I look inside, trying to find it. When I find it, I realize there’s more. So I keep searching. Until I realize that there’s no “it” to find. The “it” is the process itself. It’s the question, not the answer. Why I feel the urge in my belly to move on to the next thing, I don’t know. Well, I do. Somehow, society has programmed me to never be content with where I am right now. I need relentless “progress” or else I wither and die. But what if it’s the relentless progress that is a form of death...

I look inside, trying to find it. When I find it, I realize there’s more. So I keep searching. Until I realize that there’s no “it” to find. The “it” is the process itself. It’s the question, not the answer. Why I feel the urge in my belly to move on to the next thing, I don’t know. Well, I do. Somehow, society has programmed me to never be content with where I am right now. I need relentless “progress” or else I wither and die. But what if it’s the relentless progress that is a form of death...

They induce anxiety, for sure. Thoughts begin. Consequences anticipated. Then, they compound. And the snowball increases. Tossing and turning, it’s increasingly difficult to find serenity, tranquility, peace, and rest. But… what if sleepless nights are a gift? What if they are our mind’s way of telling us:“I need to shake you out of your rhythm and put you in a tired, altered state for a day or so, so you can see more clearly.”In that case, you’re on the verge of a breakthrough. Something is ...

They induce anxiety, for sure. Thoughts begin. Consequences anticipated. Then, they compound. And the snowball increases. Tossing and turning, it’s increasingly difficult to find serenity, tranquility, peace, and rest. But… what if sleepless nights are a gift? What if they are our mind’s way of telling us:“I need to shake you out of your rhythm and put you in a tired, altered state for a day or so, so you can see more clearly.”In that case, you’re on the verge of a breakthrough. Something is ...

I sense, but do not know, that there are waves of energy inside each of us. Similarly, we are surrounded by waves of energy. Each wave, it seems to me, is like a piece in an orchestra. Every person has their own frequency. Every situation. Every thing. Everything. The challenge-and the opportunity- is to remove as much of the noise surrounding the true sound and to seek-and find- attunement. I know I struggle with it. And often times, I simply forget to even look for it. But it’s there. For m...

I sense, but do not know, that there are waves of energy inside each of us. Similarly, we are surrounded by waves of energy. Each wave, it seems to me, is like a piece in an orchestra. Every person has their own frequency. Every situation. Every thing. Everything. The challenge-and the opportunity- is to remove as much of the noise surrounding the true sound and to seek-and find- attunement. I know I struggle with it. And often times, I simply forget to even look for it. But it’s there. For m...

There are the big goals that are measurable. Then, there are the goals, like self-improvement, which are not. These require a type of faith. Faith that the daily commitment will pay off. Whether it’s meditation, yoga, or relationships, or something else, these require a simple commitment to doing it every day. There’s no medal. No ribbon. No trophy. And, many times, though they can be done in a community setting, you’re alone. Or, at least on your own journey. And many times it can feel lonel...

There are the big goals that are measurable. Then, there are the goals, like self-improvement, which are not. These require a type of faith. Faith that the daily commitment will pay off. Whether it’s meditation, yoga, or relationships, or something else, these require a simple commitment to doing it every day. There’s no medal. No ribbon. No trophy. And, many times, though they can be done in a community setting, you’re alone. Or, at least on your own journey. And many times it can feel lonel...

Crying is just grief leading the body. -Dr. Robby, The Pitt (HBO Max)There are things we want. Then, there are the things we have. I’m not talking about a 3 year old throwing a tantrum inside a toy store. I’m talking about the bigger things. The jobs we thought we’d have. The lifestyles. The kids. The marriage. The people who died too young. The big stuff. That leaves a gap. The gap is grief. And grief, if it doesn’t get cleaned out, can become toxic, like sepsis. Crying is one way to do that...

Crying is just grief leading the body. -Dr. Robby, The Pitt (HBO Max)There are things we want. Then, there are the things we have. I’m not talking about a 3 year old throwing a tantrum inside a toy store. I’m talking about the bigger things. The jobs we thought we’d have. The lifestyles. The kids. The marriage. The people who died too young. The big stuff. That leaves a gap. The gap is grief. And grief, if it doesn’t get cleaned out, can become toxic, like sepsis. Crying is one way to do that...

The base human program has a “fight or flight” reaction. We’re wired to feel fear. Is it a rustling of the grass or a tiger? Fears, whether of wild animals, loss of job, insufficient resources, or catastrophic futures, are intensified, exacerbated, and magnified by fatigue. Well, at least for me, they are. Because when I’m fatigued, the muscle that is most weakened is my attention muscle. Where and how I choose to put my attention determines the quality of my decisions. It determines the degr...

The base human program has a “fight or flight” reaction. We’re wired to feel fear. Is it a rustling of the grass or a tiger? Fears, whether of wild animals, loss of job, insufficient resources, or catastrophic futures, are intensified, exacerbated, and magnified by fatigue. Well, at least for me, they are. Because when I’m fatigued, the muscle that is most weakened is my attention muscle. Where and how I choose to put my attention determines the quality of my decisions. It determines the degr...

