When the swirling stops, the dust settles. The debris falls away. The water recedes.

The picture becomes clear.

The value becomes apparent.

But so too the ugly truths.

The things that make me scared; make me sad; make me want to cry.

So, despite the feeling of fullness that comes from seeing the landscape, my mind responds, like an emergency vehicle, seeking to whisk me away so I don't need to feel the discomfort, the pain, the brutal reality.

But, I'm not in the back of the ambulance. I'm the driver.

And I need to sit, patiently, waiting for a real call, not a false alarm.