one A few days ago, I attended a wedding with my friends. The groom is our college classmate. When we were happily watching the bridegroom and bride drink a glass of wine, the strange aunt sitting next to her friend suddenly whispered to her, "do you have a boyfriend?" "Not yet." "When you're old, it's time to find someone with a house. In this way, you can save a lot of things in the future. It's all experience. It's good for you." The aunt has a confident face. The friend gave a "um", turned his face and moved in the direction I sat, and didn't want to continue this topic. But the aunt still insisted: "Oh, I tell you, you're 26 now, right? It's hard to find someone after this age. Take advantage of these two years to find someone and listen to me." My friend felt embarrassed, smiled, and then took me to another table. The sentence "I'm for you" has almost become a must-have skill at the end of chat, and accompanied by every choice of us to go to school, choose a job, resign, find a partner, get married and have children. Whenever you meet a fork in the road, you will hear countless "for your own good" suggestions. The implication of this sentence is like: all your choices are wrong, you must listen to me. two A variety show specifically discussed whether the sentence "I'm for you" is reasonable. A guest said in the program: it's great to be a kind person and be good to others, but you don't have to prove your kindness. Time will prove it. Many people think that saying "I'm for you" is painstaking. In fact, when giving advice to people around you, it's good to directly analyze the pros and cons. With the words "I'm for your own good", it often seems that you stand on the height of "absolutely right" and deprive the other party of the right to try and make mistakes. This practice sometimes crosses the boundaries of interpersonal communication. No matter how close a relationship is, you can't lose your sense of propriety. If you think you are familiar and cross the border, it is easy to get angry. In the previously popular TV series Ode to joy, Andy's working style has always been commendable. In the face of the emotional crisis between Qiu YingYing and Yingqin, Qu Xiao gauze, who is famous for upholding justice, directly beat Yingqin in the underground parking lot and angered Yingqin's mother. Although the audience shouted happily, it could not be accepted by the parties. In the final analysis, it was Qiu Yingying's own choice. Andy's approach is to care without interference, which is obviously much more measured. As friends, we should respect their values. In case of different opinions, we can kindly remind them, but we don't have to intervene too much. There is a saying that has always impressed me: the so-called boundary means to stop there. Many seemingly well intentioned interventions are under the banner of care and love. They have crossed the boundary. three Yesterday, my cousin who just went to college called me to complain about the bad relationship with her roommate because she always used her cosmetics without her consent. My cousin gently reminded me several times, but I still found that my neatly placed cosmetics often moved their position inexplicably, so I lost my temper with my roommate and was rejected by the other party: we are so familiar with each other. What's the matter with use. In the final analysis, it is still the problem of unclear boundary of interpersonal communication. Everyone has the so-called "psychological boundary", which refers to the limit we can accept psychologically. If we exceed a certain range, we will feel forced. In life, we often have such experience. Sometimes our starting point is good. We want to be good to a person, but it hurts the dignity of others. Because for the good of a person, we must use the right method and say it in the right way. Otherwise, we are wholeheartedly good for him, but he is wholeheartedly disgusted. four Similarly, we should not infringe on the psychological boundaries of others, but also guard our own psychological boundaries. There is a typical character in the idol drama - the post it note girl. She is a textbook of "irresistible" personality and always accepts other people's requirements. Even if it goes against one's wishes and is not in one's own plan, one should also grievance oneself and accommodate others. In the face of other people's polite thanks, but also squeeze out a polite smile: nothing, nothing, just a little busy. In fact, most of these people are unhappy because they don't know how to refuse other people's requirements, so their bottom line is reduced again and again. This is also a manifestation of unclear psychological boundaries, which often puts oneself in a state of contradiction and entanglement. The communication between people is sometimes very subtle. Some people say: people are like hedgehogs in the cold winter. If they lean too close to each other, they will feel tingling; If we are too far away from each other, we will feel cold again. Only by keeping a proper distance and clarifying your boundaries can you have simple interpersonal relationships and live easily.

