In China, the doctrine of the mean has been emphasized since ancient times. Whether it is the warmth, kindness, humility, frugality and concession taught by the ancient motto, or the story of Kong rongrang pear heard since childhood, we should know humility and be humble before others. Careful words and deeds, no competition, imperceptibly become the hidden rules of our behavior. The unspoken rule of compromise is "embarrassed". There are two definitions of "embarrassed" Du Niang: shy, timid and embarrassed. The other is what can only be done or inconvenient due to human feelings. We only talk about the latter. This embarrassment is what we usually call "good people". Most of these people are kind-hearted and can't bear to hurt others. They always consider problems from the perspective of each other, leave grievances and difficulties to themselves, and leave convenience and happiness to others. I don't know how to refuse anything. I'm sorry to say "no".

1. Others say kindly that you are embarrassed to refuse. There is a kind of person who is justified in asking for help. He never considers whether it will cause you trouble or embarrass you, but only considers his own feelings. You should help him. If you don't help him, it will become a great crime. It's natural for you to help him well. If you don't help him well, it will become ruthless. As everyone knows, we don't owe anyone. It's friendship for me to help you, and it's reasonable not to help you. A few days ago, I received a phone call from Xiao Zhang, a subordinate I haven't contacted for a long time. It was a sentence to cover my face; "XX shop is opened by your relatives? My classmate's friends went today. It's cheaper." It's not like asking me for help. It's clearly an order. I had no choice but to call my relatives and make arrangements. And told Xiao Zhang that it was done. Who knows, he hung up the phone without even saying thank you. At that time, there were almost 10000 alpacas running in my heart. I was angry that I was in the way of friendship. I didn't say I lost money, but I put a hot face on my cold ass. Ungrateful person, his help to you has long become inertia, and his request is justified. Your embarrassment will only encourage him to advance an inch. For such people, you don't need to be humane, refuse decisively and say "no".

2. I'm sorry. I just want face and suffer. There is also a kind of people who think they have a good relationship with you and ask you for help, and their families also ask you for help. You can only compromise again and again because of your friendship. Unexpectedly, the other party takes an inch and regards you as a booster to expand his contacts. His relatives, friends, family, colleagues and even seven aunts have become the objects of his willingness to help others. He preaches everywhere about how strong his relationship with you is and how easy it is to do things. I don't know how much you want to help each time. S is like this. At that time, I was still in charge of the sales department. He bought his own car and asked me for help. I must be duty bound. But before long, he brought his relatives to buy a car, and then his colleagues. Later, his colleagues, colleagues' friends, friends' colleagues, sometimes those who can't touch the eight poles can also be found. It's really all kinds of fighting together. No matter who comes, he will peel off layers of skin. You bargain with me and play the card of friendship. I wish I could give him a car for nothing. Because of S's affection, every time I have to accompany a smiling face, fight with my mouth, and carry a hundred and twenty carefully. The most ridiculous thing is that s never thought it was causing me trouble. He also advocated helping me with business and asked me to treat him to dinner several times. I'm so dumb to eat yellow lotus. I can't tell how bitter it is. Finally, once he brought a friend to buy a car, because the request was too outrageous, I couldn't do it. Since then, it seems that my six relatives have refused to recognize me and committed great treachery. S and I have a growing resentment. A good friend has been spoiled by my embarrassment again and again. For many years, the friendship can only gradually drift away.

3. It's not wrong to refuse others. Don't let embarrassment hurt you. When I was in college, I had a good alumni. Said my mother was ill and borrowed money from me. Embarrassed to refuse, I was still a poor student at that time and told the whole living expenses given by my parents to the Jianghu for emergency. In the following days, because I didn't dare to tell my parents that I lent my living expenses to others. When I was short of money, I began to plan carefully for three meals a day, and my living standard plummeted. At that time, I really experienced that a penny could defeat a hero. But who knows, half a year later, there was no news about the repayment. I couldn't help asking her several times, but I swallowed it again because I was embarrassed, and then there was no money. Doesn't it say that problems that can be solved with money are not problems? It seems that feelings can be tested by money. Zhang Ailing said that there are many ways to destroy feelings, but the storm uprooted is to borrow money. I remember when I watched "Snail House", Su Chun said that guohaiping's line was very classic: "40000 is still your mother, 60000 will become our mother. If you don't borrow it, it's estimated that it's his mother." It really shows the true meaning of borrowing money. How many contradictions in life caused by borrowing money don't all start because of being embarrassed to refuse?

