For the past two weeks, the melody of Schumann's Träumerei (Dreaming) has been stuck in my head. Composed in 1838, it's part of his Kinderszenen (Scenes from Childhood), a cycle of songs he wrote reminiscing his childhood.

It's also the one piece out of that cycle of 8 that is most recognized and often played as a standalone piece by pianists, as an encore, or as part of their program.

Chances are, you've come across the theme even if you're unfamiliar with classical music. It's the epitome of romanticism. Tenderness meets intense emotions, nostalgia, and longing for something that can never be experienced again. The melody takes us on a journey into the land of dreams.

It's a masterpiece. And that at less than 3 min length.

But it's just one facet of his works. Despite being one of the greatest composers of the 19th century, he has not always received recognition beyond a few of his piano works.

Even today, more YT videos are talking about why you should listen to Brahms than Schumann.

"He started out as a genius and ended as a talent"

Felix Draeseke

Some even went as far as calling him a second-rate composer. It was only in the late 20th century that musicologists started re-evaluating his works.

As so often, the reception of musical works ties closely to the composers' lives. Schumann was no different, and his tragic passing in a mental asylum did little to aid popularity.

In the 19th century, it wasn't as en vogue to promote being crazy as it is today.

The story of Schumann is one of intense love, romance, and creation. But it's also the story of tragedy, insanity, and struggles with inner and outer demons.

The beginnings

Robert Schumann was born on June 8th, 1810, in the small German town of Zwickau. Son to a bookseller and novelist father, he grew up surrounded by literature. At seven years old, he picked up piano lessons. During his teens, he became interested in literature and started writing while continuing to work on his pianist skills.

In 1826, Robert's father passed away, and his sister committed suicide. Schumann enrolled as a law student since his father had made it a condition for him to take a 3-year study course before getting any of the money.

Nevertheless, with his head still deeply interested in literature, he spent his time reading Jean Paul Richter and visiting all the local pubs instead of studying law. It was also then that he discovered Schubert, whose music inspired him to pursue the Piano and composition more seriously.

Friedrich Wieck, a renowned musician, became his teacher. A choice that would drastically impact the course of Schumann's life.

A failed pianist

When he moved in with the Wieck family, he met Clara. The young girl was a child prodigy, trained by her father to be a concert pianist, and excelled at it. Robert was impressed with her playing, the complicated cords, and the fast runs up and down the scale.

Sometimes, they played together, and he read stories to her. After all, she was still a kid.

For Robert, these were moments of bliss. He knew no balance, either practicing for days obsessively or drinking through the night only to spend days depressed in bed afterward.

Torments of the most terrible melancholy. I was gripped by a fixed idea of going mad.

Robert Schumann

It's a struggle he'd never overcome.

The aspiring pianist didn't know when to stop. In his obsession to improve, he even devised an apparatus that helped him stretch the fingers to increase their ability to move independently and hit chords.

He overdoes it, forever ruining any prospect of becoming a concert pianist at 22. With some sense of practicality, he decided that if he couldn't play, he would focus on becoming a composer. And a music critic.

To have a platform, he started a music publication dedicated to reviewing the works of classical artists called "Neue Zeitschrift fur Musik," which is still published to this day, more than 150 years later.

Friedrich Wieck has no tolerance for Robert's excessive behavior drinking and throws him out of the house.

A love story

After moving out, he started missing Clara. They frequently exchange letters, and eventually, the word love is written in ink on paper. But Clara is busy touring Europe and playing concerts, so it would be another two years until they meet again.

The 30s would turn out to be a crucial period for Schumann's personal and artistic development.

He composes countless piano pieces, often inspired by his love for Clara and her father's opposition to this connection. At some point, Clara's father forbids her from contacting Robert, leading Schumann into another phase of desperation during which he manically composes new works.

It's also the time he writes "memories of childhood," reminiscing on his own, with an eye on having children with Clara.

Another cycle from that period is the "Kreisleriana," a composition in eight movements that became a vital piece of the Romantic period - composed in just four days. It's a dramatic piece, leaning on E.T.A Hoffman's character, Johannes Kreisler.

Listening to it, one can't help but wonder if Schumann is reflecting on the parts of his personality.

At the end of 1839, he had composed a staggering 150 pieces.

1840, after a lawsuit against Friedrich Wieck, the couple finally married. Back in those days, women had to be 21 or have the approval of both parents to wed.

At 21, Clara is a renowned concert pianist, eager to pursue her career. Nevertheless, they welcome their first of what will be eight children just one year later.