one A few days ago, I attended a wedding with my friends. The groom is our college classmate. When we were happily watching the bridegroom and bride drink a glass of wine, the strange aunt sitting next to her friend suddenly whispered to her, "do you have a boyfriend?" "Not yet." "When you're old, it's time to find someone with a house. In this way, you can save a lot of things in the future. It's all experience. It's good for you." The aunt has a confident face. The friend gave a "um", turned his face and moved in the direction I sat, and didn't want to continue this topic. But the aunt still insisted: "Oh, I tell you, you're 26 now, right? It's hard to find someone after this age. Take advantage of these two years to find someone and listen to me." My friend felt embarrassed, smiled, and then took me to another table. The sentence "I'm for you" has almost become a must-have skill at the end of chat, and accompanied by every choice of us to go to school, choose a job, resign, find a partner, get married and have children. Whenever you meet a fork in the road, you will hear countless "for your own good" suggestions. The implication of this sentence is like: all your choices are wrong, you must listen to me. two A variety show specifically discussed whether the sentence "I'm for you" is reasonable. A guest said in the program: it's great to be a kind person and be good to others, but you don't have to prove your kindness. Time will prove it. Many people think that saying "I'm for you" is painstaking. In fact, when giving advice to people around you, it's good to directly analyze the pros and cons. With the words "I'm for your own good", it often seems that you stand on the height of "absolutely right" and deprive the other party of the right to try and make mistakes. This practice sometimes crosses the boundaries of interpersonal communication. No matter how close a relationship is, you can't lose your sense of propriety. If you think you are familiar and cross the border, it is easy to get angry. In the previously popular TV series Ode to joy, Andy's working style has always been commendable. In the face of the emotional crisis between Qiu YingYing and Yingqin, Qu Xiao gauze, who is famous for upholding justice, directly beat Yingqin in the underground parking lot and angered Yingqin's mother. Although the audience shouted happily, it could not be accepted by the parties. In the final analysis, it was Qiu Yingying's own choice. Andy's approach is to care without interference, which is obviously much more measured. As friends, we should respect their values. In case of different opinions, we can kindly remind them, but we don't have to intervene too much. There is a saying that has always impressed me: the so-called boundary means to stop there. Many seemingly well intentioned interventions are under the banner of care and love. They have crossed the boundary. three Yesterday, my cousin who just went to college called me to complain about the bad relationship with her roommate because she always used her cosmetics without her consent. My cousin gently reminded me several times, but I still found that my neatly placed cosmetics often moved their position inexplicably, so I lost my temper with my roommate and was rejected by the other party: we are so familiar with each other. What's the matter with use. In the final analysis, it is still the problem of unclear boundary of interpersonal communication. Everyone has the so-called "psychological boundary", which refers to the limit we can accept psychologically. If we exceed a certain range, we will feel forced. In life, we often have such experience. Sometimes our starting point is good. We want to be good to a person, but it hurts the dignity of others. Because for the good of a person, we must use the right method and say it in the right way. Otherwise, we are wholeheartedly good for him, but he is wholeheartedly disgusted. four Similarly, we should not infringe on the psychological boundaries of others, but also guard our own psychological boundaries. There is a typical character in the idol drama - the post it note girl. She is a textbook of "irresistible" personality and always accepts other people's requirements. Even if it goes against one's wishes and is not in one's own plan, one should also grievance oneself and accommodate others. In the face of other people's polite thanks, but also squeeze out a polite smile: nothing, nothing, just a little busy. In fact, most of these people are unhappy because they don't know how to refuse other people's requirements, so their bottom line is reduced again and again. This is also a manifestation of unclear psychological boundaries, which often puts oneself in a state of contradiction and entanglement. The communication between people is sometimes very subtle. Some people say: people are like hedgehogs in the cold winter. If they lean too close to each other, they will feel tingling; If we are too far away from each other, we will feel cold again. Only by keeping a proper distance and clarifying your boundaries can you have simple interpersonal relationships and live easily.