Walking down the path and across the rice fields at noon, I was in a hurry to deliver lunch to my daughter in elementary school.

The little red canvas bag contained a hot bento, as well as a water bottle, fruit and a few small biscuits. I walked in a hurry. I was afraid that it would be cold and the fruit would be hot. Although it was early summer, the rice fields were bright and hot at noon, and I was sweating all over.

Fortunately, the path is not long, waiting for me at the end of the road are those tall and dense acacia trees, as long as I can walk under the trees, I can breathe a sigh of relief.

In the thick shade of these old acacia trees, a shallow stream flows through, and many kinds of wild flowers and weeds grow on the shore. When you get out of the blinding sunlight, you will feel that the forest is very special. Accompany, especially quiet, cool and fragrant.

I could smell a fragrance under the tree, but I couldn't tell if it was the smell of flowers or grass. When the cool breeze came, the fragrance floated around me, and it didn't dissipate for a long time. I couldn't help but stand greedily.

Suddenly, I found that I was repeating an action, an experience. I had the same experience in my seven-year-old childhood, seventeen and twenty-seven years: I stood still under a few big trees, just because it was early summer, and nature was full of A refreshing aroma.

But it's just a small shade, just some common flowers and trees, but it can always send out a familiar and kind fragrance to me. With the quiet presentation of the memory, my mind became extremely quiet and at ease. Suddenly I figured out, for so many years, what I've been pursuing is not just such a small world with a fragrant fragrance?

In daily life, because I am afraid of seeing cruel scenes, afraid of hearing sad stories, afraid of talking about wars and displacement, so when some friends laughed and called me an "ostrich", I also began to believe them. I thought: Maybe as they said, I am an ostrich who escapes reality. My attitude towards life is unhealthy and weak, so I always feel guilty and feel sorry for my friends and the society.

However, on such an early summer noon, under the shade of a tree, I suddenly thought differently. It is because of the familiar fragrance among the grass blades. I suddenly feel that I don't have to feel so guilty. I have been living my life very hard. Really, I have always been trying very hard, trying to remove all traces of confusion and trying to achieve a simple and true essence. .

All I want to live is the life that God originally gave us. Although the world has been changed beyond recognition by greed and ignorance, although many good things have turned bad. However, I still have the right, the right to claim a kind of innocence and beauty that should belong to us.

Therefore, I may not be an "ostrich", maybe I should be a "gold digger", constantly filtering and searching in the turbid river water and sand. Hope, at the bottom of the last sieve, find that one. That shiny golden sand that should have belonged to us.

The children's school is just ahead, and I can already hear their vague laughs, what are they shouting about? But what is certain is that they used a purest voice, so I, who was outside the wall, were also infected with a kind of pure happiness.

What I want to keep, is this a pure heart?

When I came to the bow of the ferry, it was just about noon.

The little girl who sold the ticket told me that the ferryman had gone for lunch and asked me to go around the neighborhood and come back.

I have always lived in a society where every minute is accurate and the rules are very strict. Therefore, at first glance, I can't believe that there is such a thing as sailing or not sailing at will. I feel very warm in my heart, and people follow along. loose down.

I thanked her with a smile, and then carefully collected the ticket she gave me. It was a small and thin piece of paper. After so many years, everything has changed. Only this ticket is still the same as it was back then. Thin and humble, just like my heart back then.

Walking along the shore, the wind is soft and the sun is soft. I was wearing a light grey* long-sleeved shirt with a lot of fine lace, and the cotton fabric was crisp and comfortable to wear. With my hands in the pockets of my skirt, I'm quite a laid-back person, with the whole long afternoon ahead of me, no rush or rush.

The tide is very high, I don't know what month it is in the lunar calendar? The boat that was close to the shore also floated up high, so close to the shore.

Before my eyes, there were two small boats floating on the full water, all painted in powder blue*, and some dark blue, dark purple and snow white lines were drawn around the boats, which were reflected in the moving soup. In the water, it shattered into gentle and bright chromophores.

I sat down on the stone steps on the shore, and the full tide was like overflowing happiness. I know that the tide goes up and down, and I also know that happiness can't stay forever; but when it's full in front of me, the only thing I should do is sit quietly, observe it, enjoy it and be grateful for it.

isn't it? On a sunny day like this, before the full tide, the only thing I had to do next to these two pink-blue-pink-blue boats was to find a place to sit and take it in peace Such pure joy and happiness. At this moment, nothing has happened, nothing has yet time, time to speak, to think, to live, to love and be loved.

