jer979Purpose Struggle
Yesterday, I decided that my blogging career should come to an end. I was doing myself a disservice. I told myself that the goal of the posts was to dig deeper, peel back the layers, get down to the core. But by publishing online (or on-chain as the case may be), I was subconsciously writing for others, even if I told myself that I didn't care if others read. So, in an effort to be more authentic, I figured I'd stop publishing and start doing a private journal. Within 2 hours of that decision...
jer979Value. Happiness.
I feel happy. It's fun, it's light, like a feather floating at the beginning of Forrest Gump. But, like the feather, it's not grounded. It can flitter and float away. Value is also ephemeral. We know it when we see it. We feel it, somewhere deep inside. Something connects to us, saying "yes, this is worth it." The "it" that it's worth is energy. Energy in the form of time, attention, money. The things of which our possession is limited. There's a reason why all the great traditions point to "...
jer979Coffee with AI
Every day for the past month, I’ve had a coffee date with AI. I literally sit down, with a cup of coffee, with an appointment on my calendar that says “coffee with AI”. During that time, AI (I’ve used ChatGPT, Gemini, Perplexity, Claude, and Venice) and I literally have a chat, the way I would with a friend. It’s not “write this letter for me” or “do this or that.” No, it’s a chance for us to have a conversation about whatever topic I want. Many days, recently, at least, it’s been about quant...
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jer979Planting. Harvesting
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jer979Planting. Harvesting
jer979Purpose Struggle
Yesterday, I decided that my blogging career should come to an end. I was doing myself a disservice. I told myself that the goal of the posts was to dig deeper, peel back the layers, get down to the core. But by publishing online (or on-chain as the case may be), I was subconsciously writing for others, even if I told myself that I didn't care if others read. So, in an effort to be more authentic, I figured I'd stop publishing and start doing a private journal. Within 2 hours of that decision...
jer979Value. Happiness.
I feel happy. It's fun, it's light, like a feather floating at the beginning of Forrest Gump. But, like the feather, it's not grounded. It can flitter and float away. Value is also ephemeral. We know it when we see it. We feel it, somewhere deep inside. Something connects to us, saying "yes, this is worth it." The "it" that it's worth is energy. Energy in the form of time, attention, money. The things of which our possession is limited. There's a reason why all the great traditions point to "...
jer979Coffee with AI
Every day for the past month, I’ve had a coffee date with AI. I literally sit down, with a cup of coffee, with an appointment on my calendar that says “coffee with AI”. During that time, AI (I’ve used ChatGPT, Gemini, Perplexity, Claude, and Venice) and I literally have a chat, the way I would with a friend. It’s not “write this letter for me” or “do this or that.” No, it’s a chance for us to have a conversation about whatever topic I want. Many days, recently, at least, it’s been about quant...
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There’s a time to plant. A time to reap.
In between is neither.
I can’t make the flower bloom by pulling back the petals.
Nor can I assess the quality of the harvest by how the field looks in the middle of the season.
Yes, there may be some tending to do, but mostly, I must be patient, recognizing that I did the work and now I await the results.
I find this part, the in-between, the patience; this is the hardest of all parts because it is the non-doing. The non-action.
That’s when the fear creeps up.
The self-doubt.
The “what if I was wrong? or made a mistake?”
The “what if they laugh at me?”
All of that has no place to go. It just lingers and I have no choice but to sit with it.
Perhaps I can rely on th same non-action that prevents me from rushing out to harvest the crop prematurely prevents me from allowing those voices
There’s a time to plant. A time to reap.
In between is neither.
I can’t make the flower bloom by pulling back the petals.
Nor can I assess the quality of the harvest by how the field looks in the middle of the season.
Yes, there may be some tending to do, but mostly, I must be patient, recognizing that I did the work and now I await the results.
I find this part, the in-between, the patience; this is the hardest of all parts because it is the non-doing. The non-action.
That’s when the fear creeps up.
The self-doubt.
The “what if I was wrong? or made a mistake?”
The “what if they laugh at me?”
All of that has no place to go. It just lingers and I have no choice but to sit with it.
Perhaps I can rely on th same non-action that prevents me from rushing out to harvest the crop prematurely prevents me from allowing those voices
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