The end of a relationship is shit.
Particularly if your partner ends it.
While the immediate loss is horrible - what comes after is awful: the questioning of one's self worth - the introspection and doubt - I mean - if the one you love has stopped loving you back - what does that say about you?!
The thing is - it does kinda work both ways.
If you've truly loved someone and find yourself falling out of love - realizing that the relationship doesn't have a future - shit is coming your way too. You're about to inflict significant pain on a person you care deeply about - the last person in the world you would want to hurt - and yet here you are - about to cause some serious damage to their psyche.
That's where I found myself.
Three years into a relationship - all the way through college - families connected, friends intertwined, financial commitments to accommodations and immediate futures - and yet I knew it had to end. The future was coming and for better or worse - I did not see her in mine.
It was after graduation, I'm sitting in my parents' garden in Germany - on the patio - doors open - the second movement of Schubert’s String Quintet in C Major, D.956 on the stereo - and I'm staring into space - wrestling with all of it - holding all these emotions: angst, fear, love, despair, hope - just - all of it - and then - the music takes me…
Overwhelms me.
And I cry.
Like - ugly cry.
Just sobbing and allowing the tears to stream down my face unabated.
And still the music played - so I just sat there and lived with it: how I was going to make her feel - how it was going to make me feel - how our friends would feel and how our futures would change - and then the strangest thing happened - as the silence surrounded the end of the Allegretto - I felt - better.
Drained sure - physically and emotionally - but weirdly calmer - and prepared - and ready.
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Andrew McCluskey
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Adapted from the prompt: "Why does listening to sad music make you feel better?"
So beautifully written What really amazes me is how deep and universal this connection between people can be. That moment when you realize the person you once loved so much either doesn’t love you anymore or maybe you don’t love them the same way؛ it’s almost impossible to digest how the world feels after that. For me, the only thing that ever managed to soothe me was music. It’s like music takes all the chaos in my head and turns it into some kind of dance and for a few minutes I can breathe again Calm again Even if it’s just for that short while.
❤️
Navigating the end of a relationship can leave scars on self-worth and seed doubt. In a heartfelt post, @music2work2 reflects on a poignant moment punctuated by Schubert's music while wrestling with heavy emotions after ending a three-year relationship. Ugliness turned into tears that ultimately led to a sense of calm and readiness to face the future. Discover how embracing melancholic tunes might be the pathway to feeling better during life's emotional storms.