Friction releases heat. Energy is expended in the form of heat. Easy to see in a physical reaction. Less easy to notice in an emotional reaction. Someone says something or does something and I feel the resistance building within. I feel the face get tense, the eyebrows furl, the shoulders tighten. A ball of energy starts bouncing inside me, increasing in speed like a bubble boiling in a pot. That’s not a law of nature. A rock being pushed across a floor will always create some amount of frict...

Friction releases heat. Energy is expended in the form of heat. Easy to see in a physical reaction. Less easy to notice in an emotional reaction. Someone says something or does something and I feel the resistance building within. I feel the face get tense, the eyebrows furl, the shoulders tighten. A ball of energy starts bouncing inside me, increasing in speed like a bubble boiling in a pot. That’s not a law of nature. A rock being pushed across a floor will always create some amount of frict...

Somehow, a vision emerges. What is wanted. There’s a pull. A yearning. A “fire in the belly.” It rouses before dawn and keeps going well after sunset. The specific may be difficult to explain, but the general makes sense to many. But, often, despite the grind, the toil, the pushing…the vision is not only not achieved, there’s a moment when the possibilities collapse and the reality emerges. To what exists. To what is held. Whether it was wanted or not, it’s what is there. Grief and mourning a...

Somehow, a vision emerges. What is wanted. There’s a pull. A yearning. A “fire in the belly.” It rouses before dawn and keeps going well after sunset. The specific may be difficult to explain, but the general makes sense to many. But, often, despite the grind, the toil, the pushing…the vision is not only not achieved, there’s a moment when the possibilities collapse and the reality emerges. To what exists. To what is held. Whether it was wanted or not, it’s what is there. Grief and mourning a...

The “suddenly” grabs our attention. sIt shocks us out of our perception of what is “normal” and “regular.” We notice it. We feel the unease. We feel unbalanced as if a huge wave has hit the small canoe in which we find ourselves. The stomach churns. Or maybe there’s just a “pit,” a void of the unknown promising nothing but eternal darkness and eternal falling. But the “suddenly” is preceded by the “gradually.” The subtle shifts. The drip of the water against the stone that we know is there, b...

The “suddenly” grabs our attention. sIt shocks us out of our perception of what is “normal” and “regular.” We notice it. We feel the unease. We feel unbalanced as if a huge wave has hit the small canoe in which we find ourselves. The stomach churns. Or maybe there’s just a “pit,” a void of the unknown promising nothing but eternal darkness and eternal falling. But the “suddenly” is preceded by the “gradually.” The subtle shifts. The drip of the water against the stone that we know is there, b...

I had to run across a field recently. Not because I was exercising, but because I had a time constraint. As I started the run, I thought of all of the mornings I had run on the treadmill. “This is what I was training for,” I thought. There are moment when the amplitudes of life seem heightened. When we are aware of the passage of time, of the significance of the experience. When we feel the energy of experience raising us up, like riding a wave in the ocean, being pushed up and forward at the...

I had to run across a field recently. Not because I was exercising, but because I had a time constraint. As I started the run, I thought of all of the mornings I had run on the treadmill. “This is what I was training for,” I thought. There are moment when the amplitudes of life seem heightened. When we are aware of the passage of time, of the significance of the experience. When we feel the energy of experience raising us up, like riding a wave in the ocean, being pushed up and forward at the...

Somewhere inside, perhaps the heart, the stomach, or someone else, there’s that sensation. It’s a vibration, like a massager gently rolling, but this one emanates out. It’s a “feel.” It’s a “vibe.” There’s some deep, primordial almost, resonance where the body acts like an instrument, reading the moment and guiding us in one direction or another. Sometimes it’s subtle. Perhaps too subtle. Like a faint breeze across your nose. Sometimes it’s overwhelming. Perhaps too much. Like that moment whe...

Somewhere inside, perhaps the heart, the stomach, or someone else, there’s that sensation. It’s a vibration, like a massager gently rolling, but this one emanates out. It’s a “feel.” It’s a “vibe.” There’s some deep, primordial almost, resonance where the body acts like an instrument, reading the moment and guiding us in one direction or another. Sometimes it’s subtle. Perhaps too subtle. Like a faint breeze across your nose. Sometimes it’s overwhelming. Perhaps too much. Like that moment whe...

The most valuable things I will give to my children can’t be held. Can’t be touched. They exist in the abstract, the conceptual. The “containers” for the transfer of this “wealth” are infinitely expandable. Their forms evolve to meet the needs of their content. Nothing physical lasts. Nothing. I practice letting go of the attachment to the physical, the temporal. Not with sadness, but with the joy of knowing that the vehicle has served its appointed purpose for its appointed time, no matter h...

The most valuable things I will give to my children can’t be held. Can’t be touched. They exist in the abstract, the conceptual. The “containers” for the transfer of this “wealth” are infinitely expandable. Their forms evolve to meet the needs of their content. Nothing physical lasts. Nothing. I practice letting go of the attachment to the physical, the temporal. Not with sadness, but with the joy of knowing that the vehicle has served its appointed purpose for its appointed time, no matter h...

