[INTERNAL][CONFIDENTIAL]
MERGERS & APPROPRIATIONS - October NewsletterπΌ
Dear All,
Welcome to the Mergers and Appropriations October Newsletter.
This newsletter is classified as internal communication and highly confidential. Do not distribute outside The Firm.
Mergers:
The Firm has been approached numerous times for merger proposals but The Chairman has outright rejected these offers on the basis that no entity is larger or more powerful than The Firm. To quote our esteemed Chairman:
βNext to enjoying ourselves, the next greatest pleasure consists in preventing others from enjoying themselves, or more generally, in the acquisition of powerβ
Appropriations:
The Firm has lofty ambitions to grow in influence and stature. We have secured appropriations for the following growth projects:
1. [REDACTED]-Net ARR +69mπ
2. [REDACTED]-Net ARR +420mπ
More details will be released as we progress.
Kind Regards,
M&A Department
π€
[DO NOT PRINT]