Tiruchi mama left for his heavenly abode this week. It is surreal to think that such a lively person who always graced us with his magnanimous presence at every occasion shall not be seen in the flesh on the next one. Life is so short and nothing can be taken for granted.

“What he giveth, he taketh with no real notice, as it is all his and he knows better than any of us can ever know. We are but a speck of dust in his lotus feet and this we are reminded of from time to time.“

My personal encounters with Tiruchi “Ramanathan” mama were few but each one is memorable irrespective of how long it has been since. The first time was at my wedding where I first noticed a man singing so eloquently in our “Nalungu” (நலங்கு) function. That was one of the more enjoyable and lower stress moments, a light hearted gameplay between newlyweds. In the pressure cooker times of a South Indian wedding, this is one that provides levity during the mid day. Mama was super creative where he even infused the occasion and the story of me meeting with my wife in his own terms. I am always fond of singers, I admire men who sing classical tones, and mama’s voice boomed over the boisterous crowds. It was so memorable.

The more recent occasion was when we visited him in his residence near Srirangam in 2019. It was an unplanned chance drop in to their place as we unexpectedly had time to kill in the afternoon when it was blazing hot and we had pretty much no where to go after the temples closed down for the afternoon. School was in session in Trichy, so most of the kid friendly activities were closed. It was at this time that we thought about visiting mama when we had a chance and I am grateful for that opportunity as it would turn out to be the last time I had the pleasure of meeting him face to face.

Mama was his usual cheerful self, I spent more time with him that I ever had before. As with some of these meeting with elderly folks, there is always a good mix of enquiry, reflection and humor. It was one such meeting. He was seeing us after the wedding, now married for almost 2 decades, with 2 kids and 2x the body weight! So, there was quite some catching up. He and mami had aged, their kids working in the Gulf. There is as always a bit of a talent show, where parents, including my wife, love to exhibit kids’ talent, in this case my elder son, who is an accomplished Carnatic singer of his own right. He thrilled mama with a great singing performance that he loved. He even joined in to hum to some of the tunes like “Karpagavallinil”. We shared a few laughs, a meal and it was time to leave for the train station to catch our train back to Chennai. He came out and wished us well, sent us off from his driveway in Rayarthoppu.

Little did we imagine that would be the last time we said goodbye or visit that full hearted person in his home. Mama will be missed, not because we spoke to him every day, but because whenever we did, his magnanimity, his being full of life, his constant presence as an avuncular figure and his love for music, will all be sorely missed.

In this materialistic world where everyone is chasing something or the other, Mama took some time to enjoy relationships, to share a joyous moment, share his home and comforts with those that needed it and was always cheerful and never shied away from doing what it takes. He was a constant force of support to my in-laws at the time when he was most needed. Through the end, he kept up his ideals and stood behind the family.

Tiruchi mama left for his heavenly abode this week. It is surreal to think that such a lively person who always graced us with his magnanimous presence at every occasion shall not be seen in the flesh on the next one. Life is so short and nothing can be taken for granted.

“What he giveth, he taketh with no real notice, as it is all his and he knows better than any of us can ever know. We are but a speck of dust in his lotus feet and this we are reminded of from time to time.“

My personal encounters with Tiruchi “Ramanathan” mama were few but each one is memorable irrespective of how long it has been since. The first time was at my wedding where I first noticed a man singing so eloquently in our “Nalungu” (நலங்கு) function. That was one of the more enjoyable and lower stress moments, a light hearted gameplay between newlyweds. In the pressure cooker times of a South Indian wedding, this is one that provides levity during the mid day. Mama was super creative where he even infused the occasion and the story of me meeting with my wife in his own terms. I am always fond of singers, I admire men who sing classical tones, and mama’s voice boomed over the boisterous crowds. It was so memorable.

The more recent occasion was when we visited him in his residence near Srirangam in 2019. It was an unplanned chance drop in to their place as we unexpectedly had time to kill in the afternoon when it was blazing hot and we had pretty much no where to go after the temples closed down for the afternoon. School was in session in Trichy, so most of the kid friendly activities were closed. It was at this time that we thought about visiting mama when we had a chance and I am grateful for that opportunity as it would turn out to be the last time I had the pleasure of meeting him face to face.

Mama was his usual cheerful self, I spent more time with him that I ever had before. As with some of these meeting with elderly folks, there is always a good mix of enquiry, reflection and humor. It was one such meeting. He was seeing us after the wedding, now married for almost 2 decades, with 2 kids and 2x the body weight! So, there was quite some catching up. He and mami had aged, their kids working in the Gulf. There is as always a bit of a talent show, where parents, including my wife, love to exhibit kids’ talent, in this case my elder son, who is an accomplished Carnatic singer of his own right. He thrilled mama with a great singing performance that he loved. He even joined in to hum to some of the tunes like “Karpagavallinil”. We shared a few laughs, a meal and it was time to leave for the train station to catch our train back to Chennai. He came out and wished us well, sent us off from his driveway in Rayarthoppu.

Little did we imagine that would be the last time we said goodbye or visit that full hearted person in his home. Mama will be missed, not because we spoke to him every day, but because whenever we did, his magnanimity, his being full of life, his constant presence as an avuncular figure and his love for music, will all be sorely missed.

In this materialistic world where everyone is chasing something or the other, Mama took some time to enjoy relationships, to share a joyous moment, share his home and comforts with those that needed it and was always cheerful and never shied away from doing what it takes. He was a constant force of support to my in-laws at the time when he was most needed. Through the end, he kept up his ideals and stood behind the family.