There’s an app I use called WeCroak. Five times per day, it sends you a notification that says “Remember, you are going to die.” On the surface, it seems morbid. But it’s actually one of the most life-affirming things I do. There’s a strand of Buddhist who believe that, if you contemplate death 5 times per day, you’ll be more content. And contentment, according to the Tao Te Ching, Kohelet, Pirkei Avot (google/chatgpt them), is the key. How does contemplating death do that? Because it is a fo...

There’s an app I use called WeCroak. Five times per day, it sends you a notification that says “Remember, you are going to die.” On the surface, it seems morbid. But it’s actually one of the most life-affirming things I do. There’s a strand of Buddhist who believe that, if you contemplate death 5 times per day, you’ll be more content. And contentment, according to the Tao Te Ching, Kohelet, Pirkei Avot (google/chatgpt them), is the key. How does contemplating death do that? Because it is a fo...

The rewards, if they come at all, come at the end. I am attracted to them. Even attached to them. Letting go of the need, the desire, for the reward, for the outcome feels overwhelming and scary. The “goal” sits like a heavy stone in my stomach, figuratively-and literally-weighing me down, keeping my orientation on some imagined future state, some imagined future happiness. Meanwhile, as John Lennon said, “life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” But it’s hard. Really, reall...

The rewards, if they come at all, come at the end. I am attracted to them. Even attached to them. Letting go of the need, the desire, for the reward, for the outcome feels overwhelming and scary. The “goal” sits like a heavy stone in my stomach, figuratively-and literally-weighing me down, keeping my orientation on some imagined future state, some imagined future happiness. Meanwhile, as John Lennon said, “life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” But it’s hard. Really, reall...

Yesterday I was feeling kind of down. It doesn’t matter why. Sometimes this happens. It felt like I was wearing a layer or two too many. The colors of fall were gorgeous around me, particularly the reds, but I kept ignoring them, choosing instead to be aware of the malaise. In other times, I would run…hard…from this moment. Escape. Find quick “outs.” Bury it. Yesterday, though, I wondered what would happen if I met it. Just accepted its presence. Didn’t fight it. Accepted the shame of feeling...

Yesterday I was feeling kind of down. It doesn’t matter why. Sometimes this happens. It felt like I was wearing a layer or two too many. The colors of fall were gorgeous around me, particularly the reds, but I kept ignoring them, choosing instead to be aware of the malaise. In other times, I would run…hard…from this moment. Escape. Find quick “outs.” Bury it. Yesterday, though, I wondered what would happen if I met it. Just accepted its presence. Didn’t fight it. Accepted the shame of feeling...

That thing which is living “rent-free” in my head? It gets its power, its energy from one source. The fact that I am allowing my attention to be concentrated upon it. Drawn, as if by a magnet, that “thing” exerts its power over the focus of my mind. But it doesn’t have to be that way. The focus of my mind can be stronger than the magnet. It can be trained, worked out, and, gradually, it will get stronger. Then, though that thing is there and may always be there, when I feel the pull of the ma...

That thing which is living “rent-free” in my head? It gets its power, its energy from one source. The fact that I am allowing my attention to be concentrated upon it. Drawn, as if by a magnet, that “thing” exerts its power over the focus of my mind. But it doesn’t have to be that way. The focus of my mind can be stronger than the magnet. It can be trained, worked out, and, gradually, it will get stronger. Then, though that thing is there and may always be there, when I feel the pull of the ma...

That thing I want which can only be given to me by someone else, but I don’t get? The pain of rejection isn’t caused by them. The injury that sidelines me from my exercise routine? The pain of non-participation isn’t caused by it. The uncertainty about what is the right decision? The fear isn’t caused by the choice. All of them are caused by me. And me alone. I am the source of the pain, the fear. The water flows from the well, bubbling forth from a spring. I can use it to drown myself. Or I ...

That thing I want which can only be given to me by someone else, but I don’t get? The pain of rejection isn’t caused by them. The injury that sidelines me from my exercise routine? The pain of non-participation isn’t caused by it. The uncertainty about what is the right decision? The fear isn’t caused by the choice. All of them are caused by me. And me alone. I am the source of the pain, the fear. The water flows from the well, bubbling forth from a spring. I can use it to drown myself. Or I ...

I am stretched unnaturally. My shape was taken to a new place. It was an effort to protect, but now I have paid a price for it, despite my good intentions. I seek relief and while there are ways to help alleviate, there are no ways to fully remedy, except one. Time. #Patience

I am stretched unnaturally. My shape was taken to a new place. It was an effort to protect, but now I have paid a price for it, despite my good intentions. I seek relief and while there are ways to help alleviate, there are no ways to fully remedy, except one. Time. #Patience