and not the mode it is engaged in. Instead, it should be judged on the values of coherence, comprehensiveness, and majesty.

Lizzy’s profile here does manage to weave in a little interpretive interest. “Loading,please wait” — this is evocative and its meaning is not immediately apparent, or at least it isn’t to me. But imho this is the Godfather of Twitter Profiles. No inch of this screen under the control of the profile owner is going to waste — the message of Wahhabi devotion to Allah shines through brighter than the screen can hold. Even draingang.com fits the Vibe (though I will not elaborate here).

That’s why I’m presenting it in dark mode btw. Light mode Jihad Lizzy cannot guarantee your survival.

Look again:

I bitcrushed this image to hell. Does it matter to the legibility? Yes of course almost nothing here is legible. Does it matter to the vibe? NO!! The vibe is intact.

WE NEED TO GO DEEPER.

Somehow, the vibes even survive the digital photographical equivalent of a Mack Truck. 32-pixel bitcrush and rehydration does nothing to kill the Wahhabi vibe.

--

Digital cults will be the new suburb in the future. Suburb culture requires a certain level of group conformity if you wish to reap the benefits of the “group”.

With civil society becoming extremely atomized, people will turn away from aspects of civil society like suburbs, churches, sports, career, etc as they will be unable to provide the same level of in-group benefit when compared to online communities.

This will eventually lead to digital communities becoming local again after they have created a method for establishing strong loyalty — and wish to reap the benefits of locality. This solves atomization.

Thus ends my schizo rant.

--

Read this:

Were you able read it? It’s okay, thanks for trying, I’ll read it for you. It says:

“Lizzy just signed the lease for the based retard gang corporate offices in Seoul South Korea it’s real it’s oh so real top floor baby penthouse suite, we’ve got the pole position based retard gang poised to usher in a new era of business a new era of prosperity for the modern age an era defined by the rejection of ugliness the rejection of genetic dogma the rejection of the Natural Order an adoption of beauty extremism transhumanism international beauty syndicate dominating the world one fashion show at a time full auteur/autist collective works everything in house the vision is immaculate the vibes are on fleek the passion is real the partnerships are strong and the victory is secure we are the next generation of taste those who do not understand will understand eventually we are the makers of fashion Kate but more retarded black eyed peas style we will dominate the conversation your parents will be asking you to explain based retard gang at the dinner table and you will not be able to, not yet but the moment will come when parents will be teaching their children about based retard gang theory of beauty theory of mind theory of music before teaching them their own names fundamental knowledge for the new world manifested by the power of our squad”

This CORK POP is dedicated to the based retard gang (谢谢 #basedretardgang). I love you based retard gang.