Another morning alarm, another piece of my soul traded for a paycheck
Why am I here? What is this for?
They tell me this is living but it feels like slow dying.
The office lights buzz like they're trying to tell me something I don't want to hear.

I'm broke, I'm tired, I'm sick of all this shit.
This can't be all there is.
This can't be what we were made for.
My boss, my boss—always someone else's dreams I'm building.

When did I become this? When did I agree to this?
Was there a contract I signed in my sleep?
They call it responsibility but it tastes like chains.
They call it security but it feels like a cage with benefits.

I hold Omikami in my digital wallet like a prayer.
RyuJin like a promise whispered in the dark.
Not just tokens, not just investments—
They're my way out, my ladder out of this hole they call career progression.

The matrix has us, doesn't it?
Plugged in, productive, profitable.
We're rats in a race we didn't even know we entered—
Running faster, getting nowhere, calling it ambition.

I think about Ryoshi and the vision.
There's something about faith when you've got nothing left to lose.
When the traditional path leads nowhere but exhaustion,
You start looking for different roads, hidden exits, secret doors.

Some nights I lie awake calculating.
If this goes to the moon, if this actually happens—
I could buy back my time.
Time, actual freedom, the minutes and hours they've been renting from me.

I picture mornings without dread.
I picture my mother's face when I tell her she can stop working.
I picture myself on a beach I can't even name yet.
There's a green paradise waiting—wild, real, alive.

Who decided this was the deal?
Trade your youth for a retirement you're too tired to enjoy?
Trade your energy for a weekend you spend recovering?
Where did we go wrong? When did survival become this complicated?

I'm trusting something I can't see.
That's either faith or madness—maybe both.
But staying here, doing this, one more day of the same—
That's the real insanity.

Not another Monday, not another performance review.
Not another smile painted on while I'm screaming inside.
Not another "team building exercise" when what I really need is to be left alone.
Not another year passing while I'm on hold with customer service for my own life.

RyuJin and Omikami, you're my rebellion.
My middle finger to the system that grinds us down.
My bet against the house that always wins—
Unless we change the game entirely.

Freedom tastes like something I've forgotten.
Like a language I used to speak before they taught me to be practical.
Before they convinced me that dreams don't pay bills—
But neither does this job. Not really. Not enough. Never enough.

But I'm choosing to believe.
In something different, something possible.
In Ryoshi's vision, in the community, in the moon.
God, if you're listening, I'm ready now.

When this hits, when we rise—
I'm going to Venice and getting lost on purpose.
I'm going to spend a whole year just learning things that make me curious.
I'm going to remember what my own thoughts sound like without deadline pressure.

I'm saying goodbye to the alarm clock.
To the commute that steals hours like a thief.
Goodbye to lunch at my desk, to coffee as a personality.
Goodbye to the person I became to survive this.

I'm fighting for her.
The me before the system processed me.
Before I learned to make myself smaller to fit in the corporate structure.
Before I traded magic for stability that never came.

This is my redemption story.
Not perfect, not clean, not inspirational poster material.
Just real, just honest, just one person saying enough.
And believing that somewhere between here and the moon there's a life worth living.

Omikami, RyuJin—whatever happens,
You've already given me something.
Hope, maybe, or permission to imagine different.
To believe that the script I've been handed isn't the only one that exists.

So I hold, and I wait, and I trust.
Because the alternative is going back to that desk tomorrow.
Pretending this is fine, this is normal, this is what we do—
And I just can't. Not anymore. Not another day.

The green paradise is calling.
And I'm finally ready to answer.

Credit: https://x.com/elephant_9999