4. Sorry, it's just to help others wronged themselves. When you trust your relationship to find a friend and finally get a berth ticket at the critical juncture of the Spring Festival transportation, you are glad that the lower berth can have a comfortable rest. The eldest sister in the upper bunk said: young man, it's inconvenient for the eldest sister to go up and down the bunk. You're young and have sharp legs and feet. Let's change? You mean I don't change? I'm afraid of heights? My lower berth is hard won? When you can finally go home and rest after a busy day's work. Your colleagues throw you a plan, smile and praise your writing. You mean I'm tired. I really don't want to work overtime when I go home? You can't, because you're embarrassed and full of complaints, you can only go home and digest it slowly. For another example, you buy a limited edition of a famous work and take it as a treasure. Students come home and say they are borrowing for a few days. You think about your love book every day. When will you return? How can you ask? If the boat of friendship is overturned, which one is more and which one is less? Influenced by the Chinese concept of moral kidnapping, from bus seat giving to charitable donation, how many people understand that it's my duty to help you and not to help you.

5. Sorry, it's a disease. If it's not treated, it may kill people. Recently, I haven't been more civilized. All my friends know that classmate Wang was injured for doing good deeds. Not for anything else, but also because I'm sorry. He went to buy a power switch, which coincided with the dust storm in the north that day. I came across a barbecue stand near the door of the hardware store. The neighbors went to help and asked him to go too. Sorry, he followed without saying a word. Unexpectedly, he was injured by a falling iron frame, two fractures on his leg and contusion of soft tissue in his waist. He still lies recuperating after the operation. People won't cry with gratitude because he yells all his life when he sees injustice. It's very likely that he will be at war and face justice because of the problem of medical compensation. It's said that good people are difficult to do. I'm sorry. The price is really big. I broke my arms and legs accidentally, and almost became disabled. I can't take care of myself. Are you sick when you say you're sorry? It almost became an intestinal poison to kill yourself. I'm sorry. I don't want money. It's terrible.

6. Sorry, it's a double-edged sword. If you're not careful, you'll hurt others and yourself. Mr. Wang's glorious deeds of embarrassment are worth picking up. Last year's Mid Autumn Festival, classmate Wang's brother borrowed a car from him and said it was for the son of his sworn brother to marry a daughter-in-law. Due to the situation, they had to borrow from each other. According to the Murphy's law of truth, the car hit the front car at the rear of the provincial high-speed. Our three compartment car was hit into two compartments. With the hit vehicle, the loss caught up with six figures. Fortunately, there were no casualties, otherwise even I, the car owner, would be to blame. When faced with the problem of car repair and compensation, everyone grasped the weakness that classmate Wang had always been embarrassed about. Even the brother of a mother compatriot ignored our losses, failed to negotiate for many times and broke up unhappily. Classmate Wang finally did not give in because of the huge loss and offended everyone. "It was born from the same root, why is it too urgent to fry each other", a brother who was embarrassed to make a turn against him and looked like a stranger. Sometimes, you think being embarrassed is the best accomplishment for others, but you don't know it may bring greater harm to yourself and the other party. Sorry, it has become a double-edged sword. Stabbing others hurts yourself. Never let embarrassment become a stumbling block in your life, overcome the psychology of embarrassment, and keep in mind the 16 character policy of "distinguishing friends, daring to refuse, emphasizing principles and acting according to your ability". The simpler the interpersonal relationship, the better. If you can't do anything, refuse generously and simply say "no". Master comedian Chaplin said: learn to say "no", then your life will be much better! Please smile in the mirror, follow your heart, be confident and brave "sayNo", and stride forward.

