Are you insensitive? Or is it easy to get angry? Are you thin skinned or thick skinned? Can you calm down and restrain yourself? Or is it easy to lose your temper? Is it possible that you have a biased view of something? Despite the verbal resistance of others, do you know the motivation behind what they say? Will others feel like walking on thin ice when talking to you? If so, your happiness will be taken away by your sensitivity. I know it's easy to say "don't ask too much for everything" to you, but it's not so simple to do. However, this article will introduce 10 ways to cultivate your insensitivity, which can make you happier.
Tell yourself you're not offended It's that simple. When you are in a strong mood, try to ask yourself these questions: "why am I so rude? Is it really so serious? What's the big deal?". Find reasons to persuade yourself: "do I really understand what he wants to express? Does he really want to hurt me? If not, what does he want to express?" Tell yourself that those who seem to offend themselves also have the right to stick to their views. In addition, it's just a sentence. The other party can't bring physical harm to himself. Remember, the reason we feel offended is that we attach our ideas to other people's words and actions: "he just doesn't care!", "She said I wasn't good enough!", "I know he doesn't really love me.", "If she were... She wouldn't say that." It's our own thoughts. So we can rethink. Tell yourself, "the other person is just expressing his point of view. It's interesting to listen! I find it great for others to put forward different points of view!" To stop yourself from feeling offended. When you learn to persuade yourself in this way and use the communication concept of "sticks and stones may hurt my bones, but words will not", you will become happier.
Classify yourself as an offender This is good for yourself and can reduce your offense to others. Anything, if you can transpose thinking, you can understand the other party's position, as if you were playing a drama. In doing so, you may find that the other party did not mean to offend.
Assume a well intentioned motive for others Unless there is evidence that the other party is malicious, otherwise, it is assumed that the other party's intention is noble. Although it seems a little stupid and unwise to say so, please assume that others are kind. Doing so can make your life more comfortable and happier. So don't catch the individual words expressed by others. Listen carefully to the other party's meaning and ignore its clumsy expression.
Separation of viewpoint and ID Many people are easily offended because they can't distinguish their thoughts from their inner self-consciousness emotionally. If they connect themselves too closely with their views, when their views are rejected, they will feel that they have been rejected, excluded and hit hard. Being excluded is of course very hurtful, but different views will not cause so serious harm to yourself. To improve your sense of urgency, realize that your point of view does not represent the complete you. In addition, what others think of you does not constitute a complete you. In a sense, you can separate yourself from your point of view, and you will be happy, full, and less likely to be offended.
Learn humility One religious leader said that if he heard that he had offended others, his first reaction was to stop and think about whether he made others feel offended. This is a very humble attitude, which can hardly offend others. But the religious leader did more than that. If he found any words that made others feel offended, he would find the "offended" and apologize to him. Humility can make people peaceful, and inner peace can make people happy.
Love the truth, not the right The value of truth itself is greater than who perceived it first. In this way, no matter how much the other party offends you, it will not constitute an offence to you. Don't stick to your point of view too much, just to get closer to the truth. Therefore, even if there is a point of view opposite to yourself, it is not offended. To perceive the truth, not mind who should say the truth.
Overcoming egocentrism Self centeredness is one of the reasons why you often feel offended. Your every word, every behavior, every thing you do and every motivation can reflect what you are like. If you think everything only affects you and put yourself at the center of everything, no wonder you are often offended. If you don't be the center of others' life, you can't always be the center of others. Most events are not centered on you. Allow life to be different from what you think. My bad mood has nothing to do with you. My mother's neglect of you is not because the problem is entirely on you, but also her own. In this way, you won't feel so offended and happiness won't disappear so quickly. In addition, he said that people have the right to have their own views, so let them express themselves. How good.
Reserved judgment After the discussion, let the conversation end naturally. We often come to a conclusion and even pun on others for bad purposes. Curb this impulse and don't jump to conclusions before the conversation is over. You'll find that you're not offended at all in the end.
Accept imperfections If you want others to speak according to your ideas, or think that others are as kind and compassionate as you. If others are disappointed and angry with others because they don't meet your expectations, you are easy to be offended. No one is perfect. Understand the bad habits of others. Everyone is just ordinary people. Everyone has shortcomings, defects in personality, personality and personality. the same to you! It's just that everyone's defects are different. So, shrug your shoulders, that's it. Don't hold on to other people's defects, you're forcing yourself. Relax, take a deep breath, relax. Accepting others' imperfections is also forgiving others' previous mistakes. Tell yourself so in your heart. Try to forgive others when they are offended by their words and behavior. Remember, no one is perfect, including yourself. Nine times out of ten, life is unhappy. It doesn't matter! When you can accept the imperfections of others (including your own), you can maintain emotional stability and embark on a happy life.
Accept yourself Of course, people should continue to learn, grow and improve themselves. Since you chose to take this road and give up others, accept the road you chose. Accept yourself deep inside and verify your choices. Treat yourself well and one day you will achieve something. You are your own God. We all live for hope. Accept yourself and strive to improve yourself. At the same time, we should also understand that we are the best now. Now you are the most complete. This kind of self acceptance will reduce your sensitivity and will not often feel offended. You won't be hurt because you're not what they think you are. People with weak heart, no matter how strong they look, are easy to be hurt by words. So strengthen your heart and accept yourself. Life will be happier and happier.