After a while, when the boatman returns, I will get into his boat and cross the river to the other side. I don't know what's going to happen on the other side, and I don't know what kind of fate awaits me in front of me, just like me who came to transition 20 years ago, everything is completely unknown .

However, today, I have understood something. Of course, I will also change my mood with the ups and downs of fate, I will laugh or cry, but, I think, I will no longer regret it, and I will no longer feel regret.

It turns out that the source of sadness is not because happiness is fleeting, but because it is not noticed when happiness is approaching.

So, when happiness has passed, I don't have to be sad and weep, as long as I can know when it comes, and if I can comprehend and grasp it quietly, even if it finally passes, I will be very content. .

In the distance, the boatman waved to me, and I stood up with a smile, and before taking a step, I looked back again.

The wind is clear and the clouds are calm, what a gentle scene! I know that after I leave, this ferry under the sun will always remain in my heart, and I will never forget it.

But what is the definition of "forever"? How long and how long can it be?

When I was a child, I read Chinese textbooks and read some big articles, and I always wondered, what is the ordinary life of those who write these righteous and impassioned articles? They should also have times when they are weak or naive, and they may also prefer sweet food or a soft breeze that looks at the sky.

From the notes at the end of the text, I can't find any clues, and all the materials just tell me what they have achieved, what books they have written, how many names they have taken, which year they were born and which year they jumped to the moon After death, what other names did others give them and so on.

Maybe there are not many records left at that time, maybe our teachers or textbook editors only want to give us so much, maybe many people think that we only need to know so much.

However, how can such records, such materials, and such introductions be enough? After their moral articles, after their fame and right and wrong, what I want to know more is what kind of heart did they have when they were alone? They must have been young, laughed, cried, and loved deeply, right? There should be no difference between them a thousand years ago and me a thousand years later, right?

Who can ignore the soft wind blowing in the middle of spring? Who can pass a tree full of flowers without being moved? Those living in the Book of Songs, those bustling little people and their joys and sorrows, should be very, very far away from us, but every time I open those chapters, it seems to open up their world, sing and dance with them, Weeping together, it was as if the spring full of peach blossoms three thousand years ago was just around the corner.

That's what "forever" means.

That is to say: apart from fame, rise and fall, there should be something that is more long-term and more important, there should be something to be cherished and treasured, there should be something that we can believe in and hope that it will never be. will disappear.

That is to say: if someone sang in an ancient poem: "Shejiang picks hibiscus, Lanze has many herbs...", I can continue to sing today: "Whoever wants to pick, thinks in a long way... "And when I sang, I also had the same melancholy and sadness that he felt that day, and the lotus in him could bloom as well as before. Although the person who sang a thousand years ago and the person who was missed by him have long since disappeared, as long as there are people, as long as there are songs, as long as the seasons change, there will be a feeling of longing in this world, and it will never be Change will never go away.

So, what is there to regret in life?

Many people like to tell us that life is just like a dream, after the complicated beauty and twists and turns, we wake up leisurely, but the new cooking is still unripe.

But I'm always unconvinced, I always feel that life itself should have a meaning, and we are by no means a game in vain. In this world, some things are repeated and extended all the time. Every time I hold my children, I think of how tenderly my young mother once held me. Every time I cut and wash vegetables and fruits for my child. I will think of how my mother used to feed us inch by inch. And one day, I will finally grow old like today's mother. At that time, my daughter will be like me today, washing the delicious vegetables and fruits under the endless tap, and then take her inch by inch. child feeding grows up. So, who can say that these are just a dream?

And every time I smell the fragrance of grass and see the ebb and flow of the tides, I think of those happy moments I once had. No matter how the time flies, how the scenery changes, some things in nature will never change, and the memory I have worked hard to live will always be there, every time I search, every time is still there, such a life, you teach How can I not love?

Of course, my friends can also say that no matter how hard I try, I am still in the dream of a yellow beam, and everything will gradually pass.

However, there will always be something left, and although I don't know exactly what it will be, I am convinced that all my efforts will never be in vain.

In the endless dream of Huangliang, there must be a woman who likes me and has the same thoughts as me. When she reads my notes a thousand years later, she will be delighted to find that even though so many years have passed, even though Hatred and war are still unavoidable in the world, but as long as there is still a fragrance between the grass and the leaves, the tides still rise and fall on time, all the pain is easier to endure, and life is still worthy of trust and love.

So what do we have to regret?