In China, the doctrine of the mean has been emphasized since ancient times. Whether it is the warmth, kindness, humility, frugality and concession taught by the ancient motto, or the story of Kong rongrang pear heard since childhood, we should know humility and be humble before others. Careful words and deeds, no competition, imperceptibly become the hidden rules of our behavior. The unspoken rule of compromise is "embarrassed". There are two definitions of "embarrassed" Du Niang: shy, timid and embarrassed. The other is what can only be done or inconvenient due to human feelings. We only talk about the latter. This embarrassment is what we usually call "good people". Most of these people are kind-hearted and can't bear to hurt others. They always consider problems from the perspective of each other, leave grievances and difficulties to themselves, and leave convenience and happiness to others. I don't know how to refuse anything. I'm sorry to say "no".

1. Others say kindly that you are embarrassed to refuse. There is a kind of person who is justified in asking for help. He never considers whether it will cause you trouble or embarrass you, but only considers his own feelings. You should help him. If you don't help him, it will become a great crime. It's natural for you to help him well. If you don't help him well, it will become ruthless. As everyone knows, we don't owe anyone. It's friendship for me to help you, and it's reasonable not to help you. A few days ago, I received a phone call from Xiao Zhang, a subordinate I haven't contacted for a long time. It was a sentence to cover my face; "XX shop is opened by your relatives? My classmate's friends went today. It's cheaper." It's not like asking me for help. It's clearly an order. I had no choice but to call my relatives and make arrangements. And told Xiao Zhang that it was done. Who knows, he hung up the phone without even saying thank you. At that time, there were almost 10000 alpacas running in my heart. I was angry that I was in the way of friendship. I didn't say I lost money, but I put a hot face on my cold ass. Ungrateful person, his help to you has long become inertia, and his request is justified. Your embarrassment will only encourage him to advance an inch. For such people, you don't need to be humane, refuse decisively and say "no".

2. I'm sorry. I just want face and suffer. There is also a kind of people who think they have a good relationship with you and ask you for help, and their families also ask you for help. You can only compromise again and again because of your friendship. Unexpectedly, the other party takes an inch and regards you as a booster to expand his contacts. His relatives, friends, family, colleagues and even seven aunts have become the objects of his willingness to help others. He preaches everywhere about how strong his relationship with you is and how easy it is to do things. I don't know how much you want to help each time. S is like this. At that time, I was still in charge of the sales department. He bought his own car and asked me for help. I must be duty bound. But before long, he brought his relatives to buy a car, and then his colleagues. Later, his colleagues, colleagues' friends, friends' colleagues, sometimes those who can't touch the eight poles can also be found. It's really all kinds of fighting together. No matter who comes, he will peel off layers of skin. You bargain with me and play the card of friendship. I wish I could give him a car for nothing. Because of S's affection, every time I have to accompany a smiling face, fight with my mouth, and carry a hundred and twenty carefully. The most ridiculous thing is that s never thought it was causing me trouble. He also advocated helping me with business and asked me to treat him to dinner several times. I'm so dumb to eat yellow lotus. I can't tell how bitter it is. Finally, once he brought a friend to buy a car, because the request was too outrageous, I couldn't do it. Since then, it seems that my six relatives have refused to recognize me and committed great treachery. S and I have a growing resentment. A good friend has been spoiled by my embarrassment again and again. For many years, the friendship can only gradually drift away.

3. It's not wrong to refuse others. Don't let embarrassment hurt you. When I was in college, I had a good alumni. Said my mother was ill and borrowed money from me. Embarrassed to refuse, I was still a poor student at that time and told the whole living expenses given by my parents to the Jianghu for emergency. In the following days, because I didn't dare to tell my parents that I lent my living expenses to others. When I was short of money, I began to plan carefully for three meals a day, and my living standard plummeted. At that time, I really experienced that a penny could defeat a hero. But who knows, half a year later, there was no news about the repayment. I couldn't help asking her several times, but I swallowed it again because I was embarrassed, and then there was no money. Doesn't it say that problems that can be solved with money are not problems? It seems that feelings can be tested by money. Zhang Ailing said that there are many ways to destroy feelings, but the storm uprooted is to borrow money. I remember when I watched "Snail House", Su Chun said that guohaiping's line was very classic: "40000 is still your mother, 60000 will become our mother. If you don't borrow it, it's estimated that it's his mother." It really shows the true meaning of borrowing money. How many contradictions in life caused by borrowing money don't all start because of being embarrassed to refuse?

