I'm not 100% sure what's been going on with me in terms of writing. Actually, I do, and it's all to do with work.

I'm supposed to be using writing in order to release some of the tension that I've been feeling, to get some of the crap inside outside of my head, and to use it as an outlet. I've definitely not been doing myself justice in this regard, and today I've decided to just let fingers flow onto a slab of glass and just hit the road hard. I'm going straight out until I stop.

I've been listening to the great Tim Dillon on the Are You Garbage podcast. It's been hilarious to listen to what, as the hosts say, is classified as classy versus trashy and sometimes I find myself in between two things. America, as a whole, has a culture of quantity over quality, and that's one of the themes I have noticed on that podcast: trashy things are essentially cheap, overbloated, over-sugared, quantity-enhanced choices, while the quality choices are more expensive, thought out, et cetera.

Growing up in Staten Island in the early to mid-2000s without a car didn't really present with a lot of choices, but growing up in a South Asian household comandeered by strict business owners made us quite aware of the choices, at least numerically if not qualitatively, we made. I'm pretty happy to say that I was given a lot of love and care at home, but choices were, as I would probably be generous in saying, somewhat limited. Not in terms of procurement: on the contrary, sometimes there was too much choice, but some things were just not good. I'm not sure where I'm going with this, but I'd like to move on because my fingers are working faster than my brain.

Work has been tough: I feel like I have a billion things to do and a billion more on the horizon. Doing the 75 Hard is making me very aware of the level of stress I'm carrying but going through this process right now is making me very constrained in terms of what is and isn't allowed. I refuse to restart as is required by the rules, so I'm sticking with it, but Christ Almighty I can go for some chocolate right now (no sugar!). Also, a gallon of water really makes you want to pee.

I want to shower now but still want to keep the momentum of writing going so I'll keep at this for a few more minutes. I'm happy with the way in which I've been handling my exercise routines, in that I'm being conscious of going outside (again, another side effect of the 75 Hard). Going out for morning walks or morning bike rides really does have a positive start to the day: you feel the blood flowing, muscles loosening, fresh air, and good conversation if nothing else. I'm excited to keep this going, and I'll keep you posted on how my progress is going. Perhaps I'll post progress pics. Perhaps not. Let's see.

I'm cold and sweaty now, so I'm going to take a shower. Part of my to do list is to take a cold shower so I'll suck it up and get that done. Let's get after it today and revisit our thoughts tomorrow.

Vivek.