The RugVitalik Suspected of Extraterrestrial Origins
EARTH — Conspiracy theorists have taken to Reddit this week in a wild and unfounded notion that Ethereum founder Vitalik Buterin is from a recently discovered planet located between Venus and Mercury. Redditors are calling the planet “Cryptomar.” The contention that the blockchain guru is from another planetary body is loosely based on conjecture that he “looks like an alien” and the fact that he put Earth as his location in his twitter bio.Vitalik lists twitter location as "Earth".Despite al...
The RugTwitter Rebrands to “X” Commemorating Drop to 10th Best Social Media Platform
SAN FRANCISCO — In a celebratory move, Twitter CEO Elon Musk changed the name of the platform to “X” commemorating its spot on a list of social media platforms. According to HootSuite, it now ranks 10th behind powerhouses such as Truth Social and Holla. Before the new list was announced Musk was planning to rebrand his social media company as “X AE, v. non-child.” Employees breathed a sigh of relief. “Pretty sure we would have immediately lost all of our users if he named us that,” said Chief...
The RugPetty Thugs Look for Curve CEO
LONDON — Curve CEO Michael Egorov owes money all over the blockchain. The DeFI guru is 80 M in debt, leveraged to his eyeballs, and staring down the barrel of a margin call shotgun. Blockchains, and their protocol's, are notorious for being "unhuman", that is strictly ran on code. However, given the outsized position of Egorov's debt he now has several petty thugs passing his photo around town, and asking if, "anybody has seen him." Unfortunately the thugs are not that bright, and t...
Web3's mostly credible news source. We take money, seriously.
The RugVitalik Suspected of Extraterrestrial Origins
EARTH — Conspiracy theorists have taken to Reddit this week in a wild and unfounded notion that Ethereum founder Vitalik Buterin is from a recently discovered planet located between Venus and Mercury. Redditors are calling the planet “Cryptomar.” The contention that the blockchain guru is from another planetary body is loosely based on conjecture that he “looks like an alien” and the fact that he put Earth as his location in his twitter bio.Vitalik lists twitter location as "Earth".Despite al...
The RugTwitter Rebrands to “X” Commemorating Drop to 10th Best Social Media Platform
SAN FRANCISCO — In a celebratory move, Twitter CEO Elon Musk changed the name of the platform to “X” commemorating its spot on a list of social media platforms. According to HootSuite, it now ranks 10th behind powerhouses such as Truth Social and Holla. Before the new list was announced Musk was planning to rebrand his social media company as “X AE, v. non-child.” Employees breathed a sigh of relief. “Pretty sure we would have immediately lost all of our users if he named us that,” said Chief...
The RugPetty Thugs Look for Curve CEO
LONDON — Curve CEO Michael Egorov owes money all over the blockchain. The DeFI guru is 80 M in debt, leveraged to his eyeballs, and staring down the barrel of a margin call shotgun. Blockchains, and their protocol's, are notorious for being "unhuman", that is strictly ran on code. However, given the outsized position of Egorov's debt he now has several petty thugs passing his photo around town, and asking if, "anybody has seen him." Unfortunately the thugs are not that bright, and t...
Web3's mostly credible news source. We take money, seriously.
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SAN SALVADOR — Earlier today, El Salvador’s government announced that it will mint a copy of their country’s Constitution as an NFT on the bitcoin blockchain.
“Someday, bitcoin will host a distinct global culture that will rival Ethereum,” President Nayib Bukele proclaimed. “We think that culture should be El Salvadoran.”
Another anonymous government spokesman defended the unusual use of funds with the most succinct bull case possible for Ordinal NFTs: “In twenty years, we will all either be rich or dumb. Here in El Salvador, we say ‘Por que no los dos?’”
Bitcoiners are not taking the news well.
“This isn't how bitcoin should be used,” Michael Saylor explained. “We don’t like NFTs, or smart contracts, or any of this artsy-fartsy stuff. Bitcoin is a currency. The citizens of the world need to quit finding artistic and profitable ways to use our blockchain. They can take that nonsense somewhere else.”
Many commenters on Twitter agreed.
“The whole point of bitcoin is to obviate centralized governments,” @TakeTheOrangePill posted before adding: “El Salvador can suck it lol”.
A small percentage of bitcoiners are meeting the news with open arms.
“Bitcoin culture already sucks,” Mark Cuban said. “We could honestly use a little more of the El Salvadorans’ joie de vivre.”
Bitcoin is down 3% on the day.
For more mostly credible web3 news, follow @therugnews on Twitter and subscribe to our newsletter.
SAN SALVADOR — Earlier today, El Salvador’s government announced that it will mint a copy of their country’s Constitution as an NFT on the bitcoin blockchain.
“Someday, bitcoin will host a distinct global culture that will rival Ethereum,” President Nayib Bukele proclaimed. “We think that culture should be El Salvadoran.”
Another anonymous government spokesman defended the unusual use of funds with the most succinct bull case possible for Ordinal NFTs: “In twenty years, we will all either be rich or dumb. Here in El Salvador, we say ‘Por que no los dos?’”
Bitcoiners are not taking the news well.
“This isn't how bitcoin should be used,” Michael Saylor explained. “We don’t like NFTs, or smart contracts, or any of this artsy-fartsy stuff. Bitcoin is a currency. The citizens of the world need to quit finding artistic and profitable ways to use our blockchain. They can take that nonsense somewhere else.”
Many commenters on Twitter agreed.
“The whole point of bitcoin is to obviate centralized governments,” @TakeTheOrangePill posted before adding: “El Salvador can suck it lol”.
A small percentage of bitcoiners are meeting the news with open arms.
“Bitcoin culture already sucks,” Mark Cuban said. “We could honestly use a little more of the El Salvadorans’ joie de vivre.”
Bitcoin is down 3% on the day.
For more mostly credible web3 news, follow @therugnews on Twitter and subscribe to our newsletter.
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