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I am on an airplane.
Situated in the sky.
Sitting at a window seat where my gaze looks out.
Out the window.
I see the world amongst the clouds.
Miles look like millimeters.
Mountains like hills.
People like penciled-in dotted specs.
It is here that the world which, on the ground felt all-consuming, seems instead like a portrait of serenity.
Moments, time and the pieces that make it up are simplified.
Questioning stands still.
Worries are dwindled.
Dreams stand no question of attainability.
Lately, I have been pondering the concept of time.
Not necessarily in its frame of measurement by hours, seconds or minutes.
But as it relates to moments.
Plans.
Thoughts.
Desires.
It seems that, if I relinquish my awareness, time passes by quicker than the blink of an eye.
Days become seconds.
Moments like minutes.
Years pass and their memories live in the mind like a fast-forwarded film on the television screen.
The highlights, highlighted.
The hard times, referenced.
The peaks and valleys of the day-to-day, reviewed.
Though, through this perspective, can seem unimportant, insignificant or mundane.
Isn't it interesting?
The severity and weight of things that seemed astronomically big or microscopically small,
How these things are viewed when we zoom out the lens.
How we view our days when we achieve that perspective of separation that does only come with time.
Something that felt so big perhaps now looks small.
The small, seemingly unimportant, pieces whose significance now magnifies as the zoom retracts.
Perhaps there was that step.
That decision.
That choice.
That desire.
That felt like a whole life's weight on our shoulders as its onset approached
Though, through time, is understood to be an insignificant curve on our life's drawn-out map.
It is interesting to me,
The shift in understanding and perspective that comes through time.
Through lived moments.
Through continued life and breath.
I have lately felt inundated with the understanding that time, moments, life
They are all at the liberty of passing by.
Starting and ending.
Quicker than we may hope or desire.
Some days feel like a lifetime.
Yet how is it that a lifetime can sometimes feel like a matter of days?
How is it that, when we look back, it can all boil down to those highlighted scenes in our fast-forwarded film?
If that is the case, how do I optimize for the best use of my time?
How do I ensure that I am not wasteful of the time that I am given?
What does wasteful even mean?
How do I find the moments of significance?
How do I ease my worries and anxieties so that the volume of the trails does not dominate the film?
How do I utilize this perspective?
To scale back the weight of the worries that come with those times of decision-making and next-step navigation?
How can I allow this perspective to assist me in optimizing the time that I do have?
Through this perspective, I have learned that the 'big things' of each moment will likely not feel so big as time goes on.
But does this negate the validity of those big feelings in the present?
No.
Those feelings are valid.
Real.
In some ways, I believe they are meant to be experienced and felt.
Can I also take the understanding of this perspective and use it as a tool to assist me as I navigate life?
To ease some of those worries?
To lessen some of the pain?
I believe so.
Perhaps if I held onto this reminder, the big would not feel so dauntingly big.
Perhaps, through my anxieties, it would be easier to remember to breathe.
Perhaps there is a story in the zoom-out.
With each tick of the frame
Widening of the angle
With each passing moment in time.
Is it possible that it is here, in the moments after the zoom-out,
Where true meaning and understanding arrive?
It is easiest for me to grasp these concepts when I am on that airplane.
When I am situated in the sky.
When I can see the world amongst the clouds.
When moments, time and the pieces that make it up are simplified.
When questioning stands still.
Worries are dwindled.
And dreams stand no question of attainability.
What if I allowed these moments to make up my film?
This perspective to guide my understanding?
These thoughts to drive the evolution of my map?
What moments would then be in store?
If time was the propeller and this perspective restored.
Melanie Jane
