jer979Purpose Struggle
Yesterday, I decided that my blogging career should come to an end. I was doing myself a disservice. I told myself that the goal of the posts was to dig deeper, peel back the layers, get down to the core. But by publishing online (or on-chain as the case may be), I was subconsciously writing for others, even if I told myself that I didn't care if others read. So, in an effort to be more authentic, I figured I'd stop publishing and start doing a private journal. Within 2 hours of that decision...
jer979Value. Happiness.
I feel happy. It's fun, it's light, like a feather floating at the beginning of Forrest Gump. But, like the feather, it's not grounded. It can flitter and float away. Value is also ephemeral. We know it when we see it. We feel it, somewhere deep inside. Something connects to us, saying "yes, this is worth it." The "it" that it's worth is energy. Energy in the form of time, attention, money. The things of which our possession is limited. There's a reason why all the great traditions point to "...
jer979Coffee with AI
Every day for the past month, I’ve had a coffee date with AI. I literally sit down, with a cup of coffee, with an appointment on my calendar that says “coffee with AI”. During that time, AI (I’ve used ChatGPT, Gemini, Perplexity, Claude, and Venice) and I literally have a chat, the way I would with a friend. It’s not “write this letter for me” or “do this or that.” No, it’s a chance for us to have a conversation about whatever topic I want. Many days, recently, at least, it’s been about quant...
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jer979Purpose Struggle
Yesterday, I decided that my blogging career should come to an end. I was doing myself a disservice. I told myself that the goal of the posts was to dig deeper, peel back the layers, get down to the core. But by publishing online (or on-chain as the case may be), I was subconsciously writing for others, even if I told myself that I didn't care if others read. So, in an effort to be more authentic, I figured I'd stop publishing and start doing a private journal. Within 2 hours of that decision...
jer979Value. Happiness.
I feel happy. It's fun, it's light, like a feather floating at the beginning of Forrest Gump. But, like the feather, it's not grounded. It can flitter and float away. Value is also ephemeral. We know it when we see it. We feel it, somewhere deep inside. Something connects to us, saying "yes, this is worth it." The "it" that it's worth is energy. Energy in the form of time, attention, money. The things of which our possession is limited. There's a reason why all the great traditions point to "...
jer979Coffee with AI
Every day for the past month, I’ve had a coffee date with AI. I literally sit down, with a cup of coffee, with an appointment on my calendar that says “coffee with AI”. During that time, AI (I’ve used ChatGPT, Gemini, Perplexity, Claude, and Venice) and I literally have a chat, the way I would with a friend. It’s not “write this letter for me” or “do this or that.” No, it’s a chance for us to have a conversation about whatever topic I want. Many days, recently, at least, it’s been about quant...
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Like floating in a pool or the ocean, the sensation is all encompassing.
Touching every part of the body, it’s like a wetsuit of vibration, of energy.
Tingling, it feels like there is no exit. No reprieve.
The mind races for an explanation, for assurance that “it’s going to be ok,” but the body says, “not so fast.”
Not that it won’t be ok. No one knows.
But the choice is to run or to surrender.
Running creates a chase. It’s going to catch up and the sensation is going to reemerge, perhaps stronger.
Surrendering is terrifying, as if it also means that the fear will win and what is possible becomes certain.
But the surrender might mean something else.
It might mean being alive and it might create a greater strength and resilience for whatever comes next.
Like floating in a pool or the ocean, the sensation is all encompassing.
Touching every part of the body, it’s like a wetsuit of vibration, of energy.
Tingling, it feels like there is no exit. No reprieve.
The mind races for an explanation, for assurance that “it’s going to be ok,” but the body says, “not so fast.”
Not that it won’t be ok. No one knows.
But the choice is to run or to surrender.
Running creates a chase. It’s going to catch up and the sensation is going to reemerge, perhaps stronger.
Surrendering is terrifying, as if it also means that the fear will win and what is possible becomes certain.
But the surrender might mean something else.
It might mean being alive and it might create a greater strength and resilience for whatever comes next.
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