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The RugMom Thinks It’s Nice That You Do That Computer Money Stuff
GREAT FALLS — On a recent call with your mother, the subject of what you do for a living inevitably came up. You went on to explain, for the seventh time this month, how you now audit smart contracts for flaws and vulnerabilities, earning a combination of fiat and ETH on a biweekly basis. Your mom replied, “I don’t know what any of that means, but it’s really nice how you do that computer money stuff.” Early attempts to explain your vocation to your mother go back to early 2021 when you were ...
The RugTwitter Rebrands to “X” Commemorating Drop to 10th Best Social Media Platform
SAN FRANCISCO — In a celebratory move, Twitter CEO Elon Musk changed the name of the platform to “X” commemorating its spot on a list of social media platforms. According to HootSuite, it now ranks 10th behind powerhouses such as Truth Social and Holla. Before the new list was announced Musk was planning to rebrand his social media company as “X AE, v. non-child.” Employees breathed a sigh of relief. “Pretty sure we would have immediately lost all of our users if he named us that,” said Chief...
The RugVitalik Suspected of Extraterrestrial Origins
EARTH — Conspiracy theorists have taken to Reddit this week in a wild and unfounded notion that Ethereum founder Vitalik Buterin is from a recently discovered planet located between Venus and Mercury. Redditors are calling the planet “Cryptomar.” The contention that the blockchain guru is from another planetary body is loosely based on conjecture that he “looks like an alien” and the fact that he put Earth as his location in his twitter bio.Vitalik lists twitter location as "Earth".Despite al...
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The RugMom Thinks It’s Nice That You Do That Computer Money Stuff
GREAT FALLS — On a recent call with your mother, the subject of what you do for a living inevitably came up. You went on to explain, for the seventh time this month, how you now audit smart contracts for flaws and vulnerabilities, earning a combination of fiat and ETH on a biweekly basis. Your mom replied, “I don’t know what any of that means, but it’s really nice how you do that computer money stuff.” Early attempts to explain your vocation to your mother go back to early 2021 when you were ...
The RugTwitter Rebrands to “X” Commemorating Drop to 10th Best Social Media Platform
SAN FRANCISCO — In a celebratory move, Twitter CEO Elon Musk changed the name of the platform to “X” commemorating its spot on a list of social media platforms. According to HootSuite, it now ranks 10th behind powerhouses such as Truth Social and Holla. Before the new list was announced Musk was planning to rebrand his social media company as “X AE, v. non-child.” Employees breathed a sigh of relief. “Pretty sure we would have immediately lost all of our users if he named us that,” said Chief...
The RugVitalik Suspected of Extraterrestrial Origins
EARTH — Conspiracy theorists have taken to Reddit this week in a wild and unfounded notion that Ethereum founder Vitalik Buterin is from a recently discovered planet located between Venus and Mercury. Redditors are calling the planet “Cryptomar.” The contention that the blockchain guru is from another planetary body is loosely based on conjecture that he “looks like an alien” and the fact that he put Earth as his location in his twitter bio.Vitalik lists twitter location as "Earth".Despite al...
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TOKYO — Amidst tumultuous markets, Bitcoin has apparently appointed Balaji Srinivasan as its new Chief Marketing Officer. The decentralized entity came to this centralized decision by meme-ing ordinal NFT’s on the blockchain in sequence to reassemble Srinivasan’s image in the aggregate, beneath which in alpha-numberic code was scripted, CMO.
Ordinals creator Casey Rodarmor commented, “Yeah, it was purely emergent behavior, almost like it came from the depths of the nexus itself… we started seeing what appeared to be pixelated bits appear in sequence, each minted as a digital artifact, and then one of the sleuths at reddit realized it was like one of those impressionist paintings you had to back away from to see it was a bowl of fruit. In this case it was Balaji Srinivasan.”