"it would be best if he composed for orchestra; his imagination cannot find sufficient scope on the piano... His compositions are all orchestral in feeling"

- Clara Schumann in her diary

In high spirits, Schumann composed his first Symphony, the Spring Symphony, in 1841. Quickly premiered, it puts Schumann on the Canvas as an Orchestral composer. He followed up with his second Symphony, which failed to woe listeners.

As he confessed to a friend in a letter, "One can tell how ill I was when writing this," about the 2nd movement of the Symphony, a movement that the conductor Simon Rattle interprets as a tragic, candid self-portrait of the composer. Twelve years later, Schumann reworked this Symphony, now known as his 4th.

First cracks

With children on the way and Clara hindered from going on tours, Schumann turned his composing habits around. Instead of relying on impromptu inspiration hitting him, he developed a routine of composing concerts, symphonies, and piano works.

Yet, Clara's ambitions to pursue her pianist career and Schuman's own are turning into a field of tension between the otherwise happy couple. During a tour to Copenhagen, Schumann only accompanies her up to Hamburg (halfway) before returning home to the children, ending in a series of self-reproaches from both parties.

At the same time, Clara was the one to premier his Piano works to new audiences, squeezing them in between all-time audience favorites, a practice maintained to this day. Because no one would want to listen to 1hr of atonal music.

After his hopes of becoming the next musical director in Leipzig's renowned Gewandhaus were shattered around 1843, the Schumanns moved to Dresden. The following years were characterized by sickness, with Schumann suffering from weak nerves, anxiety, and depression.

Schumann still managed to complete his technically 3rd Symphony, now known as the 2nd (talk about that not being confusing).

This Symphony marks a turning point in his life. Schumann suffered through a deep depression in the years leading up to it, and he even resigned from his post at his magazine. Despite small glimmers of better times, potentially aided by his success with the revolutionary Vormarz movement, things would gradually worsen.

In 1847, his dear friend Mendelssohn passed away. 1848 marked the time of the March Revolution sweeping Europe, triggered by discontent with the ruling party and fuelled by economic depression.

Schumann never found space in a revolution calling for loud voices like Wagner.

Entry of the Demons

After the revolution failed, Schumann felt abandoned and lost in Dresden. All his friends had left. 1850, the family moved to Dusseldorf, where Schumann became musical director. He regained his productivity for a while, composing his Third Symphony, "Die Rheinische," referencing the Rhein River.

It was composed in an attempt to create something that would be popular with the audience. The first three movements are in line with what listeners would expect, but it's in the 4th movement that dark presentiments enter.

Or, as the conductor Rattle notes, one can feel the inner demons Schumann was grappling with.

After reworking his 2nd, now 4th Symphony, it's well-received by the audience thanks to exuding more joy and lightness than the 1st version written during a depressive state.

At that time, the Schumann's marriage wasn't exactly going fine. Clara had realized she was pregnant again, marking the end of a planned concert tour, something she had dreamed of since age 19. In despair, she entrusts her diary

“My last good years are passing away, and my powers too—there is certainly reason enough for me to distress myself. I am more discouraged than I can say.”

Despite the positive reception of his 2nd 4th Symphony, the composer faced first calls to resign as a conductor and had just missed two previous concerts for being struck with nervous attacks. In 1953, he was fired.

Brahms

During that challenging time of his life, there was one bright spot. The couple spent time with the famous violinist Joseph Joachim and his 20-year-old pupil Johannes Brahms, whose genius Schumann would quickly recognize and foster. Convinced by Brahms' talent, Schumann would even push for publishing his works.

Schumann's knowledge of old music and extensive library would eventually enable Brahms to write his German requiem - a deep friendship developed. Yet, despite that encounter, Schumann's newly invigorated spirits would prove fleeting.

Eventually, it was Clara who would develop an even closer relationship with Brahms, triggering a regular exchange of letters - and potentially something beyond friendship. As Clara noted in her diary a few years later

“There is the most complete accord between us… It is not his youth that attracts me: not, perhaps, my flattered vanity. No, it is the fresh mind, the gloriously gifted nature, the noble heart, that I love in him.”

Decline

The riff between the couple deepened as the 9-year younger Clara found more in common with the younger Brahms and Joachim. In 1953, Schumann suffered a stroke.

In 1954, he started hearing voices. Initially angelic, they quickly turned into demons. While physically recovered, he throws his wedding ring into the Rhine and attempts to commit suicide. When rescued, he requests to be put in a mental asylum to recover.

It would mark the beginning of the last two years of his life.

