We don't know each other that well. Don't talk too deeply Recently, Jiajia, a new colleague of the Department, is a newly graduated college student. He is very energetic every day. Because except for her, the Department is all post-80s, and everyone is willing to communicate and talk more with young people. As a result, in a few weeks, few people took the initiative to talk to Jiajia again. I found that every time my colleagues in the Department wanted to discuss some problems in work and life with Jiajia, Jiajia would always say something "out of her heart", which made the scene very embarrassing. At a department dinner not long after she arrived, before talking a few words, she said to her colleagues at the table, "you know what? Xiao Zhang from the design department next door is very close to her leader. They often go to and from work together. Tut tut Tut, I'll tell you." For a moment, the atmosphere became awkward. What she didn't know was that Xiao Zhang and her leader were brothers and sisters. They lived in the same community; What she doesn't know is that the male colleague sitting next to her at dinner is Xiao Zhang's boyfriend. On another occasion, several colleagues gathered around Xiao Li to see the photos of his newly renovated new house. Jiajia took a look and began to gush: "now that the house price is so high, it must shrink soon, and the state will certainly introduce policies to restrict the purchase. Buying a house now must suffer a loss. I don't intend to buy it now, and my parents are waiting for me to decide the time to pay for me." Colleagues looked at each other and walked away with a laugh. Several female colleagues came to complain to me, saying that when Jiajia was alone with them, she vomited bitterness. The contents of her complaints were the same, such as high work pressure, young and tired. After complaining, she added, "I really treat you as a friend. This has only been said to you." Colleagues feel helpless. Do we know each other that well? Confucius said, "it's a slip of the tongue if you don't speak to him." If the other party is not your old friend and confidant, and you don't know each other well, you only care about what Chang wants to say. Have you ever thought that we are not so familiar, and we can't hear your "heartfelt words" from the bottom of your heart. The listener is intentional and the speaker is unintentional. The relationship between them is indifferent, but you look like "taking out your heart and lungs". I am embarrassed and you are embarrassed. You think your honest advice is against your ears. In fact, it sounds strange to me; You think you talk loudly, but in fact, it sounds to me that you have nothing to say and can't make deep friends. It's a gentleman's rule to talk in a shallow way. If you don't know how friendly you are with each other, they will not feel good about you, but will stay away from you.

Telling jokes doesn't mean you have a sense of humor When I was in college, a male classmate laughed. Maybe it was because he had the word "laugh" in his name and loved to tell jokes. But every time, when everyone was talking about other topics in full swing, he insisted on inserting a joke. There are many times when everyone is clearly discussing movie stars. He has to tell a joke about borrowing money. Everyone is clearly telling each other's embarrassing stories. He has to insert a number joke. Everyone gave him face and smiled symbolically, but every time he told a joke, it was the end of the warm atmosphere. At the classmate party some time ago, Tianxiao also came. Unlike in college, he no longer interrupted everywhere and insisted on cramming his unpleasant jokes into it. Instead, he listened to everyone with a smile and nodded in agreement. Everyone was discussing antiques and showing off their ancestral treasures. Tianxiao finally said, "speaking of this ancestral treasure, my family actually has one. That day I asked my mother, but my mother said I had seen it long ago." Everyone looked at him one after another and wanted to hear what valuable treasure his family had. "I'm also surprised. As a result, my mother trembled and brought me a mirror, looked at me and said, come and see our ancestral ugliness." Everyone was quiet for a while and burst out laughing. Everyone laughed and said that your mother is really a real mother. It's not easy to laugh at you. They talked about their parents' fun. Instead of being destroyed, the atmosphere became more heated and noisy. Later, I asked Tianxiao how it changed so much that it would suddenly make a joke. He told me that when he first went to work, he once had dinner with many big leaders. His supervisor thought he was good at telling jokes, so he motioned him to tell one. As a result, he opened his mouth, which was a joke satirizing corrupt officials, turning all the leaders green. From then on, Tianxiao will no longer tell jokes, but look at the right time and tell his own experience or other words with humor. Many people think that telling a joke means they have a sense of humor. In fact, that's not the case. A sense of humor and a joke are two things. A sense of humor can drive the topic, make the conversation deeper or wider, but an untimely joke may end the topic and make others don't know what to answer. If you just force the ready-made jokes and jokes you see on the Internet into our conversation, I will think you jump. You had a good conversation, but you have to end it abruptly. It's easy to talk to people with a sense of humor, and they will gradually catch up with this sense of humor. It's also very interesting to say ordinary things in life. Talking to people who can only copy mechanically jokes is very tired. They can't laugh and don't say anything. They can't even say anything.

