See the original post by the box above.
So, I am working with the PenX development team in testing features, finding errors, and moderating the Farcaster channel. Since the project is early in development, the Channel isn’t super active right now. If you use PenX, please join the channel or join the Discord server.
Tomorrow, on Sunday, January 12, 2025, will mark the first meeting of the January Workshop, Moonshadow, at 4pm EDT. The group for this workshop is small by intention. With a total of six people, across 4 different time zones. It’s the first workshop I’ve ran in a couple of years, so finding my groove, and keeping the group productive are the main goals. We’ll be going over worldbuilding material for my next story setting, Moonshadow, as well as to offer the participants a bit of an introduction to the concept and practice of worldbuilding in general. I’m pretty stressed out at the moment, but I am extremely excited to see what we can accomplish with this group. If you’re a member of this workshop, LFG!!!!
Perhaps the most frustrating of all is the fact that there is absolutely nothing I can do with my computer or phone that is productive, and not a complete 10-year war. Absolutely nothing works in the way that it should(i.e. the way it says very clearly). So, any time I even touch my desktop, or try to do productive things with my iPhone or iPad, what should be a 5min, in and out check, turns into 4 hours of me shouting “WHY WON’T YOU JUST FUCKING WORK!” And I am just so over it. Any task. ANY task at all is a battle. 99% of the time, I have no clue why this is the case, because I am literally doing things exactly as they are supposed to be done(according to apps, their guides, and often their support teams). It just doesn’t seem to matter. All that matters is that I can’t ever accomplish anything unless I can commit a full day to just get a single microblog post to work. It’s ridiculous, and I know when you are reading this, your first thoughts will be “oh, he’s exaggerating” or “He just doesn’t know what he’s doing.” Yet, this is absolutely not the case. Not ever. A great majority of these frustrating and ludacris events are things that I have literally been doing for decades.
As I hope you can image, my mental status is not great. The problems I mention above are constant. Absolutely any time I try to get something accomplished, I either get so upset that I just give up, or spend most of the day to accomplish 15min tasks. THis drives my depression to be much more constant. Anxiety, often in the form of aggravation, is truly constant. I have no income at all. I used to make a very small amount through a variety of freelance tasks and projects, but that has become $0 because I can’t actually get anything done at all. Even this exceptionally basic WordPress entry has been so frustrating that I’m about to get in bed and take Benadryl until I have no choice but to sleep. I have several ways to offer my writing and art in a way to make money. I’m starting up workshops, which I haven’t done in around 2 years, but trying to get the material together is a complete fiasco. A great many things that I usually do for profit require a small initial fee, which I can no longer pay.
If you’d like to help out, I’d really appreciate it. Crypto users can send ETH or USDC, preferably on the Base chain to jlhasa.eth. My PayPal is @jacklhasa. I could SERIOUSLY use any pennies you could spare. I am not okay. Nothing is okay. I’ve only rarely been so despondent, at any point in my life PLEASE help if you can. I can also be reached via the images below.
Jack Lhasa