I am here... I am there... I am everywhere... I am the man of your dreams... I am the voice inside your head... I am the man your mother warned you about... I am the nihilist... I am poetry in motion... I am the anti-conformist... I am Satan... I am an Information Systems and Technology major... I am a Psychology major... I am loud... I am quiet... I am dope... I am stupid... I am phat... I am phunny.... I am (obviously) a Phish head... I am high on life... I am high on _____... I am high on a mountain looking down on a world veiled in hatred... I am a writer... I am a poet... I knew it... I am a white, heterosexual male living in an oppressed environment... I am the man behind the mask... I never have to ask... I am my own dog... I am a "real" American... I am in your mind's eye... I am a figment of your imagination... I am a fool in love... I am good... I am evil... I am chaotic neutral... I am the ruler of my own little microcosm... I strike fear into the hearts of men... I love you... I hate you... I am educational... I am detrimental... I am the duality of man... I am destructive... I am a believer... I am a dreamer... I am dyed... I am tattooed... I am pierced... I am J.... and you're not.