Appreciate, but also know where to appreciate Once there were two people in the company competing for the position of sales director. Both of them have strong business ability, and the boss has a headache. I don't know who is more suitable for promotion. So the boss inspected the sales department for a few days and finally appointed colleague a. I was puzzled at that time, because I heard that a's business ability seemed a little inferior to B, so I went to inquire with my good friend. My friend told me that if he chooses, he also hopes that a will be their department director, because B is always flattering the leader. As long as the official is older and more blind than him, he can say it. A friend said that once they met several leaders in the elevator. The boss was a little fat and took up a lot of space in the elevator. They crowded on the other side. As a result, B actually said that the boss maintained his body well and wanted to learn from him and practice his muscles. "Who knows that the boss has diabetes is because he does not exercise, although the boss is willing to take it, but obviously do not want to talk with him, this is not to fart the horse leg." My friend disdains B's behavior and kisses again and again. I hurriedly asked if a took the opportunity to praise the boss? The friend said, "of course, there are compliments. Who can't show up and say something nice when he sees the big boss? A saw the pen the boss didn't put in his suit pocket. He praised the boss for his good choice of pen, which is the best one in that brand. The boss was interested as soon as he heard it, and the two talked about the pen experience of various brands together. You see, this is the right place for compliments!" No one is a fool, and leaders don't like to listen to praise. What's more, no one will like to listen to the outrageous praise of "lying with their eyes open". Praising others in life is conducive to interpersonal communication, but praise should also be mentioned in others' hearts. When there are pictures of children on the desk of colleagues, they boast that the children are cute and beautiful; Friends always carry books with them, so they boast that they are well read and knowledgeable. Find what others want to show and say the praise they want to hear, so as to shorten the distance between people, be able to speak and do things well.

No matter how much you say, it's better to be right "China Poetry conference" made Dong Qing, the "first sister of CCTV" angry again. Everyone was impressed by her huge vocabulary reserve and her temperament of "having poetry and Book Spirit from China", and she was no inferior to the contestants. She recited poems quickly. Judge Kang Zhen said that Xue Baochai's "good wind depends on strength", and Dong Qing could immediately pick it up and "send me to Qingyun". After the female engineer contestant who supported Azerbaijan in designing the railway came to power, Dong Qing praised her with a poem by Zhan Tianyou, the father of Chinese Railway: "if my body can crawl into a railway track in China, it will be a great blessing for my rough life." I gave ye saining's "I remember" to a father on the stage, "how gentle I was at that time, when the petals fell into your hair. When you leave, my heart will not cool. Thinking of you is as happy as reading my favorite words." The blind father of the contestant was encouraged by the poem of the blind Borges, "God has given me a vast sea of books and a pair of invisible eyes. Even so, I still secretly imagine that heaven is like a library." The female contestant praised Dongqing, "beauty should take jade as bone and snow as skin, and more importantly, poetry as heart. Your beauty is fresh and meaningful." After the program, Dong Qing was interviewed, but she didn't think she was very talented. She said: "maybe because the poetry conference involves a wide range of topics, some of them happen to be in my knowledge and should be with you. I won't blindly show my reserve of poetry or show myself." She is a professional host. She knows when to speak, what to say, how to control the scene, how to mobilize the scene atmosphere, and how to guide the audience into the poetic mood. No matter how much you say, it's better to say just right. No matter how loud the response is, it's better to understand one sentence. Being able to speak is to speak properly and is the highest EQ in life. Only by mastering the discretion of speaking can we expand the size of life.

