You can't live without a word. It seems harmless and almost insignificant. However, it is deteriorating from the top to the bottom of your relationship. Check out your recent messages and emails to your friends. If you find the following sentence, you have been poisoned by the word and become a trapped beast. "I'd love to go out! But I'm busy now." "Sorry I didn't reply you earlier! I've been too busy lately." "Guess how I've been? As busy as usual!" I believe you have guessed that the word that steals your friend like a thief is "busy". It's time to uproot it from your social language. Admittedly, there is nothing wrong with being really busy - people who manage everything every day but still have good relationships do exist. It's not a busy state, but the word "busy" that drives away your friends. Next, I will propose three reasons for breaking up with the word "busy" and three ways to replace it.

1. Everyone is busy Nowadays, saying you are busy is almost the same as saying you are alive. Being busy is a sign of your importance, telling others that you are dependent on people and things. Now, the use of "busy" has been expanded to become a panacea. After ten years of working, I'm busy; I'm busy with my work; I'm busy relaxing during the holiday. "Busy" is no longer specific and has basically lost its meaning. Meaningless words can't tell others what you're going through, so they become a cancer of interpersonal relationships. In fact, meaningless dialogue has hindered the process of mutual understanding.

2. Easy derivative (negative) interpretation "I'm busy" attempts to fish in troubled waters to cover up the real reason why it's inconvenient for you to explain. Many people think you are busy at first, but the reason why they don't cover it up is that they will go out with you. Maybe you realize in the end that you hate them and don't dare to say the real reason. In other words, "busy" will be left blank, so that others can guess your real intention. And these guesses are often negative thinking. At worst, your friends think you seem to be using "I'm busy" to avoid explaining the reason to get rid of them.

3. It means "not now" "I'm busy" often means that you have more important things to do than your friends, which is understandable. Maybe you're taking care of children, maybe you're developing new products... You have countless reasonable reasons to make meeting friends less important because you're busy with something. But the point is that you don't say what you're doing, but just casually say "I'm busy". I mentioned in my previous article "five words that may kill friendship" that "not now" deepens the feeling that you are rejecting others. "Busy" is equivalent to "not now". It denies others' sense of existence and widens the distance between you. Although "busy" itself can not produce a sense of closeness, it doesn't mean that you can't tell others that you are "busy" in a way that can produce a sense of closeness. Here are some tips to tell your friends that you're busy and don't hurt your kindness.

4. Specific and clear Telling a friend what you're doing is a simple way to eliminate the blank created by "busy". Of course, it takes more time and energy, and may even become a challenge when you are too busy. But it's worth it, because the difference in the way of conveying semantics is very important. If you invite a friend to your birthday party, but she says, "although I want to go, I'm busy!" Or, she said, "I want to go, but Jack invited me to his karate game tonight. Save me a glass of champagne!" Feel the difference? The second statement does explain her reason, give you context, and express the meaning that she still wishes you to have a good time. The first statement, frankly speaking, is to shirk.

5. Establish time frame If you're really in a hurry to spend time at work or at home, it's helpful to tell your friends how long they'll last. For example, if you know that your product will be released within a month and you will have plenty of time after that, then express your desire to reconnect with your friends later. Even if the new product fails and the development time becomes two months, your friends will still appreciate your desire to reunite with them as soon as possible.

6. Decide whether to have a more in-depth dialogue It's time to face the dark side of "busy". Everyone knows that "I'm busy" can be a way to end an unwanted relationship. Children call it "ghost shadow" - disappear like a ghost without explanation. If you are using the word "busy" in this way, you should decide whether to have a deeper conversation with the person you are talking to. Because the deterioration of relations with friends is unpleasant, some friendships are worth fighting for. In some cases, "busy" breaks up a friendship, which will cause great harm to both sides. this is it! Try not to say "busy" and see what happens!

You can't live without a word. It seems harmless and almost insignificant. However, it is deteriorating from the top to the bottom of your relationship. Check out your recent messages and emails to your friends. If you find the following sentence, you have been poisoned by the word and become a trapped beast. "I'd love to go out! But I'm busy now." "Sorry I didn't reply you earlier! I've been too busy lately." "Guess how I've been? As busy as usual!" I believe you have guessed that the word that steals your friend like a thief is "busy". It's time to uproot it from your social language. Admittedly, there is nothing wrong with being really busy - people who manage everything every day but still have good relationships do exist. It's not a busy state, but the word "busy" that drives away your friends. Next, I will propose three reasons for breaking up with the word "busy" and three ways to replace it.

1. Everyone is busy Nowadays, saying you are busy is almost the same as saying you are alive. Being busy is a sign of your importance, telling others that you are dependent on people and things. Now, the use of "busy" has been expanded to become a panacea. After ten years of working, I'm busy; I'm busy with my work; I'm busy relaxing during the holiday. "Busy" is no longer specific and has basically lost its meaning. Meaningless words can't tell others what you're going through, so they become a cancer of interpersonal relationships. In fact, meaningless dialogue has hindered the process of mutual understanding.

2. Easy derivative (negative) interpretation "I'm busy" attempts to fish in troubled waters to cover up the real reason why it's inconvenient for you to explain. Many people think you are busy at first, but the reason why they don't cover it up is that they will go out with you. Maybe you realize in the end that you hate them and don't dare to say the real reason. In other words, "busy" will be left blank, so that others can guess your real intention. And these guesses are often negative thinking. At worst, your friends think you seem to be using "I'm busy" to avoid explaining the reason to get rid of them.

3. It means "not now" "I'm busy" often means that you have more important things to do than your friends, which is understandable. Maybe you're taking care of children, maybe you're developing new products... You have countless reasonable reasons to make meeting friends less important because you're busy with something. But the point is that you don't say what you're doing, but just casually say "I'm busy". I mentioned in my previous article "five words that may kill friendship" that "not now" deepens the feeling that you are rejecting others. "Busy" is equivalent to "not now". It denies others' sense of existence and widens the distance between you. Although "busy" itself can not produce a sense of closeness, it doesn't mean that you can't tell others that you are "busy" in a way that can produce a sense of closeness. Here are some tips to tell your friends that you're busy and don't hurt your kindness.

4. Specific and clear Telling a friend what you're doing is a simple way to eliminate the blank created by "busy". Of course, it takes more time and energy, and may even become a challenge when you are too busy. But it's worth it, because the difference in the way of conveying semantics is very important. If you invite a friend to your birthday party, but she says, "although I want to go, I'm busy!" Or, she said, "I want to go, but Jack invited me to his karate game tonight. Save me a glass of champagne!" Feel the difference? The second statement does explain her reason, give you context, and express the meaning that she still wishes you to have a good time. The first statement, frankly speaking, is to shirk.

5. Establish time frame If you're really in a hurry to spend time at work or at home, it's helpful to tell your friends how long they'll last. For example, if you know that your product will be released within a month and you will have plenty of time after that, then express your desire to reconnect with your friends later. Even if the new product fails and the development time becomes two months, your friends will still appreciate your desire to reunite with them as soon as possible.

6. Decide whether to have a more in-depth dialogue It's time to face the dark side of "busy". Everyone knows that "I'm busy" can be a way to end an unwanted relationship. Children call it "ghost shadow" - disappear like a ghost without explanation. If you are using the word "busy" in this way, you should decide whether to have a deeper conversation with the person you are talking to. Because the deterioration of relations with friends is unpleasant, some friendships are worth fighting for. In some cases, "busy" breaks up a friendship, which will cause great harm to both sides. this is it! Try not to say "busy" and see what happens!