I’ve already written about my unusual journey from leader to faculty member. Now, as I wrap up the first week of classes in my new role, I’m trying to get my head around why the “pure faculty” life feels so strange.

For every leadership position I held, in both government and academia, my office never felt like it was “mine.”

Management offices often contain more than just an individual workspace. The last two offices I occupied (in leadership positions) were fairly spacious, and each included a round table that seated 4–6 people for small meetings. So, as a leader, “my office” was a basically a small conference room, too. Sizable enough that others borrowed these spaces for meetings, or storage, when I wasn’t around.

I didn’t personalize those offices much. At the time, I convinced myself this was a “minimalist” tendency but I’m not a minimalist, and the truth is: it was discomfort. Lack of connection to the space (and maybe also, the job?).

My new faculty office is very different. It already feels “like me.” It has fresh yellow paint on the walls, blue carpet, and contains a hodgepodge of reclaimed furniture that I adore.

I actually despise modern office “system” furniture, so I was thrilled to claim a newly discarded but beautifully maintained mid-century metal desk for my new space. It has drawers! For things!

I love this new office and honestly haven’t felt this “at home” at work since I was a government researcher over 15 years ago (with a very similar metal desk!).

For the last three years as an overworked academic administrator, I insisted on teaching something every semester — even if it was just a 1 hour seminar course. Because honestly, I needed it to feel productive, and to take the edge off the administrative tasks that came barrelling at me non-stop. Teaching was the “good stuff” I looked forward to, and it carried me through some crazy times during the pandemic.

During this first week of classes at my university, around lunchtime on Wednesday, I looked up and realized that almost everything I’d done so far this week was “the good stuff.” Prepping for class, teaching, coordinating with my TA, talking with students about research.

I had to pinch myself to realize: this is my entire job now. I still can’t quite believe it.

As Head of the largest School/Department on campus for the last three years, my days were almost always overrun with “noise.” Bureaucratic hurdles to jump, forms to sign, approvals to give, faculty issues to solve, student complaints to manage, curriculum questions to field, endless meetings to attend, course scheduling nightmares to fend off, facility and equipment malfunctions to triage, etc, etc, etc…

This week I got a glimpse of a very different life.

I am teaching two classes to a total of 140 students. One is an upper level undergrad class of 35; the other is a sophomore level lecture with 105 students. I have a grad student TA who is running recitations for that lecture. And I am working on two research projects with a total of 5 students.

That’s a fairly hectic academic symphony to orchestrate and I will stay busy, for sure. But it’s a very different kind of hustle and bustle.

The biggest difference I found in this first week: stretches of hours (more than one!) of actual silence in which to think, prepare for class, read, even conjure a few original thoughts.

A lot more signal and way less noise is the biggest gift of all in this role change.

If you’re the chair of a large department at a large university, I tip my hat in respect for the chaos you field on any given day.

There must be a better way to manage academic departments. Okay, I know there is a better way…but it requires a willingness to do things differently, and unfortunately, I haven’t found that to be in abundance in academia.

For me, after Week 1 of classes, I feel grateful, a bit giddy, slightly guilty, and more than a little worried about the well-being of my School Head successor. Plus plenty more I haven’t processed yet.

But now, it’s time to get back to the good stuff — I have classes to prep and research to do.

Thanks for reading. If you liked what you read, consider hitting that 👏 and/or Follow button.

278

2

I’ve already written about my unusual journey from leader to faculty member. Now, as I wrap up the first week of classes in my new role, I’m trying to get my head around why the “pure faculty” life feels so strange.

For every leadership position I held, in both government and academia, my office never felt like it was “mine.”

Management offices often contain more than just an individual workspace. The last two offices I occupied (in leadership positions) were fairly spacious, and each included a round table that seated 4–6 people for small meetings. So, as a leader, “my office” was a basically a small conference room, too. Sizable enough that others borrowed these spaces for meetings, or storage, when I wasn’t around.

I didn’t personalize those offices much. At the time, I convinced myself this was a “minimalist” tendency but I’m not a minimalist, and the truth is: it was discomfort. Lack of connection to the space (and maybe also, the job?).

My new faculty office is very different. It already feels “like me.” It has fresh yellow paint on the walls, blue carpet, and contains a hodgepodge of reclaimed furniture that I adore.

I actually despise modern office “system” furniture, so I was thrilled to claim a newly discarded but beautifully maintained mid-century metal desk for my new space. It has drawers! For things!

I love this new office and honestly haven’t felt this “at home” at work since I was a government researcher over 15 years ago (with a very similar metal desk!).

For the last three years as an overworked academic administrator, I insisted on teaching something every semester — even if it was just a 1 hour seminar course. Because honestly, I needed it to feel productive, and to take the edge off the administrative tasks that came barrelling at me non-stop. Teaching was the “good stuff” I looked forward to, and it carried me through some crazy times during the pandemic.

During this first week of classes at my university, around lunchtime on Wednesday, I looked up and realized that almost everything I’d done so far this week was “the good stuff.” Prepping for class, teaching, coordinating with my TA, talking with students about research.

I had to pinch myself to realize: this is my entire job now. I still can’t quite believe it.

As Head of the largest School/Department on campus for the last three years, my days were almost always overrun with “noise.” Bureaucratic hurdles to jump, forms to sign, approvals to give, faculty issues to solve, student complaints to manage, curriculum questions to field, endless meetings to attend, course scheduling nightmares to fend off, facility and equipment malfunctions to triage, etc, etc, etc…

This week I got a glimpse of a very different life.

I am teaching two classes to a total of 140 students. One is an upper level undergrad class of 35; the other is a sophomore level lecture with 105 students. I have a grad student TA who is running recitations for that lecture. And I am working on two research projects with a total of 5 students.

That’s a fairly hectic academic symphony to orchestrate and I will stay busy, for sure. But it’s a very different kind of hustle and bustle.

The biggest difference I found in this first week: stretches of hours (more than one!) of actual silence in which to think, prepare for class, read, even conjure a few original thoughts.

A lot more signal and way less noise is the biggest gift of all in this role change.

If you’re the chair of a large department at a large university, I tip my hat in respect for the chaos you field on any given day.

There must be a better way to manage academic departments. Okay, I know there is a better way…but it requires a willingness to do things differently, and unfortunately, I haven’t found that to be in abundance in academia.

For me, after Week 1 of classes, I feel grateful, a bit giddy, slightly guilty, and more than a little worried about the well-being of my School Head successor. Plus plenty more I haven’t processed yet.

But now, it’s time to get back to the good stuff — I have classes to prep and research to do.

Thanks for reading. If you liked what you read, consider hitting that 👏 and/or Follow button.

278

2