Srinivasan has wasted no time in light of a recent $1M Dollar bet he has made on the price of bitcoin over the next 90 days. Balaji appeared in sequence on The Scoop with Frank Chapparro, The What is Money Show with Robert Breedlove, and Bankless with Ryan Sean Adams and David Hoffman. On each of these episodes he put forth his primary vision for the blossoming of digital gold amidst a world of centralized luddites clinging to debt and over-collateralization.
“We have to think of the centralized bank, The Fed, and its member banks, as Uncle Sam Bankman Fried-Chicken. They’re serving us mouth watering numbers which have papered over a gaping hole in their balance sheet. If all the small wings and thighs roll up into the big four chicken breasts, the whole country will be run by KFC.”
Balaji’s bit signal has landed him interviews with mainstream media as well, such as the likes of Forbes. A journalist from that outfit, Katherine Meyerson had this to say of Srinivasan, “He’s got a track record of calling things accurately, having batted a thousand on the covid epidemic, where he rang the alarm in January several months before it all went haywire.”
Social-psychologist Gerard Fyor of New York University noted,
“There is a self-fulfilling prophecy to bold predictions that receive large amounts of media attention, wherein the culture becomes spellbound by the prospect itself, which can lead to the very outcome prognosticated.” To which he added, “My son also just texted me Doge coin to the moon. So there’s that too.”
Regardless of the outcome of his “bit signal”, Balaji has put Bitcoin back on the map, which is the mark of any good CMO.
Bitcoin is up 4% on the news.
For more mostly credible web3 news, follow @therugnews on Twitter and subscribe to our newsletter.
TOKYO — Amidst tumultuous markets, Bitcoin has apparently appointed Balaji Srinivasan as its new Chief Marketing Officer. The decentralized entity came to this centralized decision by meme-ing ordinal NFT’s on the blockchain in sequence to reassemble Srinivasan’s image in the aggregate, beneath which in alpha-numberic code was scripted, CMO.
Ordinals creator Casey Rodarmor commented, “Yeah, it was purely emergent behavior, almost like it came from the depths of the nexus itself… we started seeing what appeared to be pixelated bits appear in sequence, each minted as a digital artifact, and then one of the sleuths at reddit realized it was like one of those impressionist paintings you had to back away from to see it was a bowl of fruit. In this case it was Balaji Srinivasan.”
Srinivasan has wasted no time in light of a recent $1M Dollar bet he has made on the price of bitcoin over the next 90 days. Balaji appeared in sequence on The Scoop with Frank Chapparro, The What is Money Show with Robert Breedlove, and Bankless with Ryan Sean Adams and David Hoffman. On each of these episodes he put forth his primary vision for the blossoming of digital gold amidst a world of centralized luddites clinging to debt and over-collateralization.
“We have to think of the centralized bank, The Fed, and its member banks, as Uncle Sam Bankman Fried-Chicken. They’re serving us mouth watering numbers which have papered over a gaping hole in their balance sheet. If all the small wings and thighs roll up into the big four chicken breasts, the whole country will be run by KFC.”
Balaji’s bit signal has landed him interviews with mainstream media as well, such as the likes of Forbes. A journalist from that outfit, Katherine Meyerson had this to say of Srinivasan, “He’s got a track record of calling things accurately, having batted a thousand on the covid epidemic, where he rang the alarm in January several months before it all went haywire.”
Social-psychologist Gerard Fyor of New York University noted,
“There is a self-fulfilling prophecy to bold predictions that receive large amounts of media attention, wherein the culture becomes spellbound by the prospect itself, which can lead to the very outcome prognosticated.” To which he added, “My son also just texted me Doge coin to the moon. So there’s that too.”
Regardless of the outcome of his “bit signal”, Balaji has put Bitcoin back on the map, which is the mark of any good CMO.
Bitcoin is up 4% on the news.
For more mostly credible web3 news, follow @therugnews on Twitter and subscribe to our newsletter.
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