i’ve been wearing glasses since surgery last september, and every time i take them off when i'm using my laptop or anytime really, it makes me realise how much difficult I made life for myself for nearly two years (left eye's cornea was progressively deforming) because i did not have it in me to get help and face the reality that i'll need surgery again. all the art I created in 2022-2023 was despite me only having one semi-functional cornea. today, when I think about what I went through on a daily basis, i can’t help but grieve for my past self. at the same time i'm also relieved that this time last year i finally told my parents i can't see well at all and i may need surgery to stop left eye's cornea from getting worse. I have a friend to thank for getting me to that mind set where I finally asked for help, and i'm grateful for him every single day. send him some good juju if you're still reading this.
gmgn. eye is a bit swollen and highly sensitive to light (mf hurts like hell) but other than that..the doc says everything looks ok. few more days of extreme care until the inflammation reduces + the corneal tissue and epithelium fully heals. 
left eye’s procedure is finally scheduled for tomo afternoon. no screen time for a bit. see y’all in a few days. 
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the number of times I had to tell (and remind) my family ‘i can’t see clearly’ or ‘can you read that out loud? i can’t read’ or ‘i can’t see that far’ or ‘bringer it closer so i can see’ in the past 5 days has been humbling beyond belief.
if you see any mistakes in my photo edits for the next 2-3 months, no u didn't. cool? 
we did it. left eye’s corneal tissue healed well this past month.
idk how to explain the magnitude of relief, happiness and grief i felt all at once just a little while ago.
i looked through the viewfinder of my camera with my right eye after 10+ years. i froze for a few seconds before i could process that I am seeing everything so clearly…
i looked through the viewfinder of my camera with my right eye after 10+ years. i froze for a few seconds before i could process that I am seeing everything so clearly…
context: i had to adapt my muscle memory to shift to my left eye to see through the viewfinder 10+ years ago when i found out my right eye’s cornea was deforming.
for those of you who are reading about this part of my life for the first time, if you're curious what's up here is the tweet where i shared about what happened a long time ago.
Hi, I’m Priyanka and I’m a photographer who has Post LASIK Ectasia and here’s my story.
About the bokeh shape I talked about in this post, this is the closest sample I could find of how a single point of light source looks like when you have keratoconus or post lasik ectasia. The second photo is what I drew years ago with my left eye closed & thats what I see.
my uncle saw me on facetime after longtime and i was wearing glasses. he said “chasma sara lage che, pehrje roj” 😭 i wish someone would’ve said that to me 12 years ago before i got LASIK done and fucked up my eyes for life😭😭😭 i know we can’t live life thinking about what would’ve could’ve should’ve been but sometimes life just hits you right in the feels okay. gujju to english translation: you look good in glasses. wear em everyday okay?
after *a long time
💙 1125 $degen @priyanka ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ from /subscribe
🫂💛💛🫂
cornea chronicles, life with post lasik ectasia make sure you read the article online bc the frame doesn't show you all the tweets i've added for context https://paragraph.xyz/@priyanka/cor
Obviously you wouldn't wish for this experience, but I can't help feeling like the impact it's had on your art and process is extremely interesting. Yes, we all incorporate and work through our struggles in our art, but this is literally, physically tied to your craft. You have a truly unique perspective.
appreciate you taking the time to read all of it, steen. i do agree with you bc i wonder about it all the time wrt how my photography(shooting and editing) would be different if it wasn’t for all of this and also question what my “why” would’ve been in an alt life where my sight was normal. 🥹🥺🥺
Thank you for sharing. The fun things to ponder eh?
Ty for sharing reading rn
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Hope screen time doesn’t make it any worse sounds serious 😭