We don't know each other that well. Don't talk too deeply Recently, Jiajia, a new colleague of the Department, is a newly graduated college student. He is very energetic every day. Because except for her, the Department is all post-80s, and everyone is willing to communicate and talk more with young people. As a result, in a few weeks, few people took the initiative to talk to Jiajia again. I found that every time my colleagues in the Department wanted to discuss some problems in work and life with Jiajia, Jiajia would always say something "out of her heart", which made the scene very embarrassing. At a department dinner not long after she arrived, before talking a few words, she said to her colleagues at the table, "you know what? Xiao Zhang from the design department next door is very close to her leader. They often go to and from work together. Tut tut Tut, I'll tell you." For a moment, the atmosphere became awkward. What she didn't know was that Xiao Zhang and her leader were brothers and sisters. They lived in the same community; What she doesn't know is that the male colleague sitting next to her at dinner is Xiao Zhang's boyfriend. On another occasion, several colleagues gathered around Xiao Li to see the photos of his newly renovated new house. Jiajia took a look and began to gush: "now that the house price is so high, it must shrink soon, and the state will certainly introduce policies to restrict the purchase. Buying a house now must suffer a loss. I don't intend to buy it now, and my parents are waiting for me to decide the time to pay for me." Colleagues looked at each other and walked away with a laugh. Several female colleagues came to complain to me, saying that when Jiajia was alone with them, she vomited bitterness. The contents of her complaints were the same, such as high work pressure, young and tired. After complaining, she added, "I really treat you as a friend. This has only been said to you." Colleagues feel helpless. Do we know each other that well? Confucius said, "it's a slip of the tongue if you don't speak to him." If the other party is not your old friend and confidant, and you don't know each other well, you only care about what Chang wants to say. Have you ever thought that we are not so familiar, and we can't hear your "heartfelt words" from the bottom of your heart. The listener is intentional and the speaker is unintentional. The relationship between them is indifferent, but you look like "taking out your heart and lungs". I am embarrassed and you are embarrassed. You think your honest advice is against your ears. In fact, it sounds strange to me; You think you talk loudly, but in fact, it sounds to me that you have nothing to say and can't make deep friends. It's a gentleman's rule to talk in a shallow way. If you don't know how friendly you are with each other, they will not feel good about you, but will stay away from you.

Telling jokes doesn't mean you have a sense of humor When I was in college, a male classmate laughed. Maybe it was because he had the word "laugh" in his name and loved to tell jokes. But every time, when everyone was talking about other topics in full swing, he insisted on inserting a joke. There are many times when everyone is clearly discussing movie stars. He has to tell a joke about borrowing money. Everyone is clearly telling each other's embarrassing stories. He has to insert a number joke. Everyone gave him face and smiled symbolically, but every time he told a joke, it was the end of the warm atmosphere. At the classmate party some time ago, Tianxiao also came. Unlike in college, he no longer interrupted everywhere and insisted on cramming his unpleasant jokes into it. Instead, he listened to everyone with a smile and nodded in agreement. Everyone was discussing antiques and showing off their ancestral treasures. Tianxiao finally said, "speaking of this ancestral treasure, my family actually has one. That day I asked my mother, but my mother said I had seen it long ago." Everyone looked at him one after another and wanted to hear what valuable treasure his family had. "I'm also surprised. As a result, my mother trembled and brought me a mirror, looked at me and said, come and see our ancestral ugliness." Everyone was quiet for a while and burst out laughing. Everyone laughed and said that your mother is really a real mother. It's not easy to laugh at you. They talked about their parents' fun. Instead of being destroyed, the atmosphere became more heated and noisy. Later, I asked Tianxiao how it changed so much that it would suddenly make a joke. He told me that when he first went to work, he once had dinner with many big leaders. His supervisor thought he was good at telling jokes, so he motioned him to tell one. As a result, he opened his mouth, which was a joke satirizing corrupt officials, turning all the leaders green. From then on, Tianxiao will no longer tell jokes, but look at the right time and tell his own experience or other words with humor. Many people think that telling a joke means they have a sense of humor. In fact, that's not the case. A sense of humor and a joke are two things. A sense of humor can drive the topic, make the conversation deeper or wider, but an untimely joke may end the topic and make others don't know what to answer. If you just force the ready-made jokes and jokes you see on the Internet into our conversation, I will think you jump. You had a good conversation, but you have to end it abruptly. It's easy to talk to people with a sense of humor, and they will gradually catch up with this sense of humor. It's also very interesting to say ordinary things in life. Talking to people who can only copy mechanically jokes is very tired. They can't laugh and don't say anything. They can't even say anything.

