The more work I do, the more I understand the kinds of work I like to do and am good at. Thus, the more likely I am to opt in or out of certain kinds of work*.

Some people see this as being “too good” for other kinds of work. That’s unfortunate because it’s often the kind of work they want to do more of; the less of it I do, the more there is for them. Instead of seeing it as an opportunity for themselves, they see it as my wholesale rejection of who they are and what they like, which simply isn’t true.

The example that prompted this is accessibility. As a designer, accessibility is, shall we say, pretty important. It should be a given, but like many other things that should be a given, it’s often not. When I was designing wireframes, workflows, IA, content strategy, and more, I had to give accessibility & usability significant time and attention. It was simply a part of that set of responsibilities I had at the time. But I wasn’t interested in the topic of accessibility itself. Colleagues, client-side peers, and industry influencers were far, far more interested in that world. They cared more and they put more into it.

This isn’t to say I don’t care. I’m colorblind; of course I care. I’m terrible with comprehending instructions; of course I care. I personally feel the impact of poorly accessible experiences.

It’s just not the part of the problem I’m drawn to. In the same way that the parts of the problem I’m drawn to are unappealing to others. There’s no universal value judgement here; it’s personal.

Some people want you to think that unless you care about something as much as they do, you don’t care about it at all. That can’t possibly be true. I think we all know that, but we get wrapped up in needing to know our contributions matter and we don’t have a better way to communicate that. We know others’ work matters, but we don’t want to be left out. The rest of the internet isn’t helping train us any better, so we ought to figure it out for ourselves.

This all touches on what I call “asymmetric attention”. Asymmetric attention is the phenomenon of unintentionally minimizing the work and contribution of others. It’s like seeing their work through a keyhole, assuming that whatever we can see through that keyhole is all that exists or all that matters when in reality, the space is much larger. This underneath why we ask others, “How hard can it be?” or “Why don’t you just do…?”

The best antidote to asymmetric attention is humility and earnest exposure. Take note of the ways others work, the questions they ask, the way they prioritize. Invite a discussion around the tradeoffs, system dynamics, and other factors that go into each other’s process. With a few folks from other teams, take a few sticky notes to design a product/workflow/service/process on your own, then compare notes to see where you’re aligned, where you’re not, and where you could be. See another’s work as they see it.

Surprisingly, this exercise of understanding others’ contributions can help you better understand your own proclivities and then lean into those more and more. And of course, not neglecting or diminishing the contributions of those around you.

* This doesn’t mean I exclusively only do what I want and never do what I don’t want; that’s often not true. Context matters.