Obsessed with DeFi, Blockchain, and Bitcoin. Bikes, Computers, Books, Cats, Cars, Playstation, Snowboarding
Obsessed with DeFi, Blockchain, and Bitcoin. Bikes, Computers, Books, Cats, Cars, Playstation, Snowboarding
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Tick Tock
Flicka ‘da Clock
Time…
so finite
so scarce
so valuable
and yet we always think we have time…
time to accomplish all the things we’ve wanted to accomplish…
time to ask that girl out..
“oh, next time I see her, I’ll do it.”
Next time…
what if there is no ‘next time’?
I oftentimes wonder if I would have enjoyed or cherished the time with my brother before things changed… before drugs changed him forever… before the drugs robbed him from my Life… before the drugs robbed his Life from him…
There are a lot of things in Life that I wish I could go back and change.
What if an action I could have taken could have altered our Lives for the better?
What would that look like?
Could I have saved him?
Could I have changed anything?
Probably.
And that Kills me.
But no matter how much regret or self-torment I endure;
Time doesn’t change.
There ain’t no going back.
Time keeps on slipping into the future
and I don’t know if it’s a future I want to be a part of.
If only Time was reversible… if only God gave us an opportunity to Not fuck up…
Acceptance is the only way forward though.
Accept that what happened, happened.
Maybe in an alternate universe things were different…
Maybe you saved the person you wanted to save…
Maybe you became the one that needed to be saved…
That’s really what we’re after here, aren’t we?
You want to go back and change things because you want to alleviate your current shame and/or guilt for lack of right action.
It’s haunting you on the daily.
Keeps you from sleeping at night.
Keeps you from enjoying life’s little pleasures because it’s always there in the back of your mind…
There’s no saving you.
Not in this Life.
But maybe the next.
As you would say to a friend after losing a bet,
“Better luck next time”
(I don’t want a next time. I don’t even want THIS time)
-Kelly
Tick Tock
Flicka ‘da Clock
Time…
so finite
so scarce
so valuable
and yet we always think we have time…
time to accomplish all the things we’ve wanted to accomplish…
time to ask that girl out..
“oh, next time I see her, I’ll do it.”
Next time…
what if there is no ‘next time’?
I oftentimes wonder if I would have enjoyed or cherished the time with my brother before things changed… before drugs changed him forever… before the drugs robbed him from my Life… before the drugs robbed his Life from him…
There are a lot of things in Life that I wish I could go back and change.
What if an action I could have taken could have altered our Lives for the better?
What would that look like?
Could I have saved him?
Could I have changed anything?
Probably.
And that Kills me.
But no matter how much regret or self-torment I endure;
Time doesn’t change.
There ain’t no going back.
Time keeps on slipping into the future
and I don’t know if it’s a future I want to be a part of.
If only Time was reversible… if only God gave us an opportunity to Not fuck up…
Acceptance is the only way forward though.
Accept that what happened, happened.
Maybe in an alternate universe things were different…
Maybe you saved the person you wanted to save…
Maybe you became the one that needed to be saved…
That’s really what we’re after here, aren’t we?
You want to go back and change things because you want to alleviate your current shame and/or guilt for lack of right action.
It’s haunting you on the daily.
Keeps you from sleeping at night.
Keeps you from enjoying life’s little pleasures because it’s always there in the back of your mind…
There’s no saving you.
Not in this Life.
But maybe the next.
As you would say to a friend after losing a bet,
“Better luck next time”
(I don’t want a next time. I don’t even want THIS time)
-Kelly
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