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My brothers are entry-level misogynists. I say this because the thoughts brewing in their heads are borrowed from social media and friends. They complain about imaginary girlfriends taking their imaginary money. At first, I was triggered and would argue until I was fuming.
One of their arguments was that women don’t have sufficient knowledge in their fields. I brought up women presidents, business leaders and sports women. Another argument was that women are “too emotional” (the typical argument). My logical retorts fell on deaf, obstinate ears. I was getting worried. How was I going to convince them that misogyny was more evil than the feminism their social media role models told them to hate?
A few days later, my brother asked me how something technical worked. I was about to answer then I paused, smiled and replied, “Well I’m a woman and I wouldn’t know anything about that”. It felt so good. He laughed. I laughed. Then I replied him.
Not too long after that day, my other brother needed money for something so he asked me. I smiled and replied, “I’m a woman. I can’t have that amount of money. Surely, as a man, you should be the one giving me money”. He smiled. I smiled and gave him the money he needed.
What happened thereafter was that they argued with less vigour. They began to see the folly in their bias against women.
Amidst all of this, I saw with glass-like clarity the evil that is misogyny. My mum has been present in my brothers’ lives since they were born. They saw her juggle office work, marriage, home management and us (the children) effectively until she resigned in 2015. Since 2015, her former workplace has not been able to find someone as capable as her.
She has sacrificed, denied herself of pleasures, gone against herself just so her husband and children will be happy always. She has kept late nights praying, defended us, and passed through life-threatening ordeals just so we can keep going forward in life. Only for her sons to develop a stupid bias against women that they are less than men and therefore deserve less than men.
When I try to defend feminism in front of misogynists, the usual attack is that feminists are wicked and hate men. Well, I’m here to tell you that that is misandry. Feminism advocates for the removal of legal and societal restrictions on women in order to bring about the equality of the sexes in all aspects of life, public and private.
Why is it so difficult to see women as human beings deserving of basic acts of humaneness? Why do you feel so threatened and triggered by the happiness and success of women? Where does all this hatred come from?
The things that make most women happy are not even life-threatening acts like wrestling. It’s beauty, literature, fashion, art, chocolate, etc. The fine things of life.
I asked a guy once to join me on an ice cream date and he snickered saying that licking ice cream is for girls. A 21-year-old man. I was baffled at his vast ignorance and self-inflicted pain. Misogynistic men love pain that much huh?
I feel sorry (and don’t) for misogynistic men. They will forever remain in the depths of bitterness and anguish all because they don’t want women to be happy. There is nothing good in misogyny.
Ifeoluwa Favour