Appreciate, but also know where to appreciate Once there were two people in the company competing for the position of sales director. Both of them have strong business ability, and the boss has a headache. I don't know who is more suitable for promotion. So the boss inspected the sales department for a few days and finally appointed colleague a. I was puzzled at that time, because I heard that a's business ability seemed a little inferior to B, so I went to inquire with my good friend. My friend told me that if he chooses, he also hopes that a will be their department director, because B is always flattering the leader. As long as the official is older and more blind than him, he can say it. A friend said that once they met several leaders in the elevator. The boss was a little fat and took up a lot of space in the elevator. They crowded on the other side. As a result, B actually said that the boss maintained his body well and wanted to learn from him and practice his muscles. "Who knows that the boss has diabetes is because he does not exercise, although the boss is willing to take it, but obviously do not want to talk with him, this is not to fart the horse leg." My friend disdains B's behavior and kisses again and again. I hurriedly asked if a took the opportunity to praise the boss? The friend said, "of course, there are compliments. Who can't show up and say something nice when he sees the big boss? A saw the pen the boss didn't put in his suit pocket. He praised the boss for his good choice of pen, which is the best one in that brand. The boss was interested as soon as he heard it, and the two talked about the pen experience of various brands together. You see, this is the right place for compliments!" No one is a fool, and leaders don't like to listen to praise. What's more, no one will like to listen to the outrageous praise of "lying with their eyes open". Praising others in life is conducive to interpersonal communication, but praise should also be mentioned in others' hearts. When there are pictures of children on the desk of colleagues, they boast that the children are cute and beautiful; Friends always carry books with them, so they boast that they are well read and knowledgeable. Find what others want to show and say the praise they want to hear, so as to shorten the distance between people, be able to speak and do things well.

No matter how much you say, it's better to be right "China Poetry conference" made Dong Qing, the "first sister of CCTV" angry again. Everyone was impressed by her huge vocabulary reserve and her temperament of "having poetry and Book Spirit from China", and she was no inferior to the contestants. She recited poems quickly. Judge Kang Zhen said that Xue Baochai's "good wind depends on strength", and Dong Qing could immediately pick it up and "send me to Qingyun". After the female engineer contestant who supported Azerbaijan in designing the railway came to power, Dong Qing praised her with a poem by Zhan Tianyou, the father of Chinese Railway: "if my body can crawl into a railway track in China, it will be a great blessing for my rough life." I gave ye saining's "I remember" to a father on the stage, "how gentle I was at that time, when the petals fell into your hair. When you leave, my heart will not cool. Thinking of you is as happy as reading my favorite words." The blind father of the contestant was encouraged by the poem of the blind Borges, "God has given me a vast sea of books and a pair of invisible eyes. Even so, I still secretly imagine that heaven is like a library." The female contestant praised Dongqing, "beauty should take jade as bone and snow as skin, and more importantly, poetry as heart. Your beauty is fresh and meaningful." After the program, Dong Qing was interviewed, but she didn't think she was very talented. She said: "maybe because the poetry conference involves a wide range of topics, some of them happen to be in my knowledge and should be with you. I won't blindly show my reserve of poetry or show myself." She is a professional host. She knows when to speak, what to say, how to control the scene, how to mobilize the scene atmosphere, and how to guide the audience into the poetic mood. No matter how much you say, it's better to say just right. No matter how loud the response is, it's better to understand one sentence. Being able to speak is to speak properly and is the highest EQ in life. Only by mastering the discretion of speaking can we expand the size of life.