Hey you ❤️

So, two days this week, I really didn’t feel like working.

And I was like: “Hmm, how do we solve this?” 🤔

And my brain was like: "IFS!!!"

IFS (Internal Family Systems) is — short version — a therapy form that recognizes we all have different personalities and different voices inside our heads. Often, we have younger parts of us that are controlling us, usually because they’re traumatized or because they once learned to manage the world in a certain way.

Now, I recommend listening to any interview with the founder Richard Schwartz (or read his book No Bad Parts ) if you wanna learn more.

But for now, let´s get straight to how I used it not to procrastinate this week.

Here’s the step-by-step guide:

Step 1. Recognize that you are not this voice that doesn’t want to work - you have a part of you that doesn’t want to work, and your job is to get to know this part so that it feels seen and safe.

Step 2. Breathe in, breathe out , and then ask this part: “Hey, I noticed that you really don’t want to work right now. What are you scared will happen if you start working?”

Step 3. Just listen to what it says.

Step 4. Negotiate and talk with them as if it’s a child (because this part usually is).

And what happened?

I worked for 5 straight hours after that, simply because it felt safe and seen - and taken care of.

Try it.

This stuff works. ✨

✨ Life Update:

Wow, I’m realizing how hard it is to give a life update, considering how much is happening at all times. But in short:

My body: Due to autumn break in Oslo, there haven’t been any dance classes this week. That’s kind of great because I’ve got hamstring tendinitis (due to overuse ofc ), so I’ve only been doing calisthenics this week. I think my body (or more specifically my hamstring) is happy about that.

Emotional life. Goooshhhh, is it alive. Memories. Nightmares. Old feelings. They’re just a part of my everyday now (due to therapy), but this week (because I’ve let it all just come) I feel more at peace. And that’s so beautiful 🌱.

But the one thing that I’m entirely grateful for is my friends. I’ve been prioritizing meeting them this week—for walks, tea visits, more walks, and workouts—and I feel so heard and seen, and it’s so, so, SOOO good for my heart ❤️. So yeah, go get yourself some real good friends if you haven´t already - it´s priceless.

Business. OKKK—I feel so, so, so aligned. It’s so funny—because every time someone gives me advice (and oh my god, people just love telling others what to do, don’t they? ), I finally know when to listen and when not to.

If it doesn’t feel like peace in my body—I don’t do it.

Now, one unexpected gift from all the people telling me what I should do is this: I´ve become less co-dependent.

Why? I’ve realized how crappy it feels to be on the receiving end of constant advice. I used to be that girl, telling people all my cool life advice (can’t you tell by the fact that I’m literally writing you a newsletter about it?)—but now I only want to give it to people who actually want it (like you here on my email list 🌸).

Now—I hope you have a beautiful weekend, and you know I will because...

Taylor Swift’s album came out TODAY!!!!!!!!!!! And this email is obviously pre-scheduled because who has time to write (or eat or drink or think or do anything other than listen to the album when it comes out? Not me—that’s for sure)✨.

/Sara ❤️