The judgment over this last part of his life has torn the music historians into two opposing sections. One party justifies the behavior of his family and friends, who left him pretty much all alone. In contrast, others argue it was an unspeakable act of cruelty, tainting new music history.

The composer was isolated from his friends and family during his time in the asylum. The first letter from Clara 5 months later. He wasn't even told about the birth of his latest son.

He'd never read of Clara's Concert's success nor from Brahms as they instructed the asylum to keep these newspapers from him.

Joachim visited nine months later. And Clara only when the doctors predicted his imminent death. He'd not see his children again.

Despite his desire to be released and positive signs of recovery, it seems that all of these would be subordinated to the initial judgment over his illness.

To this day, it's a mystery what exactly the cause of his death was.

He died at 46, alone, largely rejected by a new ideal for music he had helped create.

Schumann, a modern man?

Schumann was a pioneer of new music and contributed to its development with his publication. Yet he's also the one marking the breaking point.

It's not a coincidence that he suffered. His childhood was still under the shadow of the previous wars, and during his 20s, he'd be torn between conservative ideals and the newer revolutionists' worldview. In him, the thin line between genius and madness seemingly blurred.

In many ways, the struggles he experienced in his marriage are those of a man trying to find his place in a world where the relationship between men and women is changing. He'd have liked to see Clara as the wife on his side, raising the kids and managing the household. But Clara was strong and wanted more. He'd often find himself in her shadow.

An anecdote goes that when the couple had a double portrait made, initially, the painter put Clara in front. Yet Robert insisted that he be placed in front, arguing the creative artist had to be in the foreground and the interpreter in the back.

His sickness, above all, seems nearly modern. It took on traits we see in modern sickness, such as depression and fragmenting of one's personality.

To this day, if he was sick, to begin with isn't proven. The question remains if he was rather just miserable, as many of his worst episodes were preceded by traumatic events.

From the beginning of the 19th century, there was a notion of new music being perceived as sick. It didn't match the ideal of beautiful music (Beethoven, Mozart, Schumann pre 1850)

Ironically, this would be held up against Schumann, who dedicated a large part of his writing to continue the line of the Conservative School, that of Beethoven and Mozart. Potentially contributing to his struggles.

In his last Violin Concert, Schumann clearly paved the way for who'd be coming next.

Violin Concert in d-Minor

Composed in 1853 and inspired by the encounter with Brahms, Schumann wouldn't live to see his concert premiere. Despite initial euphoria, Clara, Brahms, and Joachim drastically changed their opinion about it, refusing to publish the work they saw in it signs of his mental health struggles.

After Joachim's death, his son sold the rights to it, and eventually, the Schott publishing house printed the work. At this time, Schumann had assumed an important role in the national socialist's agenda, who were trying to build him up as the big German romantic after forbidding Mendelssohn's works.

In 1937, the concerto premiered, featuring a revised violin part. It formed part of a celebratory concert including works from Wagner and recitations of Goethe.

In December of the same year, the original was premiered in the US, played by one of the greatest violinists of the 20th century, Yehudi Menuhin, who remarked

"If Schumann wrote this concerto in insanity, I too would like to be insane."

The French-American conductor Vladimir Golschman wrote in 1937:

"This concerto is the [...] missing link of the violin literature; it is the bridge between the Beethoven and Brahms concertos. [...] One is struck with the fact that Brahms could never have been what he was without Schumann's influence."

Despite the positive reviews, it remains a piece that lives a shadow existence potentially tainted by the Nazi's attempt to turn it into a replacement for Mendelssohn's violin concerts.

Schumann's later works were undoubtedly difficult. They portrayed inner conflicts and deep emotions, which were not always pleasant to listen to. Schumann was highly introspective and would reference lyrical works in his piano pieces. He was intense, in good and bad.

He was torn between ideals and struggling to find a place in a society that often seemed to misunderstand him. He went unheard in a revolution that wanted only loud voices. His being was music, and he'd carry to the outer world what he felt inside.

A romantic through and through.

Besides Kinderszenen, one of my Schumann favorites is his Piano Concerto in A minor.

Those first few measures with the Piano's strong entrance, followed by the oboe with a soft melody, always get me.

I wrote this in pursuit of more context in what I consume this year. As a big classical music listener, I've always found Schumann fascinating. I grew up in a classical musicians' household and listened to audiobooks on composers' lives. I had a basic notion of his life, yet going down the rabbit hole these past two weeks made me realize there was much more to it.

Was he really sick or just projecting what society projected onto him back? We'll never know for sure.

What's certain is he took his feelings and put them out there for us to discover.

And I think that's beautiful.