I think a lot about how I would live my life if I could do whatever I wanted. That's a very childish idea, but I see it as a sign of how unfree we actually live. We are so caught up in our everyday lives, in our bubble, in our hamster wheel. Shaped by our parents' upbringing, which in turn is based on what they were taught and modeled. This is related to our social fabric, our culture and history. With the values that are given to us through this. One can draw this circle of influence larger (the continent, the country, whether we are born into the lower or middle class, or even belong to the upper class), or draw it smaller (our immediate social environment, the circle of friends and acquaintances, the place where we live, our work etc.). And, of course, it is also related to our very own individual experiences that shape us and the lessons we learn along the way. It becomes even more complex when we consider that our unique personality also interprets and values all of this in very specific ways. This is how we grow up as a person in this world. In our place, which we have been assigned by lottery through fate. And with this I really mean the respective place and the respective circumstances of life. What is, if one - according to own evaluation and feeling, thus both emotionally experienced and rationally seen - is dissatisfied with his overall situation? Well, the simple and quick answer is: you have to change something. But what if one realizes that, due to external circumstances and factors, it is not so easily possible to actually make these changes? Well, you could work on accepting it. To live with it. But at the same time, that means giving up in a way. To give up one's dreams and visions, the desire for change....

As a thought experiment, I now formulate my wish. Even if it is unconventional and will most likely meet with rejection.

I wish to receive an amount of money that is so high that I don't have to have any financial worries until the end of my life. That’s all I need right now, at this point in my life. A sum of money that is so high, that my standard of living will allow me to fully develop in my free time. To be able to live my life to the fullest. To be able to enjoy life as I interpret enjoyment. Feeling completely free.

The world is so incredibly big, there is an infinite amount to discover. I want to have the opportunity to travel to the places I want to see with my own eyes. Be able to experience them! I would like to learn. About foreign countries and cultures, the animal kingdom, interesting people and life forms.

I want to have the time and resources to learn a new language. Preferably French, as I dream of living there when I’m an old lady. I would like to have a nice home. Furnished to my taste, so I can enjoy the aesthetics of things, when I look at them. I would like to live in a beautiful place, where nature is on the doorstep, but the nearest city where you can experience something different every day is also not far.

I want to have the time and peace to do sports (start learning yoga), read a lot of books and learn a lot about many topics that interest me.

I want to have the time to be able to be creative. Make art, enjoy art.

Yes I want (MUST?) buy myself time... take time... to enjoy life with dear people, to go on trips (Paris, New York, Cape Town, Amalfi Coast, Madrid, Copenhagen, Los Angeles etc.). To cook and laugh and make the greatest memories.

And I also want to grow as a person. Learn a lot about myself. And give something back. To the world. To nature. To the animals and also to the people affected by poverty, war, etc. With my time and my means I want to do something good and contribute to making the world a little bit better. My circumstances, if I would live my dream life, a fulfilled life, would allow me to do all this.

But how can I achieve this?

We live in a world ruled by money. We need money to enable us to do all this.... That is the sad truth. So how do you get so much money from where you are now? As for me, I do not have family resources to fall back on. I come from the (probably lower) middle class. As a half-orphan and independent woman, it is not possible for me in my environment to start studying now, which could hopefully enable me to have a career with corresponding earnings years later. Apart from the fact that the career path already misses my goal of having as much free time as possible, studying costs too much. If I want to maintain my standard of living (and the goal is to increase it significantly), I can't afford to quit to start another career. Whichever way I go, I don't get where I want to go. My options are limited and don't get me anywhere. I could try to make money through attention, clicks, and as a content creator. But let's face it. There are already countless influencers on the popular platforms these days.... There's so much new content being created and shared every day that it's mind boggling. And there's not even much that's new anymore. There's hardly any innovation anymore. The curve is flattening out. Everything has been done before in this or a similar way... It is inflationary. The markets are saturated, people are exhausted and disillusioned. If, in my opinion, you have the misfortune to have been born "only" into the middle class, then you soberingly realize that you will not come to wealth in the normal way (whether through the path of your career or through inheritance, for example). That's why I write my desire to receive a sum of money so freely. I've come to realize that under normal circumstances, I can never make it to where I want to go. Thus, I am dependent on outside help. Whether through luck or kindness... We live in a time in which, at least in my cultural circles, the gap between rich and poor is so wide that it is hardly realistic to change it. The redistribution of wealth from the bottom to the top has now progressed to such an extent that it has taken on a life of its own due to the balance of power. The rich are getting richer and richer, and poverty continues to increase on the other side. Even the middle class is increasingly threatening to slide downward. This is related to capitalism and its roots. (The Cantillon effect is also a good keyword. The whole system is so sick, the world order in flux. I have to think of Ray Dalio's book "Principles for Dealing with the Changing World Order: Why Nations Succeed and Fail ").

Let's get back to capitalism and its origins and effects. I am convinced that the whole system works in favour of the rich and at the expense of everyone else. It has taken on a life of its own over centuries and gained momentum. In the meantime, the point of no return has been passed. I will elaborate on this in a future post.

So, what now? Through normal wage work I will never be able to realize my wishes and dreams only approximately. So either I wait for a miracle, marry rich or surrender to my life of misfortune....