4. Sorry, it's just to help others wronged themselves. When you trust your relationship to find a friend and finally get a berth ticket at the critical juncture of the Spring Festival transportation, you are glad that the lower berth can have a comfortable rest. The eldest sister in the upper bunk said: young man, it's inconvenient for the eldest sister to go up and down the bunk. You're young and have sharp legs and feet. Let's change? You mean I don't change? I'm afraid of heights? My lower berth is hard won? When you can finally go home and rest after a busy day's work. Your colleagues throw you a plan, smile and praise your writing. You mean I'm tired. I really don't want to work overtime when I go home? You can't, because you're embarrassed and full of complaints, you can only go home and digest it slowly. For another example, you buy a limited edition of a famous work and take it as a treasure. Students come home and say they are borrowing for a few days. You think about your love book every day. When will you return? How can you ask? If the boat of friendship is overturned, which one is more and which one is less? Influenced by the Chinese concept of moral kidnapping, from bus seat giving to charitable donation, how many people understand that it's my duty to help you and not to help you.

5. Sorry, it's a disease. If it's not treated, it may kill people. Recently, I haven't been more civilized. All my friends know that classmate Wang was injured for doing good deeds. Not for anything else, but also because I'm sorry. He went to buy a power switch, which coincided with the dust storm in the north that day. I came across a barbecue stand near the door of the hardware store. The neighbors went to help and asked him to go too. Sorry, he followed without saying a word. Unexpectedly, he was injured by a falling iron frame, two fractures on his leg and contusion of soft tissue in his waist. He still lies recuperating after the operation. People won't cry with gratitude because he yells all his life when he sees injustice. It's very likely that he will be at war and face justice because of the problem of medical compensation. It's said that good people are difficult to do. I'm sorry. The price is really big. I broke my arms and legs accidentally, and almost became disabled. I can't take care of myself. Are you sick when you say you're sorry? It almost became an intestinal poison to kill yourself. I'm sorry. I don't want money. It's terrible.

6. Sorry, it's a double-edged sword. If you're not careful, you'll hurt others and yourself. Mr. Wang's glorious deeds of embarrassment are worth picking up. Last year's Mid Autumn Festival, classmate Wang's brother borrowed a car from him and said it was for the son of his sworn brother to marry a daughter-in-law. Due to the situation, they had to borrow from each other. According to the Murphy's law of truth, the car hit the front car at the rear of the provincial high-speed. Our three compartment car was hit into two compartments. With the hit vehicle, the loss caught up with six figures. Fortunately, there were no casualties, otherwise even I, the car owner, would be to blame. When faced with the problem of car repair and compensation, everyone grasped the weakness that classmate Wang had always been embarrassed about. Even the brother of a mother compatriot ignored our losses, failed to negotiate for many times and broke up unhappily. Classmate Wang finally did not give in because of the huge loss and offended everyone. "It was born from the same root, why is it too urgent to fry each other", a brother who was embarrassed to make a turn against him and looked like a stranger. Sometimes, you think being embarrassed is the best accomplishment for others, but you don't know it may bring greater harm to yourself and the other party. Sorry, it has become a double-edged sword. Stabbing others hurts yourself. Never let embarrassment become a stumbling block in your life, overcome the psychology of embarrassment, and keep in mind the 16 character policy of "distinguishing friends, daring to refuse, emphasizing principles and acting according to your ability". The simpler the interpersonal relationship, the better. If you can't do anything, refuse generously and simply say "no". Master comedian Chaplin said: learn to say "no", then your life will be much better! Please smile in the mirror, follow your heart, be confident and brave "sayNo", and stride forward.