Along the path of life, there are many distractions. Many temptations. It’s easy to logically talk yourself into what you “should do.” After all, it makes sense. Plus, it can be comfortably explained to others. Less easy, however, is saying “no” to the temptations and the distractions. Saying “no” to what “should” be done. But, I sense, that is actually the only true path. Finding the true self, the soul, the spirit voice, whatever that is your compass, magnetically aligning to your true nort...

Along the path of life, there are many distractions. Many temptations. It’s easy to logically talk yourself into what you “should do.” After all, it makes sense. Plus, it can be comfortably explained to others. Less easy, however, is saying “no” to the temptations and the distractions. Saying “no” to what “should” be done. But, I sense, that is actually the only true path. Finding the true self, the soul, the spirit voice, whatever that is your compass, magnetically aligning to your true nort...

I’m no expert on processing grief. I used to think that there was only one way of doing it though. Let’s call it “the eruption.” Kind of a massive catharsis. But now I wonder if there’s another way? Sometimes, when I sit in a sauna, I am not aware of the heat. I’m just there. But sometimes, I really feel it. I can feel the metals getting pushed out of my body, slowly, with each drip of sweat. It’s not painful, per se, but it is challenging. But it’s not a torrent. It’s a slow, steady, trying ...

I’m no expert on processing grief. I used to think that there was only one way of doing it though. Let’s call it “the eruption.” Kind of a massive catharsis. But now I wonder if there’s another way? Sometimes, when I sit in a sauna, I am not aware of the heat. I’m just there. But sometimes, I really feel it. I can feel the metals getting pushed out of my body, slowly, with each drip of sweat. It’s not painful, per se, but it is challenging. But it’s not a torrent. It’s a slow, steady, trying ...

A divorced friend of mine was telling me that he wasn’t “ready” to get back into the dating pool. Only thing is, everything he told me about where his life was at that moment, suggested otherwise to me. He didn’t feel ready. He seemed ready though. I don’t feel ready either. I don’t feel like my training is done. So, like my friend, I feel nervous, apprehensive, and scared. I feel the sense of dread wash over me, causing shivers, creating tension in my shoulders, deepening the pit in my stoma...

A divorced friend of mine was telling me that he wasn’t “ready” to get back into the dating pool. Only thing is, everything he told me about where his life was at that moment, suggested otherwise to me. He didn’t feel ready. He seemed ready though. I don’t feel ready either. I don’t feel like my training is done. So, like my friend, I feel nervous, apprehensive, and scared. I feel the sense of dread wash over me, causing shivers, creating tension in my shoulders, deepening the pit in my stoma...

According to my nonagenarian father, it’s impossible to avoid regret in life. What is possible, however, is to avoid allowing it to become toxic. I suspect that regret toxicity comes from an unwillingness to acknowledge the pangs that come regret, thereby enabling them to fester and metastasize. The alternative is understandably avoided. It’s to allow, even welcome the pangs of regret, doing nothing other than feeling them, observing them, and acknowledging them, the same way one might when a...

According to my nonagenarian father, it’s impossible to avoid regret in life. What is possible, however, is to avoid allowing it to become toxic. I suspect that regret toxicity comes from an unwillingness to acknowledge the pangs that come regret, thereby enabling them to fester and metastasize. The alternative is understandably avoided. It’s to allow, even welcome the pangs of regret, doing nothing other than feeling them, observing them, and acknowledging them, the same way one might when a...

They are two sides of the same coin, aren’t they? They are days or moments when I feel “I’ve got this.” Which is basically a sign that “you’re about to find out that you don’t really got this.” And yet, though I’ve experienced this cycle a few times, it keeps happening. Why? By now, I should know better. Plus, I hate, no despise, the feeling of being humiliated. It makes me feel weak, vulnerable, and scared. Scared that it’s the beginning of an irreversible trend, like a snowball picking up s...

They are two sides of the same coin, aren’t they? They are days or moments when I feel “I’ve got this.” Which is basically a sign that “you’re about to find out that you don’t really got this.” And yet, though I’ve experienced this cycle a few times, it keeps happening. Why? By now, I should know better. Plus, I hate, no despise, the feeling of being humiliated. It makes me feel weak, vulnerable, and scared. Scared that it’s the beginning of an irreversible trend, like a snowball picking up s...

Deep down, next to that sense of the eternal, there’s a void. An abyss. It’s the place where fear resides. That cliff that, when you fail, you’re going to fall off and meet the end. Not a physical end, rather some type of “self-identity” death or a “self-esteem” death. For me, that feeling of fear, of terror, that if I try something and I don’t measure up to my own self-image and my self-narrative, that I’m going to suffer. That feeling, like that pit in your stomach when you jump off a high ...

Deep down, next to that sense of the eternal, there’s a void. An abyss. It’s the place where fear resides. That cliff that, when you fail, you’re going to fall off and meet the end. Not a physical end, rather some type of “self-identity” death or a “self-esteem” death. For me, that feeling of fear, of terror, that if I try something and I don’t measure up to my own self-image and my self-narrative, that I’m going to suffer. That feeling, like that pit in your stomach when you jump off a high ...